Has anyone had any Where are you spending Christmas arguments yet?

Buffy_the_Vampire_Bat

Luckily, we have never had a problem. Both sets of parents have said all through our relationship that as long as we see them at some point over the Christmas period, they really don't mind not seeing us on Christmas Day. Both sets have also said they don't mind if we spend Christmas Day with the other set of parents, and believe me, I know all four of them, and know they are being truthful.

So we usually spend Christmas on our own, just the two of us, sometimes we stay at home, sometimes we book our favourite little cottage in North Devon for Christmas. We then always spend one weekend with each set of parents (and OH's siblings and partners - I'm an only [STRIKE]brat [/STRIKE]child ) at some point around the Christmas period - New Year at the very very latest.

We all love it as it spreads Christmas right out

sparrer

Our family tends not to argue, we all know what we're doing every year and happily accept each other's preference of arrangements :santa2:. Only a slight deviation this year as my very elderly DM wants to go to a hotel (think she's trying to relive days gone by when we used to spend Christmas at hotels as children) so as I'm the only single in the family I'll be going with her. Now I just have to find one that's the right price, not too far from her home and has a menu for someone with alcohol intolerance. At Christmas ? I can see me taking my own packed lunches :rotfl:. But if it pleases her at 88 years old then that's what we'll be doing

Taypier

I'm so confused about what to do this year that I might just volunteer to work over xmas!

I've just finished uni and decided to stay here with my boyfriend renting a flat instead of going back to my home town. My parents have long been divorced and xmas used to be spent at alternate houses, so xmas at mum's then boxing day at dad's and then vice versa. Easy. However now, my dad and I aren't as close as we used to be and although we still talk it's just not the same. It would be v v awkward if we had to spend xmas together! My mum remarried and has no room for me to stay if I did go back (my little bro usually has to give up his bed for me!)

I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years now and the last few years we've just gone back to the parents cos it was easier all round. This year we both want to spend xmas together but WHERE?! His mum is erm, more vocal than mine in letting us know her opinions and has made it quite clear to me that she wants her son back at home for xmas and has assumed I would go to my mums. My mum just leaves it up to me to decide but I always feel guilty for not going home as often as I should. The boyfriend is ignoring xmas for the time being and will probably start thinking about it a few weeks before :rolleyes: so I'm stuck for now.

The more I think the more working sounds like a good idea!

Evansangel

This christmas it will be me, OH and bump (and our kitten and goldfish) spending our first xmas together as a family.

Last year i went to my mums and he went to his.

I will be almost 30 weeks pregnant and i dont really want to be travelling ages to my mums.

Told my mum this a few months back, and she said "i bet you will be going to HIS parents"
I said "Nooo.. When i say we'll be spending it alone this year, it actually does mean we'll be spending it alone"

She hasn't spoke about it since, but i imagine there will be arguements about it in Nov/Dec time.

OH's parents (that live close to us) have said they dont mind not seeing us, and they'll see us around xmas.
My dad said the same (parents aren't together)

Im also not looking forward to telling my mum that we're not getting the adults gifts this year. She'll throw a hissy fit lol. Infact we kind of are giving them gifts. We are paying to have pics of our 4d scan printed for them.

shell_girl

OH and I don't spend the day together- we never have so I don't miss it. I'm with my family, he's with his Mam (she'd be on her own otherwise- and there's no way I could enjoy having his company at Christmas knowing it meant she'd be alone).

We do Christmas 2 on Boxing day- that's when we exchange pressies, eat leftovers and then go out and party! Works well for us. If we have kids one day then I'd like to spend it in our house, but that's all in the future!

Years ago when I was engaged we used to alternate between parents for dinner, but we always seemed to end up at mine for the night time... my family know how to party

Pee

No. There won't be any arguments.

My parents still think I am their little girl who should be at home for Christmas without a boyfriend present, and indeed, don't see why I should have a boyfriend anyway, as in an ideal world I'd still be living at home.

Fortunately I only live about five miles away, so will pop over on the day with presents and stay for about an hour and then get back to my boyfriend and try to recreate last years impressive Christmas dinner - done in just a microwave sized oven!!!

If they invited us both, I'd feel we ought to go, at least every other year - and I'd expect him to behave in the same way my parents would, which would lead to more arguments. So I'm glad I don't have to worry about that!

When I was with my ex, we lived miles away from my parents and always either went to his parents or they came to us. I loved them and they loved me so there were no problems at all then. (My parents weren't speaking to me at that point.)

I'm inclined to think that a part of Christmas is doing your duty and making relatives happy with visits, but not necessarily on the day.

Pee

Evansangel - that sounds like the nicest Christmas present anyone ever had - a picture of their new grandchild.

Stephb1986_2

Well my parents have invited my OH and his dad to join us for christmas dinner, my OH mum and dad are separated, normally they go to my OH sisters house last year we ended up with 2 christmas dinners, but this year I've decided to put his sister's nose out because I hate the cow. So I'll be spending christmas eve with my OH at his house in the morning when my OH and his dad goes to visit his sister I'll stay and make some mince pies, So then I don't have to put up with her and her ungreatful 3 animals. Then we will be going to my mums house for dinner Nothing like spreading the christmas cheer eh lol

If anyone wants to join me for christmas dinner you can do

Steph xx

SandC

valkirn wrote: »

Im not too bothered as to what happens at christmas this year, i know we will be going out for it though.. but it will be my first christmas with out my grandad and i dont think im ready to go to my parents and face him not being there.

My oh has just got back in touch with his mum too so im even contemplating going to her for christmas (which my mum wont be too happy about) but its just going to be hard enough just getting through the day

valkirn do remember though that one of your parents has lost their parent too. It might not be easy but you have to make a new normality for you all and keeping traditions might even help. Otherwise it will be just as difficult next year.

marshmallows

I hate xmas arrangements, they do my head in and Mil has already started with her guilt trip in getting us to go to hers , if no one can make it to hers then her and Fil will go away as they do not want to spend xmas in their home alone - so go away then, simple!!!