Stay at home mums getting organised in 2010

kidcat

Good luck ragz.

jenkins3563

Hi there

I would like to join your group. I am a mum to 2 ds's who are 3 months and 2 years old and I am currently on maternity leave.

I love the idea of being a SAHM and just wondered how you guys do it ie financially becuase that is the only thing holding me back really. My husband works full time as a bus driver and his wage is ok but nothing spectacular and at the moment being a SAHM is just a pipe dream for me but I'd be interested to find out how you guys cope.

kidcat

Hi jenkins3563,

I have always been a SAHM since my eldest was born, (I turned down several very highly paid jobs while pregnant and on maternity leave - when I think about the salaries now its more than my OH earns now - 15 years later!!) I chose it due to family situation and difficulties and after that as my other kids were born and other things came up with the kids its just kind of stuck. So realistically we have never had two salaries to rely on so we have learnt to live with one wage. I always feel it must be tremendously hard if you are used to two salaries to suddenly drop to one and I am not sure how people do it.

You have to do whats right for you as a family

sillybillyme

morning all :j

going to stay in today i think as ds2 is at pre school all day and i dont need to go anywhere and i dont want to spend any money!!!

todays list

[STRIKE]tidy ds1 bedroom[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]tidy ds2 bedroom[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]hoover upstairs[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]polish upstairs[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]wash up[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]put washing on[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]clean kitchen[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]dry washing[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]wipe over dining table[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]tidy lounge[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]sweep downstairs[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]clean bathroom[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]phone council[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]cancel physio appointment[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]email ebay[/STRIKE]

thought i might aswell get general cleaning done today if im going to stay in

xxx

sillybillyme

finished my list till the kids get home and turn the house upside down again so going to pop to a friends for a cup of tea!!!!
so much for staying in!!!!

xxx

kidcat

My kist for today is nearly done too

[STRIKE]Wash dishes
Washing x 4
Hang out wet wash x4[/STRIKE]
[STRIKE]DW
Tidy liv rm, din rm[/STRIKE] and kitchen
Organise meals
[STRIKE]Prep tomorrow clothes
Ikea
Pay party fees
Tesco[/STRIKE]
Wash kitchen floor
[STRIKE]Change cat litter
Walk dog[/STRIKE]

ragz_2

jenkins3563 wrote: »

Hi there

I would like to join your group. I am a mum to 2 ds's who are 3 months and 2 years old and I am currently on maternity leave.

I love the idea of being a SAHM and just wondered how you guys do it ie financially becuase that is the only thing holding me back really. My husband works full time as a bus driver and his wage is ok but nothing spectacular and at the moment being a SAHM is just a pipe dream for me but I'd be interested to find out how you guys cope.

I think a lot of people daren't be SAHMs as they are afraid of not being able to sustain the lifestyle they've become accustomed to. Luckily I've always been really poor so it doesn't bother me at all, plus I would only be able to earn a pittance if I went to work, which would then have to pay for childcare for some stranger to bring my kids up for me, which seems pointless. Quality time with parents is more importmant to small children than their parents having a lot of money!

We manage fine as Dh doesn't earn a lot yet so we get £190 a week tax credits, £185 a month child benefit and £650 a month LHA. I know this means we're living off the state (shock horror, tie to me to a stake and burn me!) but if I went to work I'd have to claim tax credits for childcare anyway so I figure it evens out.

my sil has been a nanny for a lot of rich people but she's always said when she has her own kids she'll be a SAHM even if they have to struggle as it's better for the kids.

Anyway, that's my tuppence worth lol

money_saving_diva

jenkins3563 wrote: »

Hi there

I would like to join your group. I am a mum to 2 ds's who are 3 months and 2 years old and I am currently on maternity leave.

I love the idea of being a SAHM and just wondered how you guys do it ie financially becuase that is the only thing holding me back really. My husband works full time as a bus driver and his wage is ok but nothing spectacular and at the moment being a SAHM is just a pipe dream for me but I'd be interested to find out how you guys cope.

Hi and welcome!
My hubby earns an ok wage (I would say just above average) and we have nice things, 2 cars etc. BUT I use to earn a good wage too (over 20k) we sorted out moving/new mortage when I was earning and moved into a family home to do us hopefully for the rest of our lives. We were careful to make sure we got somewhere we could afford just on hubbys wage. We worked out what we spend and where by doing a spreadsheet. We disscussed what we thought we spent and then looked at the truth. It was different to what we thought. We found we took money out cash points more than we thought, hubby was suprised how much I spent at hairdressers stuff like that. It made us think about what we had to change. We started making changes before baby came and my wages went in to a savings account not to be touched so we had a few months to get use to the new amount of money coming in. I am being honest now but we don't really do anything different to the way we live when we were on 2 wages - still have nights out, holiday, 2 cars, etc and I don't know what we ever did with my wages! :eek: It makes me realise we could have put my wages by for years!! Ek! You just manage! - you honestly do! The only thing I can say is being a SAHM is money saving in small and big ways ....the main points I can think are that save us money:

