How do you put a baby to sleep on its own without crying?

Glamazon

JoJoB wrote: »

skintchick - with my LO I took off the side to her cot and pushed it against our bed, so she could sleep within an arms reach but still have her own sleeping space. When she stirred in the night just feeling my arm there would be enough sometimes to send her back to sleep

So wish I had bought a cot with a drop side for this very reason!
Part of the reason why we are back in the MB, I can easily soothe him by dangling my arm over the side of the bed!

Right, he's getting ratty so better go and sort him out!

liney

skintchick wrote: »

Beenie - I believe there will come a point when she simply doesn't need me for sleep any more. In the same way she won;t need me to feed her, or to change her nappy.

Your baby can't speak, so to object to anything she will cry. Getting a good nights sleep is in her best interest and it's your job to teach her how. You will not do this without some tears. You do not need to leave her to cry, but neither do you need to be rocking, holding or nursing her to sleep.

Some babies like you to rest your hand on their tummy, some like their hand or forehead stroked, or bottom patted. You need to find something that doesn't involve picking her up once she's in her cot. She will fuss, because she will want your to pick her up, which obviously conflicts with the objective.

If you expect her to magically learn how to fall to sleep without any fuss at all, then i think you are going to have to wait until the day when she suddenly decides to do it on her own, and continue your waking nights until she's 3

Frank.

We used the pick up put down method with some success. (Google it if you haven't already heard of it )

Seems much more humane than CC but it can be hard work so try to get Dad roped in if possible!

tiamai_d

Classic FM

She sounds like she likes music so you could try the radio. I've found that Miss Amber likes to fall asleep with the radio on (she likes the talking as well as the music).

I've found that different things work on different nights. Tonight was a 'needs teddy-nu (little teddy with blanket comforter) against my head', last night was pretty simple, night before was 'fall asleep on mummies chest first', night before was a 'I'm just NOT sleeping at all' night before was a wake up at 2am doing my thunderbird impression.

If she is quiet, leave her, it's ok for her to be in her cot/crib and awake, it's not just for sleeping. When she does cry just go up, try music as that is what she seems to like, then try gentle patting, then a cuddle etc till she quietens down again and put her back down. You can use CC techniques without letting her actually cry (the not engagening her, pat-pat to settle, back down etc).

I remember with DS2 sitting on the floor next to the cot, then crawling away inch by inch to the door and then having to move back to the cot... and suddenly he is 4 years old and telling me to go away! :rotfl:

ETA, Frank, thats what I mean I think, pick up put down. They are not left to cry but they are left to settle on their own.

neneromanova

For the first 6 months, well maybe a bit less, I let my daughter go to sleep in my arms. Then slowly, quietly and carefully I would put her in her cot. I would stick to the nap times during the day, and If she missed one just before bed I woul;d keep her up till bedtime just so she would sleep. I would also give her a bottle just before I went to bed, even if that woke her up. She didn't like being woken to begin with but she soon learned that she got to fill her belly then go straight back to sleep.

Try letting her fall asleep on you and then putting her to bed for a couple of weeks until she is older. Then you can start to put her into her cot as she starts to feel sleepy and see if that helps her.

Good Luck.

Ms_Piggy_2

She's a baby - babies are not designed to go to sleep on their own. Almost all need some help to get to sleep.

Controlled crying isn't recommended for small babies. Anyway, it doesn't teach them to go to sleep, it just teaches them that no-one comes when they cry. How horrid
There's also evidence it causes neurological damage (extensive research by Margot Sutherland)

skintchick

Sorry, I should have said I don;t rock her to sleep. In the day I sometimes hold her and she sleeps on me, but at night she isn;t picked up, I only ever feed her to sleep except very recently with these night wakings when she gets very distressed and we end up having to hold her and help her off.

I do think she will learn herself because she has already learnt how to do it in the pram. And I don;t mind night wakings of some sort for some time, as they do need mummy when they are little.

Oh, and we have this cot http://www.dooyoo.co.uk/nursery-furniture/cosatto-olivia-bedside-cot/ which we are using as a bedside crib, and so she is supposed to have her own space BUT at the moment she is between us and my bottom ends up in the crib!!

skintchick

Ms_Piggy wrote: »

She's a baby - babies are not designed to go to sleep on their own. Almost all need some help to get to sleep.

Controlled crying isn't recommended for small babies. Anyway, it doesn't teach them to go to sleep, it just teaches them that no-one comes when they cry. How horrid
There's also evidence it causes neurological damage (extensive research by Margot Sutherland)

My thoughts exactly. Yes there is evidence of damage. That's why I think it is cruel and won;t do it.

shirlgirl2004

I used the baby whisperer method of pick up put down. DD did cry but only when I was holding her. She was never left to feel alone/unloved. It was hard work or a week or two but ultimately she now sleepswell and knows that mummy or daddy is always there or her. CC does not have to be the answer. As an aside we used an amby nest hammock because the movement mimics a mother's movement and as we carried her in a sling it continued what was happening in the day. Maybe not for you if you prefer cosleeping though.

CG77

Ms_Piggy wrote: »

She's a baby - babies are not designed to go to sleep on their own. Almost all need some help to get to sleep.

Controlled crying isn't recommended for small babies. Anyway, it doesn't teach them to go to sleep, it just teaches them that no-one comes when they cry. How horrid
There's also evidence it causes neurological damage (extensive research by Margot Sutherland)

I was just going to recommend Margot Sunderland. If you're doing attachment parenting, you're probably familiar with her already but if not she's an absolute must read.
'The Science of Parenting: Practical Guidance on Sleep, Crying, Play and Building Emotional Wellbeing for Life' and 'What every parent needs to know' are my bibles!

CG. x