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Please help - about to tell my daughter about her father
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Best wishes. You may find she's not as surprised as you expect her to be. But she will be very upset..................
....I'm smiling because I have no idea what's going on ...:)
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good luck, my experience was that it all worked out in the end. lots of hugs to all of you'We're not here for a long time, we're here for a good time0
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OP, I couldn't read and run. Something very similar happened to me, I found out when I was 16 that the man who had brought me up wasn't my biological father. It's all a very complicated and messy story and I couldn't begin to try and explain it all clearly here.
PLEASE tell your daughter asap. Don't put it off any longer. I was very angry with my mum for not telling me sooner and even more angry that she had done it to protect my step-father's feelings. I don't want to scare you and everyone is different but it didn't have a happy ending for me and my mum:(:o The whole family was and still is very split over it.
Thankfully now I have built up a relationship of sorts with my own dad but it has taken a LOT of years for that to happen.
I hope everything works out for you and your family.:A:dance:Mash p'tater, mash p'tater:dance:0 -
Rockfan, if anything, this thread will show you and your daughter if you wish to share it with her, that the situation is not that unusual and there are other people out there who are going / have gone through the same thing - and come out the other side still in one piece.
I've been thinking about your daughter today, and will continue to send you both my love. XIt's what is inside your head that matters in life - not what's outside your windowEvery worthwhile accomplishment, big or little, has its stages of drudgery and triumph; a beginning, a struggle and a victory. - Ghandi0 -
I have told her.....She didn't have the faintest idea, we are going to talk about the details tomorrow when we are both calmer but she clung to me telling me she loves me and understands why I didn't tell her sooner. I clung to her too and we cried and hugged. My poor little girl, I hope she can forgive me xxx!0
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she will forgive you, might take a short while, might be instant but she will, you did what you did for all the right reasons. hugs again to both of you'We're not here for a long time, we're here for a good time0
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I have told her.....She didn't have the faintest idea, we are going to talk about the details tomorrow when we are both calmer but she clung to me telling me she loves me and understands why I didn't tell her sooner. I clung to her too and we cried and hugged. My poor little girl, I hope she can forgive me xxx!
Well done. I'm so glad you found the strength to tell her. You've done the right thing keep it going by letting her ask as many questions as she wants and tell her the truth no matter how uncomfortable it is. It's the lies and deceit that is hurtful not the actual events surrounding it all.:dance:Mash p'tater, mash p'tater:dance:0 -
Well done for getting straight to it!Hi, we’ve had to remove your signature. If you’re not sure why please read the forum rules or email the forum team if you’re still unsure - MSE ForumTeam0
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Well done. I hope it all works out for you xxOnly dead fish go with the flow...0
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I have told her.....She didn't have the faintest idea, we are going to talk about the details tomorrow when we are both calmer but she clung to me telling me she loves me and understands why I didn't tell her sooner. I clung to her too and we cried and hugged. My poor little girl, I hope she can forgive me xxx!
Just had a quick read of your thread sounds like you have a good relationship and im sure everything will be fine. I will one day have to do this too, i had my little girl when i was 18 and the real dad wasn't intrested so i didn't push it and met my current boyfriend when she was 4 months old and he has brought her up as his own since then, she's now 4 and has a half sister in the next village and they will probably end up at the same school so im going to have to think very carefully about when i tell her.
I've also been on the receiving end, my mum and dad told me i was adopted when i was around 8. When your not expecting it it really is a breathtaking shock and takes a long time to sink in, personally i felt i was too young when my parents told me, i became quite obssesed with it and guess i never really felt the same until i found and contacted my 'real' parents last year. I think that closed it for me because although they are lovely and im glad i have contact with them, i mostly learnt that blood doesn't really mean anything at all its all about the people that love you and are there to bring you up and support you wether there a biological parent or not.
Your situation isn't quite as complicated as mine so hopefully when the dusts settled and she's asked all her questions it won't change anything.
Anyone can make a baby but it takes a man to be a Dad, even more so when the situation isn't quite perfect.0
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