1. No child care costs

2. Partner doesn't have to have days off when child sick etc - he never has to p*&% work off being unflexible - he works away alot and he can. Also means he is working his way up career ladder quicker (and therefore earning more and more) than I think he would if we were both working (if that makes sense)

3. I can plan meals/shopping - having time to cook from scratch - we would eat more ready type meals when both working.

4. I can shop round for insurances etc and check stuff like that (saved £100 ringing up about an insurance renewal the other day while ds had a nap) how many working mums earned £100 in 5 mins

5. I shop around for everything more now cos I have the time

but I have always wanted to be a SAHM and it was important for my dh too. We never thought about it as a finacial decision - we wanted one of us to be home for a children and we knew we would make it work finacially what ever it took. I feel very strongly about it (but can understand why some people go back to work).

ragz_2

money_saving_diva wrote: »

Hi and welcome!
My hubby earns an ok wage (I would say just above average) and we have nice things, 2 cars etc. BUT I use to earn a good wage too (over 20k) we sorted out moving/new mortage when I was earning and moved into a family home to do us hopefully for the rest of our lives. We were careful to make sure we got somewhere we could afford just on hubbys wage. We worked out what we spend and where by doing a spreadsheet. We disscussed what we thought we spent and then looked at the truth. It was different to what we thought. We found we took money out cash points more than we thought, hubby was suprised how much I spent at hairdressers stuff like that. It made us think about what we had to change. We started making changes before baby came and my wages went in to a savings account not to be touched so we had a few months to get use to the new amount of money coming in. I am being honest now but we don't really do anything different to the way we live when we were on 2 wages - still have nights out, holiday, 2 cars, etc and I don't know what we ever did with my wages! :eek: It makes me realise we could have put my wages by for years!! Ek! You just manage! - you honestly do! The only thing I can say is being a SAHM is money saving in small and big ways ....the main points I can think are that save us money:

1. No child care costs

2. Partner doesn't have to have days off when child sick etc - he never has to p*&% work off being unflexible - he works away alot and he can. Also means he is working his way up career ladder quicker (and therefore earning more and more) than I think he would if we were both working (if that makes sense)

3. I can plan meals/shopping - having time to cook from scratch - we would eat more ready type meals when both working.

4. I can shop round for insurances etc and check stuff like that (saved £100 ringing up about an insurance renewal the other day while ds had a nap) how many working mums earned £100 in 5 mins

5. I shop around for everything more now cos I have the time

but I have always wanted to be a SAHM and it was important for my dh too. We never thought about it as a finacial decision - we wanted one of us to be home for a children and we knew we would make it work finacially what ever it took. I feel very strongly about it (but can understand why some people go back to work).

Very well said and explained!

The house we went to see wasn't what we'd hoped and my car just failed MOT on 5 things :eek: so I am not a happy Ragz today. Just ate 3 biscuit bars and a bag of mini cheddars instead of breakfast/lunch. All downhill from here me thinks!

money_saving_diva

ragz wrote: »

Very well said and explained!

The house we went to see wasn't what we'd hoped and my car just failed MOT on 5 things :eek: so I am not a happy Ragz today. Just ate 3 biscuit bars and a bag of mini cheddars instead of breakfast/lunch. All downhill from here me thinks!

Sorry to hear that the house wasn't great and the car failed Have you got more houses to look at? Is the car going to be mega expensive?? :mad: You can not live without them (well I can't! he he! and I don't actually mind buses) but they are a pain in the backside when they go wrong! I did a month or two without a car during the week last year and I was lost athough I managed fine but it was really expensive getting everywhere by bus and time consuming! Fun for ds though - we often go on the bus just for a change and he loves it! I am not so sure the other passengers like the wheels on the bus being sung over and over, and him making them wave at him, and he shouts 'STOP' at traffic lights and shouts 'BEEEEP' if he hears a horn lol! He is great fun in the car but not sure some bus passengers like it

We have spent the morning in town with my best mate and her son. I need to do a few jobs now but I am feeling a bit lazy today. I have an addiction to chocolate and cake and the mo so I just ate a nice healthy salad in case I feel the need to eat a whole big bar of chocolate tonight - which I prob will cos I am going Aquanatal class.

I have had an 'issue' with our neighbours the last two days which I think I finally sorted out today. I am so glad I am in all day or at least in and out with no particular pattern or else this issue would have just got worse. To cut a long story very short - does everyone agree with me that it is very odd, and very rude to let yourself (and a builder) into your neighbours garden - climbing over side gate using a ladder and while I WAS IN and WITHOUT asking!!!? :eek: