Kissing parents/family members

SandC

I find it awkward and we have never been a kissy huggy family. I started to force myself to kiss my dad and stepmum on the cheek when I left them after my dad started to get seriously bad health, which I am glad of. I kiss my brother on the cheek at Xmas and if I am p*ssed.

I have started to give friends a hug and air kiss or cheek kiss but I still don't feel comfortable with it at all. I tolerate it from acquaintances who seem to think it's the 'done thing' but that's as far as it goes.

We are not in bloody France.

MERFE

My son is nearly 4 and has already grown out of kisses on the lips, if I'm lucky i get one on the cheek. DD still likes a kiss on the lips though but cuddles and I love you are fine. I do think once you are grown you prehaps dont need to hear it after every phonecall - your not married after all. MIL is very lovey dovey with OH, lots of I love yous and I miss yous all the time but we see her more now we live 250miles away than we did when we were 5 mins down the road and for someone that misses OH so much she books an awful lot of appointments for when we do visit. I find it a bit all talk and saying the right things and fake actually - actions speak louder.

GSXRCarlos

At the LabLover, if your sis is that nice can you give her my number???

but seriously, i think kissing family on the lips is a bit wierd.

I come from a huggy/kissy family, but now i'm older i find it more awkward to know what to do

I've never kissed anyone on the lips (except for as a small child) and sometimes find it uncomfortable to hug/kiss others on the cheek

My mum gets kisses on birthdays or mothersdays, grandparents get similar, and i have very little physical contact with my dad, hugs only on birthdays really

Oh yeah, i never hug or kiss my sister, i get/give more affection to female friends and their little children than i do to/from my sister (my choice)

miss_independent

I'm an Aquarian! My mum and dad and I sometimes (birthdays, christmas, special occasions) hug and peck each other on the cheek and being a theatrical sort my luvvie friends all do the air kiss/hug thing but I have an auntie who has no children and thinks that all I must do when I'm at home is hug and kiss my mother and whenever we see my auntie she makes this huge deal of going "Helloooooooo DAHLING, Mwaoh, Mwaoh, Mwoah" and does the massive hug, kiss the cheeks three times thing - IT DRIVES ME MAD :mad:! It happens in church, in town, wherever we bump into her and I find it really embarassing as it is too in your face, loud and over the top. My mum (her sister) says to put up with it as it is to do with the fact she has never married and doesn't have children so it is the only affection she gets but it does get to me - what's wrong with a "Hello" and a quiet air kiss? Also, my Grandmother lives with her so I am expected to do the whole routine and hug and kiss her and go "DARLING!" every time I see her which I don't mind really but if I have just nipped to the shop after seeing her an hour before, it gets a bit much if I'm expected to do it all over again.

Coincidently I'm not English and my dad's side of the family genuinely do the kiss three times thing but it is very subtle, and not in your face at all and I can't say I mind it - its when it seems fake I don't like it. My aunt is british but I think has always secretly wanted to be Italian (as a little girl I actually did think my name was Bambina or Piccolina thanks to her!) so maybe this is where the extensive greeting process has come from. It really bugs me though because as a little girl I was expected to go and sit on her knee and tell her how much I loved her and kiss and hug her for hours on end and I didn't get that kind of affection myself at home from my own parents. I felt uncomfortable with it and I don't think children should be forced to kiss or hug anyone. By the time I was 8, I realised that if you don't feel inside that you want to hug or kiss someone then doing so is not coming from a genuine place and you can't force those feelings. I do like hugging my parents and friends at the right occasion but I really don't want to be made to feel like I have to kiss or hug someone. I hate "fake" displays of affection. EDIT: I always tell my parents "I Love You" at the end of a phone call or when I am going out the door - and my friends think I'm weird because of that!

Also, and I do apologise for this but I think kissing anyone other that your BF/DH or your very young sons or daughters on the mouth is a little weird. I remember from being 12-15 my auntie had a boyfriend who I was also expected to do the whole huggy huggy kissy kissy routine with and whenever I went for the cheek he used to kiss my on the mouth and I felt really weird about it. He definitely wasn't a !!!!!phile but it just felt odd and I used to dread having to greet him or say goodbye! I would hate my brother or any of my male cousins kissing me on the mouth too, in fact any friend or relation of either sex! Just my boyfriend is allowed to do that thankyou very much. In the right circumstances, with the right person, I don't mind being touchy feely at all (in fact, I really like it!) but I suppose in someways I am a little closed off and don't feel comfortable just hugging and kissing everyone. I never trust anyone who hugs or kisses me or calls me names like "Honey" the first time I meet them. And I have never been proved wrong with that judgement so far. Anyway, I digress! Sorry for the rant:D!

Gingernutmeg

My family aren't that demonstrative. I'll briefly hug and kiss my mum and grandparents because that's what we do in my family, but I'd never dream of kissing a family member on the lips!

I actually really dislike hugging and kissing 'strangers' and I really hate this modern habit of hugging and kissing when you meet and say goodbye. Especially when it's that exaggerated 'mwah-mwah' kind of kissing on both cheeks. I really hate it when someone invades my personal space, and my OH jokes that he's had to teach me how to hug lol. I still can't stand it when people bound up to you and give you a hug, I just tend to stiffen and look really uncomfortable. I have no idea why as I'm an affectionate person when it comes to speaking and writing (I'll quite happily tell someone I love them, and every phone call to my mum ends like that), but I just cannot do the whole touchy-feely huggy-kissy thing. Urgh.

sibles

I do the huggy kissy thing with both my family and my OH's family.
I adore them all and love to show that. I also try very hard to tell my parents and sister I love them on the phone - I do, and its important to me they know that.

B (an Aquarian!)

LabLover

I must admit that after the mistaken lesbian incident the other week I have thought that maybe my sister kissing me on the lips is a bit much But i still have no issue with kissing my mum and dad on the cheek and saying I love you after phone calls and visits. As I said in previous post about my brother you never know when u might be seeing some one for the last time. Im not that tactile with friends tho for some reason it just seems fake , so I dont bother with air kisses or cuddles.

cupcake83

bellrooster wrote: »

My family aren't huggers and kissers! I find it a bit weird although I do hug and kiss my daughter, but she's 4!

My OH's family are huggers and kissers, which is fine, but I don't like it when I'm expected to join in! I like my own space and am very much aware of my personal 'bubble' and the only people who I feel totally at ease with is my OH and my DD.

I'm the same I am absolutely fine with my DS and hug and kiss him (on the cheek and forehead) all the time anyone else I'm not that comfortable with I hug my close friend but I've known her for 14 years. My OH can be a bit too much sometimes very huggy feely person, his family are like this too which is where he gets it from. Although they don't kiss on the lips, I just find this a bit weird.

NJW69

I kiss both my Mum and Dad on the lips, and my DS (19 years), SS (33 years) but not my SD (29 years). Kiss her on the cheek.

Not uncomfortable with it at all. Take my lead from them really.

Kiss friends on the cheek as I do close work colleagues.

Also shake hands with other people who want to do that instead.

jamespir

i say i love you to my mum when i finished on the phone but i dont think i would kiss her on the lips