The MSE Pregnancy Club

[Deleted User]

Just about to catch up on 5 pages of reading but wanted to post this first.

I'm 24 weeks pregnant and have been taking 1 day a week off as unpaid, as I have been unable to work full time. I have been doing this since 10 weeks. I did initially tell my boss that it would only be for a few months. However I have been too tired to go back to 5 days and so my boss let me continue doing taking the 1 day off.

However in my supervision this week, she announced that as of my last booked unpaid leave day (1st October) I will be unable to have anymore. We are short staffed and she can no longer manage the rota with me doing this. I can either take annual leave to take the days off I need or change my contract to 30 hours.

I thought here we go again, we've been here before. I'm not changing my contract and they can't make me. But can they lawfully make me use my annual leave in order to work a full time week? I have been down to the CAB and they say there is a maternity right which says I mustn't suffer a detriment. But I can't find anything which I can print off to show work which is LAWFUL. My midwife says it doesn't sound fair that I should be taking annual leave in order to work a full week and they should be supporting me to stay at work.

I don't know what to do or how to approach this. Personnel don't seem to be that helpful on this subject and tell me to talk to my boss or refer to me to my maternity pack which work gave me. This mentions nothing relevant to me.

I've googled and yahoo'd to try to find something concrete to show my boss. But am I being unfair? Is it realistic of work to expect me to use my annual leave in order to stay at work?

I am worrying myself about this and so need to sort this soon.

Thanks guys.

Bay

[Deleted User]

....and also

I was looking in Boots the other day and noticed they do their own brand for £2 ish, Avent do one for £5 ish and then another brand beginning with L***** (can't remember) was £9.99:eek:

Do they all do much the same or is it worth the extra expense?

rchddap1

I know you're allowed time off for appointments etc... But I don't know about taking a day off because you're simply tired and can't manage it. Especially without a sick note from the doctor. If the doctor signs you off sick then thats fine...but chances are you won't be working at all then.

Personally if I were personnel and someone wanted to take a day off a week for the reasons you describe I'd do the same as they have told you. That is, say you have to use your annual leave, or change your employment contract accordingly.

Just because you are pregnant it doesn't mean that you should get special allowances to time off over and above everyone else. I am coming up to 26 weeks at the moment. I leave the house at 7.15am and get back at 6.30pm. I do work in an office, but it is a long day. However, I am not getting any extra time off because I am tired....and believe me I am tired. My intention is to work as long as my stamina allows.

I think that your work at some point have to assess your working area and provide you with somewhere that you can rest, but they are not required to do what you are suggesting.

You are able to take maternity leave from 29 weeks. So if you are finding things hard you should consider leaving early. From here on in its only going to get worse...due to late night loo breaks, larger belly etc....

Sorry if its not what you want to hear, but I can't see how your work aren't being fair.

[Deleted User]

Thank you for your honesty, your right it wasn't what I wanted to hear, but I asked for opinions and wanted to know if I was expecting too much.

However its not just me who has thought this, which is why I posted.

I work shifts either starting at 7.30 for an early or finishing at 10pm for a late. My job is physical and tiring. Due to the nature of the shifts I have a 6 week rolling rota. On one of those weeks I work 6 days on the trot, on another week I work 7 days. So can you see why I have been finding it hard? I have also only put on 2lbs during my pregnancy to date and it is thought by my MW that I am losing weight even though the baby is a good size. This has been making me extremely tired.

Anyway that is besides the point. I do not expect any preferential treatment from work, in actual fact I still do the same amount of work in the 4 days I have been working than in the 5 days I were, in terms of additional duties and overseeing my 2 keyclients.

I just wanted to find out if what my manager was suggesting was right or wrong, as I am not always sure if she knows her facts.

Thanks for your help.

caleo

Hi Bailey

I had sever PND after my last baby, and when I started to feel better, wanted to return to work, but would not have managed full time. I work for a health trust, so you would have thought they would have been helpful in order to assist me with returning to work.

The Community trust allows their staff to return to work after illness with a phased return, but the hospital trust would not do this, I would have had to use all my AL. Unfortunately, I had to take all my AL prior to taking mat leave as they would not carry any over, so I had no AL left. Talking to personnel was like banging my head against a brick wall. Even Occupational Health couldn't do anything, as I was employed by the "wrong" trust!!

Unfortunately, the trust would not budge, and I had to stay off sick for an extra 3 months. It would have helped me mentally to return, but they were totally unhelpful.

I am now back at work and have started a new years AL which I am using so that I can do my own phased return.

