Some advice please, what would you do?

Zazen999

evian1 wrote: »

they can't do anything unless he is willing to co-operate. I just don't know what to do anymore? What would you do?

Can't they section him if he gets worse? If he has history then the doctor should be giving you better advice than this. Did you explain accurately what he has said and how he is behaving?

You asked what we would do. I wouldn't hesitate to get out today and get the kids to mum's house. No question.

And I totally agree with Wicked Witch; a very strange thing for someone to say.

paddy's_mum

Spot on, Wicked Witch! It is yet another aspect of a volatile and dangerous situation .. you won't get any flaming from me. My view of your post is Well Said.

Money_maker

Absolutely endorse all the previous posts.

If this paranoia makes him doubt his own parentage to your kids then I shudder to think of what he may do to them to hurt you, particularly if he thinks you are 'lying scum' and wants you to get what you 'deserve'.

About time you put yourself and your babies first. Then you can speak to him when he has a calm day about how he has been behaving and how you can seek help together.

evian1

I don't know who else to ring though, when I rang the doctor and explained what was happening he suggested I might need a marriage councillor. I could never get him sectioned! he is always saying that because he has past mental issues it would be easy for me to get him sectioned, all i'd need to do was get a few people to back me up on what I tell the doctor. he is being treated for schizophrenia. Maybe he does need he medication looking at.

Errata

It sounds like he is living in his own reality, which bears no relation to reality.
The first and most urgent step is to speak to his GP immediately. Things will fall into place from there, but it's really important that the children are safe - whatever that might entail.

aliasojo

evian1 wrote: »

I don't know who else to ring though, when I rang the doctor and explained what was happening he suggested I might need a marriage councillor. I could never get him sectioned! he is always saying that because he has past mental issues it would be easy for me to get him sectioned, all i'd need to do was get a few people to back me up on what I tell the doctor. he is being treated for schizophrenia. Maybe he does need he medication looking at.

Just a thought but are you certain he's taking his meds...and the right amount?

Something has clearly changed. This isn't a Relate issue it's a health issue....consult a different Doctor.

Blackpool_Saver

Does he have a visiting CPN? do you have a number to call in crisis?

If he is on meds for schizophrenia he will have a psychiatrist, where do they reside? call the community mental health team.

belfastgirl23

Agree with alisajo. I have very limited knowledge on this but a good friend's brother is schizophrenic and this sounds exactly like how he is when he's come off his meds. I think you need to ring the doctor and tell him that you believe you and the children are in danger from your husband and tell him that you will be following up with a letter so that if anything happens it will be clear the responsibility is his. This should get some action.

Your husband not recognising that he is ill is a common issue with people who suffer from schizophrenia btw and should definitely NOT be a reason for a doctor not to intervene, particularly if he has already been diagnosed.

I know that this is designed for people with schizophrenia themselves rather than carers but I think it might be worth giving this organisation a call to see if they can help you with the doctor issue

http://www.sane.org.uk/AboutMentalIllness/NeedHelpNow

To me your doc has been negligent in their advice to you..

msb5262

Dear evian1,
I think all the replies you have had so far are absolutely right.
This situation sounds very frightening and potentially extremely dangerous for you, your children and for your OH.

I can't believe your GP's reaction - marriage counselling???

PLEASE make an urgent appointment with the GP surgery and give them a detailed account of exactly what is happening. Make notes beforehand so you don't leave anything out. In your position, I would refuse to leave the surgery until the GP was able to tell me what action they propose taking.

If you feel anxious about this, take someone with you - friend, relative, whoever - to support you. You are entitled to do this. Also make notes of what is said.

Don't forget mental illness is an illness - your poor OH is almost certainly suffering a great deal and his illness needs to be addressed, for his own good as much as anyone's.

You clearly feel you will be betraying your OH if you take any action to try to get him some help - I don't want to alarm you but it sounds as if your whole family could be in grave danger.

Please take action as soon as possible.

Best wishes,
MsB

maggied_2

Where's my reply gone??

Grr - anyway to summarise, your GP doesn't appear to be taking this matter very seriously. If he won't help (marriage guidance.....honestly) can you contact MIND http://www.mind.org.uk/help and get some advice there?

I'm concerned with what you've told us that you and your children are potentially in danger. He is clearly paranoid and deluded which shows that his medication isn't working correctly.

It certainly does sound as though either he isn't taking his meds or that they need to be adjusted.

Please take yourself and your children out of harm's way. If this is an episode which can be medicated then I am sure he will forgive you.

Good luck C xx

ETA - sorry, cross posted with several people.