On verge of ending it all

southernscouser

missk_ensington wrote:

and her parents will probably desrve it after they've supported her.

PS. OP can you please tell us your gender? All the women are calling you 'she' and the men 'he'. lol

Don't you mean him? :rotfl:

AMILLIONDOLLARS

First of all I must say that I am not judging, just want to get to the bottom of this sad situation....

What I am about to say, is pure speculation, so OP will have to put me right on this. I found it odd that OP parents were asking £500 rent. I am a parent and in my case I am only charging £250 all in (must be doing something wrong myself:eek: ) anyway this is what I thought, that maybe OP parents were already paying off some of OP debts, not realising that OP had amassed these massive ones.

This happened to my in-laws. mum in law was collecting extra money from brother in law's rent to pay off his baliffs then found he has further gambling debts. They thought they were helping him by taking on the responsibility of pay off his debts, he never learnt anything from their kind gesture.

For a parent to take nearly a third of their child's earnings (you say you now earn £1400) in rent seems a bit harsh. The reason I'm only asking for £250 is that I want my child to save as much as she can for a decent deposit then she can move out:j :j if I took a fair chunk of what she was earning then it would have to be for a very very good reason, beside I don't want her with me forever!!!

hourami

No problems I will try and answer some of your questions.

My parents know I am in trouble but not the exact nature or scale and that is why the rent is that much and not lower. Most of the debt was through gambling the money away. Yes I did spend money on frivilous things but my Harrods and John Lewis cards are Mastercards so can be used everywhere. The Selfridges one is the only one I have used 'instore'.

I did have a problem and I know I have overcome it. Also, I had a LTD company but my associate has taken alot of money from me hence the need to borrow on cards. The company is stil trading but has debts, I resigned from the company late last year so it's his mess seeing as he made it.

I know I have/had a spending problem, was the only thing that made me happy, and I am stopping my brothers from making the same mistakes that I did. I open all their statements to make sure they are not spending more than they can afford to pay back.

In case some of you were wondering I did not open any of my cards with the sole purpose of not paying back, I have had them all for a very long time.

BTW, it is a HE

all_hours

hourami wrote:

No problems I will try and answer some of your questions.

My parents know I am in trouble but not the exact nature or scale and that is why the rent is that much and not lower.

So are they using the £500 to pay off previous debt or are they saving it for you somewhere?

southernscouser

hourami wrote:

BTW, it is a HE

I was right! As always! :dance:

southernscouser

hourami wrote:

No problems I will try and answer some of your questions.

My parents know I am in trouble but not the exact nature or scale and that is why the rent is that much and not lower. Most of the debt was through gambling the money away. Yes I did spend money on frivilous things but my Harrods and John Lewis cards are Mastercards so can be used everywhere. The Selfridges one is the only one I have used 'instore'.

I did have a problem and I know I have overcome it. Also, I had a LTD company but my associate has taken alot of money from me hence the need to borrow on cards. The company is stil trading but has debts, I resigned from the company late last year so it's his mess seeing as he made it.

I know I have/had a spending problem, was the only thing that made me happy, and I am stopping my brothers from making the same mistakes that I did. I open all their statements to make sure they are not spending more than they can afford to pay back.

In case some of you were wondering I did not open any of my cards with the sole purpose of not paying back, I have had them all for a very long time.

BTW, it is a HE

You really need to make the call to Payplan. Your will only recieve excellent advice like you have on here and they won't judge you either.

I'm afraid I can't advise on whether you'll be accepted for bankruptcy or not as I'm not overly clued up on that subject. Payplan will be though.

hourami

Payplan called me, it as SOOO easy. I feel so relaxed even though it wasn't the 'full' interview. That is scheduled for Saturday evening but she felt they ould be able to help. She did say that creditors only expect you to pay upto £200 per month in rent if you live with your parents. Will try and get my parents to bring the rent down.

I am paying them that much as my mother takes a bit off and saves it for me in a seperate account in her name so that I can use it in case of emergency. I do not owe my parents any money as I couldn't bring myself to ask them and then possibly leave them saddled with my debts down the line.

Nicky_3

I know its been said, but I've just looked in on this thread - don't ever comtemplate suicide as a way out - you have your whole future ahead of you and this is just a period in your life which will not last forever.

At the end of the day, regardless of how bad your financial situation seems, there is ALWAYS a solution.

At the end of the day, its a lesson learned, one which you are passing on to your brothers which is great.

As far as bankruptcy is concerned, if that is the option, then take it. There are many people who have gone bankrupt due to Gambling and store cards and the likes, in your situation, you could end up with a Bankruptcy Restriction Order (BRO) which basically means a longer period of bankruptcy, but to be honest, its better to have that than sitting on the end of your bed worrying like mad and thinking suicide is the only way out.

Your life does not revolve around debt, (although many do allow it to) there is more to life than that, and your not alone in this situation, your situation is nothing new, and no one is going to be shocked in how this debt came about.

As far as Payplan are concerned. There is no way on this earth that anyone will judge you - all they are interested in is finding a realistic solution to resolve your situation.

It is understandable that you were worried about calling them because you are stepping into the unknown, but you know what they say "Grasp the Nettle" - you'll be glad you did and you will start to see hope at the end of what seems to have been a very dark tunnel. (Or should that be light?).

So pick up the phone, say hello, and take it from there - be brave

Nicky_3

Arh, came in too late

Congrats for doing it, well done.

Pobby

Hourami hi.Pleased that you are feeling more relaxed now.Well done for picking up that phone.As for suicide,I have known a few that have taken this course.DON`T DO IT.The sadness they leave behind is very great and the guilt that people feel,the very ones that cared for them,no,promise us that this is not an option.I have known a good few people that have taken the bancruptcy root,all have said that it was a great relief.They are still around and have taken a positive fresh start and are doing fine.I`m also an ex gambler but thank the Lord it something that I have recovered from.Keep posting.--xx