JC's kick up the butt diary!

jasperconran

thanks Choc-addict, will have a look at those. Well, I have had an awful weekend, I have (and still got) flu, I have felt sick and awful. to top it all yesterday me and OH had another massive row.

It was awful, he pushed me over in the kitchen andi banged my head on the patio door. DD rushed in and shouted get the hell away from my mum leave her alone. She was sooooo brave to do that. He then turned on her and roughly picked her up and dragged her upstairs. She told him to go to hell. I tried to step in, she cried and screamed, save me mum, please help mum, please help me. I was devasted, I could do nothing. He is alot bigger than me. DD grabbed her mobile and said I am calling the police on you.

He did finally leave, but his family talked him into coming back. I wish they hadnt. as far as I am concerned our marriage is over, I dont know if I can stay with him until DD is 16. DD doesnt want him to leave, and he had promised her that he wouldnt. But I fear that more damage will be done to all of us, if he stays any longer.

Hope the rest of you are ok, I have to go now and act normal for DD's sake, I hate it.

talk soon xxxxxxxxx:(

savingwannabe

Oh my gosh. I kept thinking about you yesterday but i was hoping for the best. This is wrong. He is not allowed to hurt you at all. Have you told your mum and dad?

BLT where are you????? Urgent advice needed.

I am a coward. I grew up with this from the age of about 11. It didn't end till about 3 years ago as i would always go back home and try to visit my parents and my brother would continue. I might be biased but i think you must go to CAB and get legal help. They will tell you what to do. I wonder if mum, dad, a friend can move in so you dont feel so scared.

One thing i do know even if he says he is sorry he isnt. This has gone too far. I am praying for you. He is so stupid. What on earth is he doing?

savingwannabe

I have emailed my dear friends on Mouseann's thread Frightened for my future. They are all very kind and will have sensible suggestions.

You are not alone. He is wrong. We all think so much of you JC and i am praying too. God will protect you.

Big hug and lots of love,

SW

savingwannabe

Did you call the police? Probably not as it is so shameful when it happens. It is not your fault. Please call them now with mum and dad in the room. They will have advice. He has broken the law. People are not allowed to be violent.

mouseann

Hi JC,

Our friend from my thread has just told us all about your current situation. Have just read some of your posts and think this is appalling.

I hope you find a way of getting out of this abusive relationship. I am sure it will not be an easy decision for you to make but for the sake of your safety and sanity I think you need to protect yoursellf and your daughter.

I hope you manage to find a "safe haven" with friends and family.

Everyone on my thread is supportive of you and have already been posting messages about it. Perhaps when you are feeling stronger you can "drop by" and join in - we do have a lot of light-hearted banter, but my own experience is that it can help when faced with such an uphill battle.

Anyway, the link is

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/comment/32637671#Comment_32637671

Please take care of yourself and your daugher.

Mouseann

jinny

hi Jc our friend has asked us to give you some support come on over to us we will be there for you. There has never been a nasty poster on there just some banter to help us through our debt problems you would be very welcome indeed. In the meantime please make yourself safe the police are better at this situ than they used to be. Dont hesitate to call them please be safe.
http://www.crimereduction.homeoffice...violence40.htm
this may help you XXX

pixiechick_2

Hi JC

I've just popped over from Mouseann's thread to offer you support.

I haven't read all of your thread, just the last couple of pages, and I can empathise with you as I have been in a similar position in the past. Men don't like the woman to be the voice of reason or to act in their best interests, I don't know if it makes them feel less manly or what. Once a situation turns violent, you need to make some difficult choices, for both your and your daughter's sakes. I hope you can find the strength to make the right choice, you have plenty of kind people on MSE for support.

Take care.

Pixie x

moo2moo

Phone the non-emergency police number for your local station and make an informal statment. This ogre no longer has any respect for you or your daughter. What happens he next time when you end up with a broekn nose or arm or bruises from "falling down the stairs". Enoughs enough. Either change the locks or go to your parents but you really need to show him that this is no longer tolerable. Hes done it once, no matter how remorseful he is now he'll do it again and again and again. If hes dragging your daughter around by her hair whats to stop him from using her as a punchbag when you're not available?

savingwannabe

JC we are all offering advice as we care. ~Some of us have experienced something like this before and most of us know friends going through it too. I hope you are spending the day with your parents and daughter. We are all thinking of you.

You have many friends here.

Saving wannabeXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Buffythedebtslayer

Just to say I am thinking of you JC, hope you are safe now xxx