Miscarriage support

FairyShazza

It does hurt when you see other people who are pregnant. Just a few weeks ago someone I know announced on Facebook they are expecting and put up their scan pictures – as much I was very happy for them I also was seething with jealousy thinking “that should’ve been us” and I hate feeling jealous of anyone as it is such an ugly emotion

The one thing that I read on another forum I go on which has been a great help since our mmc was that when you see other people who are pregnant, or hear of friends family that are expecting you should try and remember that you don’t necessarily know what that person has been through in the past. They could have had a mc themselves previously, or had trouble conceiving you just don’t know – I have found that has helped me deal with seeing and hearing these things a lot more easily.

The tie I have trouble is when I hear stories of people mistreating their children or having children when they don’t really want them (for whatever reason). That is when I do think it is unfair as there are so many people who want children and would be great parents but are struggling or unable to have them that it seems very unfair that people who blatantly don’t want them and then mistreat them can.

I never saw the programme about the woman with the 8 children but have heard about it and I just think how ungrateful. I wouldn’t care what sex our baby was as long as it was healthy.

Some people just don’t understand what others go through in life.

Metranil_Vavin

I quite agree fairy..particularly when you see some of the scumbags on things like the Jeremy Kyle show who seem to pop kids out willy nilly and not be bothered about them at all :mad:

I'm back at work today and I'm struggling already

Really can't be ar5ed with anything that's going on, and so much has happened here in the last 2 weeks I feel totally out of the loop on a lot of things.

Feel so down..also seem to have pinky discharge again when I go to the loo..what's that all about?? I haven't had any bleeding at all for over a week now.

Hope I don't have an infection or anything

ladylegs

Metranil_Vavin wrote: »

I'm back at work today and I'm struggling already

Really can't be ar5ed with anything that's going on, and so much has happened here in the last 2 weeks I feel totally out of the loop on a lot of things.

Feel so down..also seem to have pinky discharge again when I go to the loo..what's that all about?? I haven't had any bleeding at all for over a week now.

Hope I don't have an infection or anything

MV, is there any way you can do some work at home?? Can you talk to someone about how you are feeling in confidence and /or go back to the docs.
My doc said that indications of infection are fever and foul smelling discharge.

tinkwings

Metranil_Vavin wrote: »

I quite agree fairy..particularly when you see some of the scumbags on things like the Jeremy Kyle show who seem to pop kids out willy nilly and not be bothered about them at all :mad:

I'm back at work today and I'm struggling already

Really can't be ar5ed with anything that's going on, and so much has happened here in the last 2 weeks I feel totally out of the loop on a lot of things.

Feel so down..also seem to have pinky discharge again when I go to the loo..what's that all about?? I haven't had any bleeding at all for over a week now.

Hope I don't have an infection or anything

Sending hugs MV I went into work for 3 hours this morning felt like i was getting evils from my boss and felt really uncomfortable. But I just got my head down and cleared my desk. I am still signed off so should not have gone in really but felt really guilty.

Metranil_Vavin

tinks - how long have you been signed off for in total?

I wasn't actually signed off by my GP, I just told work that I wouldn't be in for the week following the diagnosis of my MC. They hadn't actually contacted me about when I was coming back etc, I just took it on my self to come back today.

Ladylegs in theory I have everything I need to work from home: laptop, connection to work server, blackberry etc, however my company do not have a 'working from home' policy!!!! It's completely crazy, but there you go.

I daresay if I was desperate they wouldn't mind, but with redundancies etc happening as we speak, I'm too scared to highlight myself in anyway

Going to see what the hospital says on Weds..I'm praying that I don't have to have anything surgical done. I'm terrified of anesthetic

Haven't bled at all for over a week and havent noticed any funny smells, but getting a lot of discharge today and also a bit of pink when I wiped after going to the loo earlier.

FairyShazza

MV - I think the spotting is quite normal even. I have read lots of people experience the same thing. The signs of infection would be a bad smell and funny coloured discharge - as they would be anyway if they occured without it being as a result of mc.

It is very difficult going back to work so if you are struggling and can talk to someone about how you are feeling it could be helpful. I was signed off for a month after our mmc and I was glad I had the extra time to get over what had happened.

tinkwings

Metranil_Vavin wrote: »

tinks - how long have you been signed off for in total? 3 Weeks so far in total this is my third week & due to see doctor again on Thursday. I think signed off as still testing + and beling quite low.

I wasn't actually signed off by my GP, I just told work that I wouldn't be in for the week following the diagnosis of my MC. They hadn't actually contacted me about when I was coming back etc, I just took it on my self to come back today.

Ladylegs in theory I have everything I need to work from home: laptop, connection to work server, blackberry etc, however my company do not have a 'working from home' policy!!!! It's completely crazy, but there you go.

I daresay if I was desperate they wouldn't mind, but with redundancies etc happening as we speak, I'm too scared to highlight myself in anyway - Fingers Crossed for you that all is fine x

Going to see what the hospital says on Weds..I'm praying that I don't have to have anything surgical done. I'm terrified of anesthetic

Haven't bled at all for over a week and havent noticed any funny smells, but getting a lot of discharge today and also a bit of pink when I wiped after going to the loo earlier.

I had brown old blood last week and have had nothing for the last 4 days. DH & i DTD at the weekend which was fine and have not used any protection what will be will be. I have decided that I want to loose at least 7 Lbs before our blessing in April so trying to focus on that and BD just for fun! x

QQuaver

MERFE wrote: »

us mums never forget, even this year I remembered the baby I'd lost and that they would have been a year old this christmas but I was able to deal with it as a it would have been lovely but wasnt meant to be.

Thanks for your reply:) (Since I never became a mum, I don't feel like a mum, I wish I was a mummy:o)

MERFE

sorry quaver - I already consider you a mum

What Makes A Mother
I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today,
I asked, "What makes a Mother?"
And I know I heard him say:
A Mother has a baby,
This we know is true
But, God, can you be a mother
When your baby's not with you?

Yes, you can, he replied
With confidence in his voice,
I give many women babies,
When they leave it is not their choice.
Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for the day,
And some I send to feel your womb,
But there's no need to stay.

I just don't understand this God,
I want my baby here.

He took a breath,
and cleared his throat,
And then I saw a tear.
I wish I could show you,
What your child is doing Here...

If you could see your child smile
With other children and say,
"We go to earth to learn our lessons
of love and life and fear,
but My mommy loved me so much
I got to come straight here!"
I feel so lucky to have a Mom who had so much love for me,
I learned my lessons very quickly,
My Mommy set me free.
I miss my Mommy oh so much
But I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillow is where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear,
"Mommy, Please don't be sad today,
I'm your baby and I am here"

So you see my dear sweet one,
Your children are okay.
Your babies are here in My home,
And this is where they'll stay.
They'll wait for you with Me,
Until your lessons there are through,
And on the day that you come home,
they'll be at the gates waiting for you

So now you see
What makes a Mother,
It's the feeling in your heart,
It's the love you had so much of
Right from the very start.

Author Unknown

QQuaver

MERFE wrote: »

sorry quaver - I already consider you a mum

Thank you for the poem MERFE, I've copied it to keep.
It made my eyes tear up though:o