Cant afford my wife anymore

BILLIE

Enabler - where are you again? I know you are probably hurting from some of these posts, but unfortunately truth does hurt. come on you have put your head about the parapet and we all want to help. Come back and tell us what is going on now. Billie x

moneysavermum_2

I am a single parent to 3 and the youngest is 3. I work 30 hours and I know my ex husband would definately of not tolerated any nonsense about expensive beauty parlours/haircuts extravagence. Cos unless you are very financially secure. I mean savings of at least 6mths salary behind you...who can afford to throw moeny around and not work. I can see the op getting further and further into debt as he keeps up this lifestyle. Its just not realistic.

tiff

BILLIE wrote: »

Enabler - where are you again? I know you are probably hurting from some of these posts, but unfortunately truth does hurt. come on you have put your head about the parapet and we all want to help. Come back and tell us what is going on now. Billie x

I would imagine he's at work and only able to post in the evening.

euronorris

tiff wrote: »

I would imagine he's at work and only able to post in the evening.

I agree, and it hasn't even been 24 hours since his last post. Give him a chance! :rotfl::rotfl:

I'm sure he'll be back when he has the time.

BILLIE

Okay but I suppose I expected him to post more than once last night - have to wait and see if he responds tonight, although he may not like what he reads here today!! Billie xx

ninky_2

BILLIE wrote: »

Enabler - where are you again? I know you are probably hurting from some of these posts, but unfortunately truth does hurt. come on you have put your head about the parapet and we all want to help. Come back and tell us what is going on now. Billie x

not everyone's an MSE forum addict!

raq

couple of things jumped out but definately cut back on £500.00 a month on food for 3 people is a lot.

We are a family of 5, eat extremely well and spend £95.00 a week. That is also shopping fresh good quality food, nappies and a couple of beers for the hubby. So it is easily done. Oh and that is shopping in sainsbury's.
Best of luck

raq

Maybe this hasn't got much to do with the above but just wanted to say a couple of things. I often see more than a few mum's up the school, stating " been shopping today, only spend £300.00, then my nails, my hair oh and booked a table for this evening. I stand there and think, come back down to earth you lot, your husband.s business is in serious trouble and your standing there staying all this and yet you haven't really got a proper penny to scratch your who know what with. Annoying, really annoying and then look down on people.

Okay, back to me. We have had a few troubles with hubby business going slow, but I always clear out as much as we can in the house and jump straight onto ebay. Last week I made £102.00 and today £58.00. Believe me I was gonna put the items into the charity bag. So glad I didn't know. This money has now helped towards car tax, talktalk telephone bill and school lunch for next week.

There you go, moan over with.

dorisday

ninky wrote: »

not everyone's an MSE forum addict!

Having read this from start to finish I think its someone having a joke on us here at MSE or its someone really very very stupid! If its the second then why dont you WAKE up enabler. Look at your SOA you are around £1500 short every month and having gone over this a cut a few things down you are still £1000 a month short. How do you expect to make this up? Are there fairies at the bottom of your garden? It cant be blamed on your wife, you are the one bringing in the money at this house and therefore you are in charge of making things fit. You must have made your wife think you are making more money than you are because anyone in their right mind would know 2 - 3 makes minus 1 and not plus 1.

Fast forward 6 months, you will be in a worse situation than you are now, everything will have collapsed and even your health may have taken a turn for the worst. Being in debt with no light at the end of the tunnel wrecks your whole life.

The ONLY possible way forward with this is either your salary is increased by £1000 per month OR your wife gets a job with a take home pay of £1000 a month and thats even with many cut backs in your SOA. The other alternative and there is only 1, is to go bankrupt therefore squashing all your debts. But before you do this look at your soa carefully and you will realise you do not make enough to live off even without these debts!!!

This isnt an easy one as big changes will happen here with or without your consent its just a matter of time. But its up to you to try to make the landing slightly softer for both of you and of course your daughter. It can be done but will depend on whether you both get off your backsides and do something about it, or let the steam roller squash you both while you are thinking about it.

Ive been there, gone through horrendous times, ket the steam roller run me down, but then with advice from sources stood up and looked the demon in the eyes and changed my life around. Still in debt but I now sleep at nights, can answer the phone, dont wake up every morning feeling depressed cos I know I can face the world because im doing something about it myself.:j

debtdesperado

Someone might already have suggested this, (and I'm not sure if I have it right) but you could perhaps get two birds with one stone if you agree with your wife that if she finds a job, then you can start trying for a baby... even if she only works a couple of months before she gets pregnant, at least she will qualify for some maternity pay... every little helps and all that. And you never know, she might even like it and decide to go back (even part time) afterwards?