finding friends

zombiecazz

I'm what my OH calls voluptuous, what i call fat. So obviously it's the hair that makes us look like dykes.

Here here for diversity.

whatamess_2

I am all for diveristy we all need to be different but people have an automatic response to the visual aspects.
Blonde = dumb
skinhead = dyke
thin = anorexia
fat = greedy.
Think we have hijacked the post a bit hope the op comes back later to join in.
I better go to bed, got work tommorow, (sorry in 12 hours)
night
Messy.

zombiecazz

Sweet dreams.

wannabe

Oh my god what have I started please don't all shave heads etc - only joking.
I know what you mean about sitting by PC.
I spend hours on this thing but the sad thing is I guess I kind of love it. It really does make me giggle at times which is great but you are right it does not have the same feel as real contact with someone. It is so hard to get out there and find a mate - I don't get why. I am a teacher and most kids find it so easy, I wish I could lose my inhibitions and just chat to someone but if you did that in the street most people would think you were a fruit loop! Is it because we are English?
Thanks to everyone for the offers of Pm sorry was a little blonde and not too sure how to do it properly and now know how to read mine! - oops

whatamess_2

Kids dont seem to have the same inhibitions as us adults.(I can be very child like when I`ve had a few):rotfl: Plus it is a bit of a sink or swim enviroment in a school. In a secondary school with a strict uniform code there is`nt the `Ive got the latest nike, adidas etc etc what have you got `primark trainers`what a loser worries for them.` Having said that would NOT want to return to school, they were awful years for me.
Messy

waterlilyann

I'm a bit of a MSE newbie and am more of a lurker on these boards than a poster. But I wanted to let you know wannabe that you really aren't alone. I'm newly married and in a similar situation but I recently started an evening class at college and met some really lovely people. It's a good place to meet people with similar interests and as it's an Adult education centre you're not surrounded by 16 year olds!!!

I'm still quite young (23?!) and can count the number of friends i have on one hand. I'm terribly shy and the thought of talking to a stranger in a pub/bar fills me with dread!! So if you need anyone to chat to feel free to PM me!

What's lovely though, is that whenever i feel a bit blue:o I can always find encouraging threads on here - it is such a wonderful place! Thanks to all who have made me feel happier without even knowing it! You are all so lovely.:D

delluver

Does anyone find these days that it's hard finding real good friends that you can be there for or that can be there for you as a lot of people are superficial and don't seem to have enough time for others?

patchwork_cat

I'm not sure that kids really do find it easy. My 2 certainly don't although I know that when I ask their teacher they are fine. I think that like the rest of us they cover up how they really feel.

I wonder if a lot of isolation is geographic. I wonder if people who stay in their home town feel the same?

Yes I think that a lot of people are too busy. Some people are self obsessed and will not cross the road to spit on others, but every so often you meet someone who restores your faith in human nature.

When I was having my second child I was paranoid that she would come in the middle of the night and With family being so far away there would be no one to look after my son. My next door neighbour ( who I was friendly with, I thought) knew how I felt and never offered.- She did a lot of harm to my faith in human nature, but I have realised that no there are people like me who would take in a neighbours child at 3 am in an emergency. The thing is meeting them! I've gone full circle!

Thriftylady

patchwork_cat wrote:

I wonder if a lot of isolation is geographic. I wonder if people who stay in their home town feel the same?

Possibly, but it depends on other people as well. In my case I've stayed in my home town and most of my friends from school went away to university and never came back. I went to university, but came back home as soon as I graduated. I'm now 30 and would have no idea how to go about making friends in my home town either. I honestly look at the other people my age who live round here, the ones who started working straight after school, who had their families young, and whose friends did the same, and I think that probably overall they are much more content with their lot in life than I am, or my friends are. We're taught from a young age to strive for academic achievement and a 'good' job but its taken me until now to realise that those things mean nothing if you are lonely or dissatisfied.....

MushyPeas

Hiya all, sorry been away for a few days

I've had a rubbish time recently and have slowly cut myself off from former friends, which now means I don't have many people I can pick up the phone to talk to. I want to echo other people's thoughts about how MSE makes me feel happier, and not so alone! But I wonder if that is a good or bad thing?

I have felt awkward about getting back in contact with friends I've lost contact with, but met up with a friend last night and it was good to go out and see someone. I hate coming back to my flat, but I do seem to spend a lot of time infront of the computer

Looking back, most of my good friends come from when I was involved with a charity doing volunteer work. I've moved back to my hometown and seem to make friends through work, though as I learn't yesterday that I'm facing redundancy and people are going for each others jobs I'm not sure how long that will last!

At least we have MSE