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Help me be strong-I cant cope

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Comments

  • Lisa, I'm so sorry to hear about what he's put you through. I agree with the comments the others have made. I also think that this break-up can be the best thing that has happened to you to date, despite it being so painful now. This is your big chance. I agree about bookmarking this thread so you can look back on it.
    May all your dots fall silently to the ground.
  • Thank you again for the replys,

    I cant be long but will post later he is home and has gone straight to bed ?

    I have to delete browsing history everytime im on here.

    Thanks for the support everone
  • toniq
    toniq Posts: 29,340 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Lisa this is the first day of the rest of your life!
    If you really don't have anyone to turn to, the people on this board will help u like they have helped countless others cope with the trauma of a split,

    Just wanted to say very well done u! u r on the road to a more peaceful stable life, everything seems upside down now but will soon get sorted xxxxxxxxxx
    Happy New Year Lisa xxxx
    #JusticeForGrenfell
  • i8banks
    i8banks Posts: 24 Forumite
    lisa.m wrote: »
    Hi,

    I'm not sure what to say, my husband has left (but not moved out) and I'm devastated.

    He didn't make a good life for me so cant understand why I am finding it so hard I can barely get through the day I cant eat and have hardly drank anything, he mentally abused me for years, because of him I have no friends or family around to help, he has left me with no money, I just started standing up to him and I don't think he liked it, I got him overdrawn in the bank and I think it was his final straw-he went mad-but this is the only way I could get money from him otherwise I left penniless I got tax credits in my name in September and he didn't like that too.

    I'm now in a city with no family round for miles and there is no chance of moving-I don't want to upset our son (4) even more.

    My husband has told him mummy is bad thats why daddy left and keeps telling him daddy didn't want to go mummy made him which is heart breaking, I have brought my son up alone he never spends time with him or even talks to him.

    I don't know if it will be easier when he just takes his belongings and leaves in a way I think I don't want him to leave then in another way I think god just go already.

    I just feel like I cant go on I just want to cry so bad but cant because of my son, once he is in bed I fall apart.

    Please help?
    Know how you feel hun shame your not in gloucester we could help each other and show these wasters!
  • OK so he is still in bed I desperate to go in there and talk to him, but he doesnt listen and will start to shout and swear (which little one will hear) so I'm trying so hard to avoid that one.

    I dont know what his plans are comes in and goes to bed when he says he'll leave doesnt love me,care about me etc I really want something just to happen so I can get on with things.

    I'm in Brighton btw and dont know anyone here...
  • toniq
    toniq Posts: 29,340 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Lisa im up the road from u in Crawley xxxx

    Why not run yourself a nice bath, sort out ur lil boy then distract yourself with a movie?

    If u cant settle, maybe write a list of things u need to sort out, so if u do have a bad moment u have something to refer back to xxx
    Toni xx
    #JusticeForGrenfell
  • keep your chin also going through break up at moment also keeping reading all your replies its helped me through these dark days
  • daska
    daska Posts: 6,212 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    RISE is local to you.


    "Rise, formerly the Women’s Refuge Project, was founded in 1994 and is an independent, registered charity providing services for women, children and young people affected by domestic abuse to help them recover and reclaim their lives. Rise stands for refuge, information, support and education. Rise currently provides services in Brighton, Hove and West Sussex and every year supports over 800 women and families. Rise operates a helpline for anyone affected by domestic abuse:
    01273 622 822."
    Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants - Michael Pollan
    48 down, 22 to go
    Low carb, low oxalate Primal + dairy
    From size 24 to 16 and now stuck...
  • daska wrote: »
    RISE is local to you.


    "Rise, formerly the Women’s Refuge Project, was founded in 1994 and is an independent, registered charity providing services for women, children and young people affected by domestic abuse to help them recover and reclaim their lives. Rise stands for refuge, information, support and education. Rise currently provides services in Brighton, Hove and West Sussex and every year supports over 800 women and families. Rise operates a helpline for anyone affected by domestic abuse:
    01273 622 822."
    Good post

    lisa please call this number ASAP you will get good advise , try and do it soon
    has he not left yet ? x
    Resolve not to be poor, Whatever you have , Spend less.
  • lisa.m wrote: »
    OK so he is still in bed I desperate to go in there and talk to him, but he doesnt listen and will start to shout and swear (which little one will hear) so I'm trying so hard to avoid that one.

    I dont know what his plans are comes in and goes to bed when he says he'll leave doesnt love me,care about me etc I really want something just to happen so I can get on with things.

    I'm in Brighton btw and dont know anyone here...

    Lisa...is there any point in talking to him now , wouldn't it be beter if you just concentrated on yourself & your son now ?
    i understand that you want something to happen now so that you can get the ball rolling and move on with your life , if you can try and an possibly ring the number in the above post that would be a start. because i dont think he will leave i think it will be up to you now to make the move ( i dont mean that literally ) i just mean you will have to take it into your own hands because in my experiance he will stay and bleed you dry off any emotions and strength.

    xx
    Resolve not to be poor, Whatever you have , Spend less.
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