Unfortunately, this is probably the only way you are going to manage to get the time off. My CPN who has supported me through the PND said I could always just go to work for 2 days and ring in sick for the rest of the week......but I decided against that!

After 20 years with a "caring" hospital trust, you would have thought that they would be able to show a little compassion, but they left my GP with no option but to sign me off sick for longer.

Your comment about Boots own and Avent........what product???

CaleoX

[Deleted User]

Thanks Caleo, I guess it depends on who you are employed by. Sounds like they didn't bend at all to help you out. A waste of a resource too, as I am sure you would have been better to be work for a phased return and getting some effort out of you, than you stuck at home un-necessarily.

The nipple cream, can't say I know much about it but is generally needed if you breast feed.

Bay

MadamBroke

Deleted_User wrote:

Thank you for your honesty, your right it wasn't what I wanted to hear, but I asked for opinions and wanted to know if I was expecting too much.

However its not just me who has thought this, which is why I posted.

I work shifts either starting at 7.30 for an early or finishing at 10pm for a late. My job is physical and tiring. Due to the nature of the shifts I have a 6 week rolling rota. On one of those weeks I work 6 days on the trot, on another week I work 7 days. So can you see why I have been finding it hard? I have also only put on 2lbs during my pregnancy to date and it is thought by my MW that I am losing weight even though the baby is a good size. This has been making me extremely tired.

Anyway that is besides the point. I do not expect any preferential treatment from work, in actual fact I still do the same amount of work in the 4 days I have been working than in the 5 days I were, in terms of additional duties and overseeing my 2 keyclients.

I just wanted to find out if what my manager was suggesting was right or wrong, as I am not always sure if she knows her facts.

Thanks for your help.

Its hard being pregnant and at work-when I was last pregnant i was working. I used to do differnt hours on differnt days, and the last day of the week it was the longest hours. I did talk to my manger and she said i can change your hours but you can drop some hours but it will affect the Mat. pay.....I ended up finishing at 29 weeks as by then id had enough. I will say they did let me do to all the appointments etc-so they was good like that.

So maybe you could drop a few hours or/and finish at 29 weeks. I suppose it depends how you feel and how you are money wise.

M.B.

oueyouey

Deleted_User wrote:

....and also

I was looking in Boots the other day and noticed they do their own brand for £2 ish, Avent do one for £5 ish and then another brand beginning with L***** (can't remember) was £9.99:eek:

Do they all do much the same or is it worth the extra expense?

My midwife says don't use anything other than the Lasinoah (think that's how it spelt) nipple cream

daisykate124

Lasinoah is the best, i used this from the first day my daughter was born and have not had any soreness or any other problems (thank goodness) i used this product for the first 4 -5 months, you only have to use a tiny bit so only bought one tube. My daughter is 10 months old next week and im still breastfeeding her and am really proud that i have been able to breast feed for such a long time

My advise to anybody who wants to breast feed is that the first few weeks are the most difficult and im not going to lie it hurts to begin with but when you have got over the toe curling bit:eek: it becomes the most enjoyable thing you can do with your baby and has made me bond with my little angel. I also suggest you express and give your baby a bottle at least once a day once your milk is established as ive had terrible trouble trying to get my daughter to have a bottle.

Lloyds chemist often has this cream on offer for £7.99 so may be worth keeping your eyes out just in case it comes on offer again

[Deleted User]

Those nipple cream tips are really useful thanks. I really really want to breast feed and hope I can express easily too, so DP can give a bottle.

Next question.....lol, I always have so many!!

We are going to be using reuseable nappies and I have bought some newborn and small wraps off ebay - 2 of each to beginning with. I was talking to my MIL2B about them and she said she was going to buy some plastic pants for her place for when she looks after Olo. She has already got some terries and a nappy bucket from the local paper.

I thought about it and then the next day DP said to her "you don't need to buy any, we'll send him over to you with a wrap or two, saves spending any money and they are more breathable so prevent nappy rash better". She was a little put out I think and said to DP "oh but you had plastic pants and they never did you any harm, you never had nappy rash".

I have spoken to a couple of people at work and they said their babies hardly had rashes, if you change regularly and use zinc and castor oil cream as a barrier you should be ok.

So I am wondering do I buy into the "new mum" thing of not knowing any better or should I go with the voices of experience? Are wraps essential (I can see their usefulness of breathability) or will the plastic pants be fine? Obviously plastic pants are much much cheaper.

I'd welcome any advice please.

Thank you.