Is it worth trying to get child support from this man?

Loopy_Girl

Cute bubba btw....getting me broody again:D

Aphroditesgirdle

Are people trying to hint that Sicily's government is corrupt or something?? lol

Loopy_Girl

Aphroditesgirdle wrote: »

Are people trying to hint that Sicily's government is corrupt or something?? lol

Isn't every countries?!!!!! lol :rotfl::rotfl:

kelloggs36

Just hope the OP doesn't wake up one day to find a horse's head on her pillow.

Blonde_Bint

Aphroditesgirdle wrote: »

Are people trying to hint that Sicily's government is corrupt or something?? lol

YES but we thought we were being really subtle. lol.

I had a sicillian boyfriend many years ago and when I tried to dump him it was hell on earth he was harder to shift than chewing gum:eek:. I know you cant shove everyone under the same umbrella but sicillian/italians do seem to have the same mind set women = should be kept in either the kitchen or the bedroom if your a woman with a mind of your own you will hit problems very soon, as I did:D.

RedSky

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

Should he morally pay? Legally he will need to but what would be your stance on that?

In the situation I know about
- there was no future as a relationship for the couple
- there were less than a handful of bedroom instances
- condoms were chosen by the man and used even though the woman suggested not to

On discovering pregnancy the man did not want to be a father but the woman wanted to be a mother. Only she was given a choice.

Right or wrong, fair or unfair, the law judges this man as irresponsible while people view him as a "deadbeat dad" who has taken the easy option.

MrCarrot

Damn this thread puts me off having sex

RedSky

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

Why are you speaking in the 3rd person and why aren't you just using your normal (or one of them anyway) user names?

No shocker that BB thanked your posts eh?!:rolleyes2

3rd person - so peoples views of my posts are less influenced by information about me. I have never posted on another MSE thread before this one.

MrsTinks

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

I liked your post Mrs T

Can I ask your thoughts on this (curiosity as I am appreciating your views), you say that if OP was relying on the woman for contraception and a pregnancy occurred then he should probably not pay...okies

but what if the contraception failed (yes, it does happen - rare but does) so NRP thought contraception was covered, PWC thought contraception was covered but it failed.
No one knew about it till a missed period so no chance of MAP....not the woman or man's fault of pregnancy (lets just say although I still hapr on about condoms) and the woman doesn't/can't go through a termination for whatever reason....

Should he morally pay? Legally he will need to but what would be your stance on that?

Why thank you

I know contraception can fail - I had a miscarriage as a result of contraception failing when I was about 20... Came as a shock to me that the pill wasn't 100% - I assume it must have been mentioned before then but I don't remember it youthful ignorance and ignoring what I felt wasn't "going to happen to me"? I'm in a way glad I didn't have to make the decision because the first I knew was when I miscarried... But it made me think about what I would have done if I'd fallen pregnant and it had "stuck"... and I know that I would have had an abortion. I was in no position mentally, financially or any other way to care responcibly for a child. I can't say how it would have affected me but I know looking at my baby girl next to me that if I had made that decision back then I would have made the right one. At 29 I was finally in a position to care for a child in every way I feel is important... at 20? Despite being a very adult 20 year old then no I wasn't ready to look after another little life...

The beauty is I would have had that choice... but my partner wouldn't have. He knew I was on the pill, we'd been together 3 years and known each other longer than that but I know he wouldn't have wanted a child - yet he'd have had no say in it. He believed a child was not going to happen because I was on the pill and I think he had a certain right to think that. OK granted I know he'd have made a great dad and wouldn't have tried to get out of paying etc etc etc but it doesn't retract from it not having been his choice...

Morally in the case where the woman has said "I'm on the pill/coil/whatever, it's ok it's safe" then no... I don't think the guy should have to pay. How many blokes realise that the pill is only about 98% effective? And that's if it's used correctly... Legally then yes I'm aware he would have to but I think it's a tad unfair on men to be honest. I'm not saying I can see a better solution either - I can't - just that I can see cases where it's jolly unfair!
A friend of mine went private to get the snip because he didn't EVER want to risk fathering a child. He's VERY specific about not wanting to be a father and he's always been upfront with any of his partners about it - needless to say many of them have thought they could change his mind :rolleyes: and 2 years ago he was finally allowed to be "done". They didn't just tie the bits - they removed quite a section of the tube so there is litte/no chance of them rejoining...

It's so hard to say yay or nay sometimes - because we're all affected by the personal events in our lives when we decide these things. But I can't help but think so often that blokes get the raw end of the deal...

Loopy_Girl

MrsTine wrote: »

Morally in the case where the woman has said "I'm on the pill/coil/whatever, it's ok it's safe" then no... I don't think the guy should have to pay. How many blokes realise that the pill is only about 98% effective? And that's if it's used correctly... Legally then yes I'm aware he would have to but I think it's a tad unfair on men to be honest.

But I think most men (and women) are aware that NOTHING is truly fail safe so even if she says I'm on the pill or coil or jab or whatever and a pregnancy occurs then would the options be a) be forced into an unwanted abotion with horiffic mental consequences or b) the female have the baby but as it was 'her' contraception that failed then she morally isn't entitled to get CS?

So could it then be said that if a condom i.e a 'male' contraception failed, then he morally should pay CS as it was 'his fault'?

Am enjoying the points of view Mrs T....there will always be differeing points of view and I appreciate when they can be shared maturely.:D