Miscarriage support

budget_budd

I want to give you a big hug fran-o, :grouphug: I totally understand where you are coming from, I am happy for them too, but I really hope its not going to be front page news everyday... I can already see the headlines tomorrow.

You are doing amazingly well to be at work xxx It must be very hard for you, I still can't face it, although I am feeling a bit better in myself today (well until faced with all the pregnancy news).

Take care of yourself

fran-o

thanks budget budd, Im not doing too bad really. I'm lucky that my boss (who knows my situation) has been really good about it all, and that most others at work don't know at all - so I can 'just get on with it' at work.
I hope I didn't sound too mean in my post earlier - I do really wish them all the best (I'm a bit of a fan and met them last year at a charity do!) and empathise with her having to do this in public. I'm just feeling a bit sorry for myself!!

please-let-me-be-lucky

I'm not doing very well today. Ended up back at hospital after a huge blood loss containing clots, 6 days after evac and almost 9 weeks after the whole saga began(see previous posts). At one point they were going to admit me and put me on IV antibiotics but after several tests they decided I could go home and continue with the antibiotics I'm already on.

There was lots of waiting around at the hospital and we could hear the people in the next cubicle screaming and shouting. They were very chavvy, but I felt sorry for the woman as she was obviously in a lot of pain and, as she was in the cubicle I'd been in for the medical management, I assumed she was doing the same after a miscarriage. It later transpired that she was there for an abortion and it broke my heart. I then heard things I will never forget, but the nurses were good enough to move me away.

I can't stop crying. It seems so cruel that all of our babies were taken away and other people choose to get rid of theirs. I'm well aware I don't know all the ins and outs behind a decision like that, but the way they were going on was horrific, saying how '!!!! the service was' in the hospital. I felt like bursting into their room and giving them a piece of my mind.

And then there's the famous baby news. I too am thrilled for them but devastated for me. I should be having a 20 week scan next week .

I'm trying to stay positive, especially as I realise how lucky I am to already have 2 children but it all seems too much just now Xx

MrsDavo

Hi Ladies,

I wish I had come here to vent rather than venting to my friends about the announcement of Kate and Wills. I am very happy for them of course, but so so sad for me at the same time.

All my friends say " Your time will come" "Think positive it will happen eventually" When they say things like that it makes me feel worse! It was my time, in February - I had a MMC in April. I had my time and it was cruelly taken away from me, after trying for 13 months.

Now we have been trying since then and after pushing the doctors to do a blood test ( They said wait another year ) they now strongly suspect I have PCOS - I go for the scan on Thursday night. With that looming over me I had hoped my friends would be a little more understanding - but how can they - when they have never lost a child, and have 2-4 each and have had them when and how they wanted them!

I am sorry for all the losses on here, I don't post very often at all but I do come by from time to time and see how everyone is.

:-(

please-let-me-be-lucky

Hugs Mrs Davo and good luck for the scan. I have 2 friends with PCOS and both eventually managed to have 2 children each, so I have everything crossed it will be the same for you.

In the meantime, vent away! It's always best in the company of those who understand Xx

budget_budd

Fran-o I didn't think you sounded mean at all in your post, and lucky you meeting the royals. I am jealous. Your workplace sounds very supportive which is what you need.

Please-let-me-be-lucky it sounds like you have really been through it, I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you at the hospital. Like you I remind myself that I am very lucky to have my 2, they keep me going.

MrsDavo feel free to vent away, I am finding it theraputic, like please-let-me-be-lucky said I also have a friend with PCOS and she has 2 now, it can take time but it does happen. I hope the scan goes well for you x

I actually cried in the car on the school run today when they started talking about odds on the baby's name, it just made me feel so sad that I have no idea whether my lost babies are boys or girls so they don't have names. That doesn't feel right.
I have successfully managed to avoid newspapers today and I might avoid the TV later so that should be ok.

and I can only echo what Metranil Vavin said

Let's just hope nothing goes wrong for her.

She's not even 12 weeks and the whole world knows.

She faces the same challenges we all have here, only it is under the spotlight <shudder>

shelley_crow

Huge hugs to you Budget Budd, you're not on your own there. I hope you're ok.

It's great for them but not so good for us! She would have been about a month behind me if everything hadn't gone wrong. I'm going back to the hospital for another scan tomorrow to make sure everything has been passed. I think it has, the bleeding stopped last week.

Why is it that it seems much harder at this time of year? I'm throwing myself into the Christmas thing just as a distraction really.

OH is skirting around asking whether we will be trying again, I don't know at the moment. I'd like to but I don't think I could cope with this again.

lilymay1

shelley_crow wrote: »

OH is skirting around asking whether we will be trying again, I don't know at the moment. I'd like to but I don't think I could cope with this again.

Hi Shelley,

I just wanted to ask, do you have already have children?

For me, the pain of everything I went through was worth the joy my son has brought me. I knew I wanted to start trying again straight away because having another baby was the only way I could of trying to fill the massive hole in my life.

I'm sorry, I don't know your story, but I just wanted to say it does get easier.

Take care

Lily xxx

shelley_crow

lilymay1 wrote: »

Hi Shelley,

I just wanted to ask, do you have already have children?

For me, the pain of everything I went through was worth the joy my son has brought me. I knew I wanted to start trying again straight away because having another baby was the only way I could of trying to fill the massive hole in my life.

I'm sorry, I don't know your story, but I just wanted to say it does get easier.

Take care

Lily xxx

Hi Lily,

I have two children already, this was going to be our third and final x

SusanC_2

please-let-me-be-lucky wrote: »

I'm trying to stay positive, especially as I realise how lucky I am to already have 2 children but it all seems too much just now Xx

I'm sorry to hear about your awful experience in hospital. Yes, you are lucky to have two children already but I don't think that takes away from your loss in any way - there does seem to be a cultural expectation that it should somehow be easier but it isn't.