Miscarriage support

claire16c

Sam I have the same issue with the scan room too. This time when we were sat there I was trying so hard not to cry, then I saw the woman who told us the bad news last time & I just prayed we'd not have her and would go in a different room as I think there's maybe 5 or 6. Thankfully we did.

Now I have the same worries about the 20 week one. I think I might actually ask to go in a different room if we got asked in there but feel like I can't because apts are tight, they might say no anyway. And if we got that woman I can't really say sorry I don't want you. I feel like such a drama queen. None of those things will affect any outcome but it's just a horrible memory.

DH of course didn't even recognise her! I said how can you not & he said well I have to make more room in my head for new stuff I don't remember everything. Ooh to be a man would be good sometimes!

claire16c

My poor friend is still having her miscarriage she's been bleeding at home for 2 weeks now with terrible pain etc unfortunately for her an erpc wasn't an option due to medical reasons, it makes me grateful I had the choice as even though I was terrified, it was over and done with quickly.

msb5262

So sorry to hear about your friend, Claire - at least you can offer her genuine sympathy and understanding. It must be hard you being pregnant around her, but I think the fact that you are pregnant again will give her hope for her chances in the future.

Hope everyone is feeling fairly ok this evening

MsB x

claire16c

msb5262 wrote: »

So sorry to hear about your friend, Claire - at least you can offer her genuine sympathy and understanding. It must be hard you being pregnant around her, but I think the fact that you are pregnant again will give her hope for her chances in the future.

Hope everyone is feeling fairly ok this evening

MsB x

The 'good' thing is we live a couple of hours apart so all communication is by text so she's not got to see me which I think is best. I also try to avoid talking about my pregnancy but she did say that herself actually about having hope plus she's knows I've been through it myself so I guess it's easier to be happy for me than if I was just pregnant and no understanding of her experience.

Air_Cooled_75

Hello ladies, sorry I haven't posted for a while and I'm genuinely sorry for all your losses.

Had the meeting with the consultant, they didn't test the placenta so we aren't any wiser there. They have recognised that as a failing and are changing there procedures as a result. Doesn't help us but at least it will help others.

If I get pregnant again I will have extra scans and consultant apts.

I'm not sure I want to though.
x

please-let-me-be-lucky

Oh no Air Cooled that's rubbish that you are no further forward! Were they supposed to test the placenta and didn't or did they never intend to?

I know what you mean about not being sure if you want to try again. I'm going through the same thoughts at the moment. I feel like 4 lost babies are enough. Might feel differently after I see the consultant on Wed. Hugs to you.

Claire I hope your friend gets through this ok. Is she unable to have medical management too?

s0237276

Thank you so much for all the support/advice....it's hard when you don't really have anyone to talk to about this kind of thing.. Good to hear how some of you have gone onto conceive afterwards too. I've been ff work this week and heading back in on Monday, kind of dreading people asking me why I've been off as are planning on keeping it quiet. I work as a teacher and the staff, and kids, tend to be quite nosey. Was given a sick note to sign me off until the end of next week but I think I'd like to try to get back to normality ASAP.

claire16c

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

Oh no Air Cooled that's rubbish that you are no further forward! Were they supposed to test the placenta and didn't or did they never intend to?

I know what you mean about not being sure if you want to try again. I'm going through the same thoughts at the moment. I feel like 4 lost babies are enough. Might feel differently after I see the consultant on Wed. Hugs to you.

Claire I hope your friend gets through this ok. Is she unable to have medical management too?

I think because it started by itself they didn't suggest the medical management although it would have sped it up and she would have been in a hospital so I think it would have been better however I'm not sure if it would have been suitable either as she has an abnormality with her uterus.

It is odd though as at my hospital it was either the erpc or go home they didn't even offer it, I didn't ask because I didn't want it but it made me wonder why everywhere is so different.

please-let-me-be-lucky

s0237276 I hope all goes well with going back tomorrow.

Claire I was told that after 10 weeks post mc there is an infection risk so they only let me try to mc naturally for about 5 weeks then wanted me to do the medical management. When that didn't work I had to have the ERPC at about 8 weeks post mc.

I was at a major teaching hospital, don't know if that made a difference or if it's a funding thing? Xx

claire16c

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

s0237276 I hope all goes well with going back tomorrow.

Claire I was told that after 10 weeks post mc there is an infection risk so they only let me try to mc naturally for about 5 weeks then wanted me to do the medical management. When that didn't work I had to have the ERPC at about 8 weeks post mc.

I was at a major teaching hospital, don't know if that made a difference or if it's a funding thing? Xx

She's been at home for 2 weeks I think now, and she discovered she was miscarrying by bleeding so perhaps it's not offered that soon unless not much is coming out? I know she has to have a scan in a few days to check it's come out so maybe it's an option after that if it hasnt.

Whereas it guess if you have a missed miscarriage they might be more likely to suggest it to get it started - although they didn't with me.

I suspected a funding/bed issue too as going home is free/no beds. Erpc I'm assuming costs the most but you're out in a day case whereas I guess with medical you probably need to stay in & requires frequent attention by a nurse etc.

I was too scared of uncontrollable pain/bleeding at home and I wish for my friend the erpc was an option because it's sounds just horrendous.