Unhappy and depressed, dont know if i can do this, but have no choice

Ex-Spendaholic

Please contact CCCS you cannot live like this. I'm on a DMP. I owe about £24K and the DMP payments are £104. It will take 20+ years to clear. If I'm totally honest I probably could pay a bit more but I prefer to make sure my kids (3 ranging from 2-10) don't go without. I don't worry about the DMP I just let it run itself. I know its a long time but the way I look at is that if I hadn't taken a DMP I would still be in the same debt and accruing more and would always have been in debt anyway. At least this way there is no interest and I'm not accruing more debt.

Could your elder child get a paper round to try to get herself some pocket money? I take it you've looked at the other areas for making money - daily clicks on Quidco etc?

Finally with the job, you deserve better than that. Have you looked at working in the likes of Tesco even? I imagine that your pay isn't fantastic where you are anyway and somewhere like Tesco would be flexible, you could probably work more hours when you want them and also get a discount card.

I wish you the best of luck and hope to come on later to read that you've at least got the DMP sorted out.

newlywed

icecube2009 wrote: »

at the moment my dmp will run ten years my children will be 21 & 24 by then & I will be 53! once I am debt free and can afford things my children will be earning their own money (hopefully) and wont need me!

That is all the MORE reason to ring CCCS and make sure you can live for the next 10 years

Your DMP is meant to allow you living expenses and then anything left will go to your DMP. You need to make sure you have enough for living expenses first, especially for the fact that you have to do this for 10 years.

The creditors can wait, you are going to pay them back, just slowly. If you lost your job or were unable to work through the stress of living expenses, what would they get then?

You can ring CCCS any time you like to ask for a review - I've done it a couple of times now, as well as making a one off reduced payment when I had no money saved for the MOT costs, and again earlier in the year when my dad died. The creditors? Well only one grumbled and that's the one who won't stop interest and they have finally decided to pass it to a debt collection agency so interest stops - so in actual fact, them grumbling and getting upset has worked out better for me :T

DebtKiller

Just wanted to add my voice to those before me.

First off, definitely contact CCCS and let them know about your work hours being cut. You cannot be expected to survive on a reduced income, and reducing payments to your debtors is the only way forward. Try not to dwell on the fact that a plan that originally was going to take 10 years may now take even longer to clear your debt - nobody knows what may come in the future, what's important is the here and now - and who is to say that in 6 months time you might not be in a different job, and being paid 3 times as much as now!?

Secondly, definitely contact the Pay and Work Rights Helpline and determine if what your employer is doing is dodgy. It's not a case of doing anything right now, but you are better off knowing what's what than staying in the dark & this situation continuing. Once you have a clearer idea, you can move forward.

I'd also suggest looking on the Moneysaving Old Style boards for ideas to reduce how much you are spending on food shopping each week. £45-£50 does seem a lot for a family of four (although it probably doesn't sound it), and some of the ideas on there are amazing for cutting down your spend - I know I've been amazed at the kind of savings I can make, when I put my mind to it.

Finally, a big internet hug to you. Good luck.

massivedebts

Morning Icecube!!
I saw your thread yesterday and have been worrying about you.
I remeber your posts on the DMP board not so long ago, you were sounding positive and upbeat. A DMP is to give you back your life and repay what you owe. I echo what most people have said you MUST contact CCCS and revise your budget. When I first set out in March I was determined to keep the DMP term to under 10 years which would have left one tight monthly budget. After speaking to the guy at CCCS we decided to set more realistic budget and now have a dfd of 17 years (I think!). We don't live a luxurious life (anymore!?) but we do have a little built in each month for the unexpected ie school visits, football boots, and have been able to get a few xmas pressies by being tighter on other areas of the budget. You really need to forget about you dfd, and think of now, you still need to have a life and be able to give your children the odd treat now and then....the choice for us was either have 10 years of feeling unhappy watching every penny week in week out or 17 years of a fairly reasonable life knowing that everything debtwise is under control and that if we were careful we could still have a good family life without the constant worry of money. We have just had a review with CCCs and are well within all the recommended guidelines.
Look back to when you first started out and how great you felt that you were heading for that light at the end of the tunnel abd keeo that thought. It doesn't matter if it takes 10 years or 30 years the light will still be there and we'll all be here to help you reach it.
Take care, CALL CCCS and keep us posted.
MD xx

icecube2009

HHH wrote: »

your job sounds truly awful and I worry that the children cannot be properly looked after if staff are working such long hours. Ofsted will do spot checks if someone complains, you could always pm the name and place of your nursery and I will do it for you, however this wont really help your situation. could you go on benefite while you look for a new job as if you made a complaint to her she would undoubtedly sack you and although you wouldnt have the pay you are getting now you might get something from a tribunal and benefits while you were looking for the new job. Have you talked to CCCS yet? please do as your situation is clearly making you unhappy and can probably be sorted out fairly easily.

my husband reported them to ofsted as we are often out of ratio, but didnt get very far they wanted actual dates & times when we are out of ratio & he didnt have this, I am currently keeping a diary so I can give them more info next time

icecube2009

massivedebts wrote: »

Morning Icecube!!
I saw your thread yesterday and have been worrying about you.
I remeber your posts on the DMP board not so long ago, you were sounding positive and upbeat. A DMP is to give you back your life and repay what you owe. I echo what most people have said you MUST contact CCCS and revise your budget. When I first set out in March I was determined to keep the DMP term to under 10 years which would have left one tight monthly budget. After speaking to the guy at CCCS we decided to set more realistic budget and now have a dfd of 17 years (I think!). We don't live a luxurious life (anymore!?) but we do have a little built in each month for the unexpected ie school visits, football boots, and have been able to get a few xmas pressies by being tighter on other areas of the budget. You really need to forget about you dfd, and think of now, you still need to have a life and be able to give your children the odd treat now and then....the choice for us was either have 10 years of feeling unhappy watching every penny week in week out or 17 years of a fairly reasonable life knowing that everything debtwise is under control and that if we were careful we could still have a good family life without the constant worry of money. We have just had a review with CCCs and are well within all the recommended guidelines.
Look back to when you first started out and how great you felt that you were heading for that light at the end of the tunnel abd keeo that thought. It doesn't matter if it takes 10 years or 30 years the light will still be there and we'll all be here to help you reach it.
Take care, CALL CCCS and keep us posted.
MD xx

Thanks for your lovely post has really cheered me up! I posted a message yesterday on the CCCS councillor board & was told maybe they should reconsider a different option to a DMP, which I assume means an IVA which I dont want, so had been sitting here wondering if I should even bother calling them. I am going to find all my bits & do it now (or do they open at 9?), thanks again for everyones support

icecube2009

DebtKiller wrote: »

I'd also suggest looking on the Moneysaving Old Style boards for ideas to reduce how much you are spending on food shopping each week. £45-£50 does seem a lot for a family of four .

i find what costs me a lot is food for their packed lunches, I dont buy them drinks now they have a refillable bottle & take water, and only buy crisps when I can find decent multipack deals, but it still seems to add up. Also not so much food as other essentials, like loo roll, washing powder etc.

icecube2009

quick question for someone before i call, do i need to totlly re do my budget? or can I just ask them to reduce my payment by X amount a month?

newlywed

You need to read them through all of your up to date figures. They will ask for all of them but don't ask for any proof of change of bills etc.

feedumall

hi have sent a pm hope you are ok today