How to deal with a child who has mental health issues.

mrcow

stef240377 wrote: »

I dont believe i said he had tried to hang himself at all i said strangle i at no time said how the attempted to this.

Do you think that this makes a difference?

jackieglasgow

I think that was out of line

mrcow

jackieglasgow wrote: »

I think that was out of line

In what way.


Do any of you here have any experience of dealing with suicide? Seriously? I can tell you I have. This is no walk in the park here. These are young kids we are talking about here. Impressionable, vunerable and by definition secretive.

stef240377

mrcow wrote: »

Do you think that this makes a difference?

Actually i do as you have more personal control over strangulation than you do over hanging.

jackieglasgow

I think it was disrespectful to the OP. Whether or not I have experience of suicide is nothing to do with it, but actually I do. I also happen to know that the method used by those attempting suicide also indicates the seriousness of the intent, and that someone who attempts to hang themself is more likely to be determined to kill themselves, rather than "crying for help", and the OP does not need anyone, you or I, remarking on what method her son used, what his intent was, or why. The fact that he made an attempt is serious enough. I do not wish this to turn into some sort of argument between you and I, and simply wanted to point out that on this occasion your honesty was inappropriate, in my opinion.

Bethankim

Hi Steph,

I havent read all the thrad yet but just wanted to say i understand how your feeling,well some of it. and to hopefully give you a bit of light

Last may my 15 year old went off the rails big time, he was self harming, suicidal manic, then low all sorts, and the tipping point was when he came home totally manic, talking so fast he was almost unintelligible, then ran off an hour alter a friend rang and he was catatonic - i worte everything down as a big list..just bullet points. from a year and all significant things that had happened.

saw a GP who actually listened and got a CAHM's referal within 72 hours - he was assesesed and over a couple of months of seeing the psychiatrist an now nurse specialist were able to get a clear picture. he wasnt admitted at any point.

I had to make him as safe as i could..ikept very calm at all times and set rules.
i made him aware that he was ill, well he knew it and that as his mum i would keep him as safe as possible.

he went awol lots - so we agreed 4 safe places he would go to and if he couldnt ring he had to respond ot a text or i would inform the police within 2 hours.
i had access t FB, phone etc
if he wasnt feeling safe he was to tell me, many many times i talked him down, watched helplessly ad he once again ran off..
i used the support offered, if i was ever worried i could ring his nurse specialist and she would get him in asap - normally within a day
he self harmed loads and depsite me trying to get him safe, i couldnt watch him 24 hours a day..if he did anything we dealt with it calmly and off the A&E

I really feel for you, its a very hard place to be and its about keeping strong, calm and setting some very firm boundaries.

but it does and can get better, he was close to being diagnosed as Bi Polar, but actually has axiety driven depression - the medication works, he has a new groupof friends who are not in drugs or drink and care about him, he is no longer in school and sadly will leve with no gcse's but he will go to college, the happy generally self assured young man in remerging..

stay strong feel free to pm me, take all the advice and support you can ther eis precious little for parents or carers.
don get into playing detective i did to be honest it was wasted effort, i stuck with it via sessions and we made rules - no matter how hard be strong for him..but also accept you cannot watch him 24hours a day..

sorry for waflfing on - He will get there and sometimes a crisis means its possible to move forward, he needs ot know he isnt insane and he is loved above everything else

Indie_Kid

Bethankim wrote: »

he wasnt admitted at any point.

Admitting someone to hospital is a last resort.

stef240377

Thanks, had a momentary brainwave and rung up the gp to check they had updated our medical records with phone numbers etc, lucky i did as they have only done mine and my husbands and not the childrens so now they are on the phone to CAHMS to chase it up. Would have felt worse than i do now if i had waited days for a response and they couldnt contact me.

Bethankim

Im well aware of that, i was trying to get a balance about the reality of having a teenager in a very bad place..but from my perspective as mum - i was very worried about how things worked..my experience is that people with knowledge on the inside of the system assume that people accessing it know how it works..

but that is a whole other topic and thread. I hope Steph you get the support you need to support you son

stef240377

Am going to write down now what has actually gone over time and make sure i have it to hand when we get to CAHMS. As i am aware apps will be limited time and there will be too much information to get out otherwise and this way i will be least likely to forget something that i may see as trivial and could be seen as a major catalyst.