£100,000 Debt "club"

kickingkay

dont you dare, im not going to say from here on it will be happy daze it wont but you have support here and we will do what we can to eaise your spirits,
my other half goes nothing towards sorting this out i know my debt ,not all of it but majority is mine, but i dont expect him to i just expect him to support me when i need him to tell hubby you need him and you want him to need you,
im not a marriage councillor god only knows i could use one myself at the mo but sometimes we can forget how to talk to each other and when you have stuff like this looming over you it becomes even harder to try
hugs n love
klare xx

lynzpower

Just thinking loud, if we sold a house say for £250K less mortgage £80K, we would have £170K to pay the debt and to buy a place to live. By the time we pay our debt and take in to account buying/selling solicitors and other fees what can we get for a £60K this days? We will prabably have to rent, which I think is a waste of money, but haven't really got any other ideas.

Im selling to rent, and I cant wait to get this place sold. Renting is likely to be cheaper than your mortgage. I used to think it was dead money, till I figured, well the interest to the bank on the mortgage is ALSO dead money, which ones worse? i think they are both about the same, dead money wise, but the other thing is if you are renting you dont have all the insurances to pay which for me totals about 80pcm plus repairs etc. You can sell your house for £350 these days ( housenetwork via quidco) and selling solicitors can cost about £500, so maybe you will have a bit more. Also bear in mind if you have 60k in the bank, youll be making around £300 pcm in interest ( thats a rough esimate BTW, ask on savings board theres bound to be a calulator) so after 3 months it would be 61k and so on.

Personally, I think selling might be a good plan, ( I would, Im doing it myself!!) get it sorted once and for all. You might get council tax benefit, housing benefit whatever, if you are on 15k and suporting both of you.

Sometimes you have to look at the lesser of the evils.

Debtomaniak

kickingkay wrote:

lines of communications open with hubby when he is ready he will turn to you im sure.

I hope for our both sake that he does let me help him
mine escalated from gambling when i was contacted from my brother to inform me our dad was dying from cancer,
so sorry
but if you fancy a buddy im here for you, we have a long journey ahead of us, thank you, think a kind word is priceless for me right now.

Debtomaniak

lynzpower wrote:

Renting is likely to be cheaper than your mortgage. I used to think it was dead money, till I figured, well the interest to the bank on the mortgage is ALSO dead money, which ones worse?
Thank you, that is a very good point, I shall remember that when I try to talk to my H, eventually.

You can sell your house for £350 these days ( housenetwork via quidco)
that is also true, I read about it in Money wise magazine

get it sorted once and for all. You might get council tax benefit, housing benefit whatever, if you are on 15k and suporting both of you. .

Council said because I am working we are not entitled to a housing benefit, but I got my H to wright to council again and see if he takes any notice.

Justindebt

Debtomaniak......are you my wife?

:rotfl:

100K and change, that's me....kept it from her for two years but she found out a few weeks ago.

I am having great difficulty with my mouse here, so I can't really type much.

We have a 60K mortgage on a house worth approx 350K, so our choice is selling the house or taking an extra amount on the mortgage.

Good luck to you.

Debtomaniak

Justindebt wrote:

Debtomaniak......are you my wife?

:rotfl:

100K and change, that's me....kept it from her for two years but she found out a few weeks ago.

I am having great difficulty with my mouse here, so I can't really type much.

We have a 60K mortgage on a house worth approx 350K, so our choice is selling the house or taking an extra amount on the mortgage.

Good luck to you.

Hi,
Well done you. You seem to be doing something about it. My hubby is still in denial. We defenetely have to sell our house, just waiting for my hubby to get to face the problem. Thanks for replying.

angelface

I really feel for you. I've never written about it before but I was made bankrupt 4 years ago. I owed about £30K and I swear i just wanted to kill myself. I dreaded the phone ringing, was petrified if there was a knock at the door and used to go to sleep wishing I'd never wake up. i didn't own property and after 3 years with CCCS haggling with the credit card companies to reduce my debt or at least freeze my interest I gave up and saw an insolvency guy. I can honestly say that although it will affect me for the rest of my life and that the day in the royal courts of justice I was pronounced bankrupt was one of the worst, I've never looked back. The sheer relief of facing up to it, of having the calls stopping, to not be thinking every second of every minute of every hour of every day of money and how can I get it and who do i pay - well I felt like I was floating. And I still do.

So whatever happens, although its hard, there is life after bankruptcy. The mental anguish stops, you take a good look at your life and you realise that if you really want to you can make your way forward and it will be an improvement on what has gone before. I'm going for a mortgage with my partner soon! It would have taken me 14 years to pay off my debts and i would never have dreamed that one day I may be a step closer to owning somewhere myself. My thoughts are with you, good luck. x

Debtomaniak

Hi Angelface,
thanks for your reply to me, it is very inspairing. I was thinking maybe my hubby sould go bankrupt, but after reading on about it, think we will be better of selling the house.
My biggest problem is talking to my H, as he doesn't want to and I feel awful presurising him even though I am trying to be careful with him. But I hope he will soon surrender his cards and statements so that we can both sit down and look where exactly we stand. He promissed me it is no more then £100K, I believe him, because I told him, that it was his chance to come out clean and tell me the truth and if he lied I would leave him.

lynzpower

How do you think he would feel if you showed him what you have written? Sometimes people do that with thier OHs it can help.

It sounds like whne push comes to shove, he does allow you to know some things, could push come to shove again?

Debtomaniak

Justindebt wrote:

Debtomaniak......are you my wife?

:rotfl:

100K and change, that's me....kept it from her for two years but she found out a few weeks ago.

I am having great difficulty with my mouse here, so I can't really type much.

We have a 60K mortgage on a house worth approx 350K, so our choice is selling the house or taking an extra amount on the mortgage.

Good luck to you.

Hi,
Just wondering being as you are in sort of same situation as my H and myself, could you please be so kind and perhaps advice me on how to make my H to open his eyes and start acting. Should I put presure on him or shall I wait till he "gets there"? If you could kindly express your opinion, because you must know better how it feels. Every time I try to mention the debt problem/solution he walks off. It starts to drive me mad, but ......