JC's kick up the butt diary!

3Dogs

savingwannabe wrote: »

BLT why do men hit women?

Dear SW - it's for the power - some of them are bullies but need to 'apologise' so their victim stays with them to be abused again .... and again .... and again....

loopylorial

scrooge2008 wrote: »

Hi JC,

The way I have read your diary, is that while you behave in a certain way, i.e. allow him to be a totally dominant male at the expense of your mental and physical welfare, you have a chance of preserving yourself physically but not mentally.

Challenge him and physically you are in grave danger.

Hi JC

I have just read through the whole of your thread and what Scrooge says is so correct. I have found myself in this position too and it'a a horrible place to be. I really do hope that you can get away and start a new life for yourself and your daughter. As you've said before you are a strong person and you will cope and life can and will be so much sweeter. Please do not stay as it will, as scrooge says, be bad for you mentally or physically and maybe even both.

Sending strength your way! x

loopylorial

3Dogs wrote: »

Dear SW - it's for the power - some of them are bullies but need to 'apologise' so their victim stays with them to be abused again .... and again .... and again....

Most definitely bullies and I've been reading about narcissism of late and believe this can play a part. I feel crazy as I stayed and didn't even get apologised too - he certainly needed to make me feel the problem was ALL me and I was always questioning myself.

purpleheather2810

Hi again

As promised, I have a couple of links for you to look at. I really hope you get a chance to read the information about keeping safe.

http://refuge.org.uk/get-help-now/help-for-women/keeping-safe/
http://www.womensaid.org.uk/

We are all here for you xxxxxxx

savingwannabe

JC. I am really worried. You always post quite early in the evening. I think you would have found a way if you could. Please can you ask your mother and father to take you to their house. Don't pack anything till they are in the house with you. If he does not let you out of the house he must let your daughter go to school. She must tell a teacher.

If you need to move out for some space come and stay with me. Please read my PM.

Big hugs,

You have many friends on here, it may feel like it but you are NOT alone.

your friend, Saving wannabe.

purpleheather2810

SW it was your post on mouseann's thread which made me come here and read. Hope JC posts soon xxxx

moo2moo

Morning JC. Hoping today is the start of a better day for you. No doubt you'll have been doing an awful lot of thinking over the past few days. Hope you've reached a conclusion that both you and your daughter can live with happily.

jasperconran

morning everyone. I am still here! Firstly, I would like to thank each and everyone of you for your support. I have been totally overwhelmed with the support that I am receiving. To savingwannabe, thank you (hugs) for the support that you have got for me, its really appreciated.

I have read each and every post that has been written. OH was leaving again last night, but decided not to (double dammit:mad:) the one thing we did agree on was that DD must not go thru/witness what she did at the weekend. That was totally unforgivable and OH knows that, he did apologise (big deal!). I have decided to go with one suggestion that was posted, I am going to pretend to "tow the line" and play along with OH whilst planning my escape for me and DD. Now you are probably all going to sit here and think "is she nuts!?!?" But I need a plan of action before I can go anywhere. I will sort out the bank account this week. Rightly or wrongly, I am not going to tell OH about it. All the bills are in my name anyway, the only joint things are mortgage and secured loan. He can keep our joint account as his spending money account, I dont care.

My parents dont know about this yet, I will tell them. However, I have decided to follow one piece of advice my father gave me, and that is to keep a secret diary. I have written everything down that I have suffered so far, dates, times etc. My father suggested this so that when it comes to it, I will have written evidence to give to a solicitor and also he said that I could use it as a possible 'bargaining chip' with OH. OH has mentioned many times before during an argument (so i dont know if he means it or not) that I will never get the house from him, he would kill me first. idiot, who does he think he is, the godfather or something!?

I am glad in some ways, that I am doing the course I am on, it will keep my mind occupied which is a good thing at the moment.

BLT, your posts still crack me up! lol. Savingwannabe, bless you my friend, I knew you would be there for me.

I meant what I said, I have been totally overwhelmed by the support I have been given. I wish I had found this forum years ago. I have never come across such a bunch of lovely, non-judgmental, supportive people in my life.

I will try and post later on if I can. have a good day everyone, be safe, be happy xx

savingwannabe

:j:wave::kisses3:

Thank goodness you are ok.

JC you must go to your doctor. He is an independent witness to your injuries. If later OH wants to fight for your daughter it is extra evidence for you to be allowed to keep her.

Please tell your parents. They love and support you. Think of your daughter. Would you want to know if someone was hurting her?

Remember all of our offers. We are only a little way away. You should not be going through this alone.

Welcome back.

SW

jasperconran

savingwannabe wrote: »

:j:wave::kisses3:

Thank goodness you are ok.

JC you must go to your doctor. He is an independent witness to your injuries. If later OH wants to fight for your daughter it is extra evidence for you to be allowed to keep her.

Please tell your parents. They love and support you. Think of your daughter. Would you want to know if someone was hurting her?

Remember all of our offers. We are only a little way away. You should not be going through this alone.

Welcome back.

SW

hi savingwannabe, thank you for your offer. I forget to mention in my last post, I had already decided to go back to my doctor anyway. I didnt realise until yesterday morning, that when I hit my head on Saturday, I also hurt my shoulder. Yesterday afternoon was when I realised, my shoulder was really hurting, my back/bum was hurting. I obviously hit the floor alot harder than I thought.

I will be around for a long time to come, dont you worry about that! I am not going to let anyone beat me. I will look after myself and DD.

take care, speak soon x