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'Quality' Time?
Comments
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My own personal experience (from RL people I don't just mean me and hubby) has been that it is more likely to be women who do the guilt trip more about things not being 'perfect' to how other people percieve 'perfect' to be- if I'm making any sense!
Yet, as men generally work for longer away from their children, the time that they have with them, I feel they work harder at it being quality time, more than the Mums, because the Mums spend more time with the kids.
It's all a generalisation, some men won't care and some women don't care, I think on the whole it's pretty well split with equal numbers of either sex being a certain way.
Although of course men are better at itFreedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.0 -
Lotus-eater wrote: »Although of course men are better at it
Although IME, if you get both parents present it will be the mum who is 'aware' what the children are doing, it's the old multi-tasking thing. Dads can only do one thing at a time, so if they are chatting to a friend, they cannot also be aware of what the little darlings are up to. Or if they are reading to one child, the other could be setting fire to the curtains and Dad might not notice ...Signature removed for peace of mind0 -
Shall I just write, Mum's are great, dad's are crap with children and get it over with? :wall:
As that seems to be the general view round here, maybe it's better to just give in and agree with you.Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.0 -
I will stick up for you Lotus and say not all men are like that...My OH
is very good at multitasking and we had a period of me working full time when he was made redundant and he looked after the kids, he would have been happy to carry this on, but I wasn't I wanted to be at home. But in the future we may look at this again.
Yes he feels guilty about not getting to spend enough time with the kids as I do....I have explained to him though that a lot of my time is taken up doing housey things so Im really not sat playing all day, I probably have as much time with them as he does. Your Oh probably feel the same if she is out at work all day....like the thread title suggests it not about the amount of time you have with them its about the quality of it.**"Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin."**0 -
Lotus eater- I hadn'teven realised till your last post that you were male. To put it another way IME Dads aren't so 'female doggy' (getting round the swear filter;)) about otherDads choices. I doubt my husband has even thought about another bloke that 'he never takes the kids swimming/to watch a film etc etc' in the way females will criticise each other.
My husband is indeed better playing with our kids- he perhaps doesn't do as much with them -he works f-time I don't but when he does they have his full attention he will concentrate on playing football with them, whereas shove me in goal as our 10yo likes to and my mind is on 'god, I hate football, I need to start tea, wonder if they have any homework, is there any clean uniform for tomorrow, I'm cold' and so on'0 -
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