How many of you blame you OH for just being 'men'?!

timberflake

I often blame my OH for just being "women".........

euronorris

The OH can be lazy, but I honestly think that it is simply because it isn't a big deal to him, it doesn't annoy him like it does me.

But.....if I ask him to wash the dishes, tidy up etc etc, he will. But, I do ask him nicely, and if he's busy at that time, then I just trust him to do it later as he said.

ameliarate

I had exactly the same situation with my OH. If I "nagged him" - his words - he would end up getting angry and shouting then so would I so full blown row!!

I blame his mother because she picked up after them all. They develop a certain arrogance I think, they feel this stuff is beneath them because they haven't had to do it before.

We eventually sat and talked about it and I made it clear it wasn't acceptable and I wasn't picking his stuff up. If he does leave stuff now I pile it in a corner, then he goes mad because he can't find anything. Slowly he is learning.

Gemsgalore

My OH would be delighted to find all his stuff piled in a corner.....in fact his 'version' of tidying up means exactly that!!

ameliarate

Gemsgalore wrote: »

My OH would be delighted to find all his stuff piled in a corner.....in fact his 'version' of tidying up means exactly that!!

well at least it is tidy and out of your way.

Bethankim

I dont have an OH..well did till recently..so single woman here

Im messy, i make sure the essential areas are done but i live in a muddle of clutter most of the time. My ExOH was a neat freak and we drove each other mad..

I blitz when it drives me mad, but to be honest my room my mess..possibly if i ever manage to get a man over my threshold i will tidy up..:D but as its just me, i know where everything is..

I do find im better when i live with a tidier person, and i cook so someone else washes up..its all about balance. I couldnt live with somene who never cleans the loo, but a bit of clutter dones't bother me..

ninky_2

it's not a man thing it's all to do with how you were brought up and what you were taught to do as a child. if men are messy it's because they learnt this was okay when they were young.

my OH is super tidy. he grew up with him and four brothers, parents and for some years a grandma all living and sleeping in one room so they had to be mega tidy. when he cooks he cleans as he goes (including vegetable peelings going straight in the bin, worksurfaces wiped etc). he also had to do compulsory military service for 2 years and that teaches attention to detail, keeping your stuff in order etc.

i grew up in a messy home and whilst i consider myself fairly tidy (well i am compared to my parents), i'm messy compared to my OH. i'll leave clothes on the floor and papers piled on my desk and don't mind if the washing up is left until the morning.

mummy_Jay

gabyjane wrote: »

This morning as an example i have come downstairs and found the following:

• 2 blankets on the sofa thrown either on the floor or just screwed up where he had been sat
• The coffee jar in the middle of the worktop with lid off and dirty spoon next to it
• The washing has been piled high on the airer..i have no idea how the clothes are supposed to ever dry left like they are..not to mention they are going to be so creased i will spend hours doing that.
• His rubbish all over the desk, cigarette papers, sweet wrappers, wires left out, dirty mug
• Clothes all over the floor in the bedroom from last night

I could go on but am really tired of it. To me they are small things yet they make my life a pain in the bum as seem to be running round after him all the time doing stupid little things..i try to bite my tongue and not say anything as get a sarcastic reply or he gets in a mood and does it..who knows how he will react..
His clothes i have taken to not washing anymore to which i know he is finding a pain as the washing basket is piled high with just his stuff!
The rest id'e love to leave but work from home and if any of my parents walked in and saw the mess id'e be so embarrased.,plus the thing that REALLY annoys me is he does know how to tidy as will do when friends come round and his clothes for going policing are 'sacred' and he gets in a mood if i move them from their place..sigh

Making him out to be awful and he's not just..lazy! so is your bloke just a man or expects you to be a slave?

Have you considered getting him a reward chart?

Karen_30

I think my OH and I are equally as messy as each other in different ways and one thing will wind me up more so than him and vice versa - just depends on the people I guess. We balance each other out for instance I work from home so happy to pop a wash load on etc as always here, he's not but does the things I hate doing like cleaning the loo, packing away the food shopping, sorting paperwork etc. We don't have this you do this and I do that, just do what is needed to be done and by whoever gets to doing it first.

*Louise*

You know, my OH does things that drive me to distraction....leaving his stuff in the middle of the floor, dumping clothes, waiting a week to do things I have asked him to, etc etc.

But he's not lazy, he works hard...I think he just doesn't THINK about the stuff. He can't read my mind, so doesn't realise it will annoy me. To him if it looks tidy, then it's 'clean' and he is happy with that.

On the other hand, there are times I can come home and he has done all the dishes, and perhaps moved the sofas to clean under them......so it's not like he never does anything.

I just appreciate the stuff he does do and keep trying to point out the 'wrong' stuff without nagging.:cool: