How to make friends?

miamoo

I live in cheshire if anyone wants to be my friend! I am not weird or anything x
I dont think I would have the confidence to go to an evening class on my own, I have been to the gym, but no one speaks to each other.

RoxieW

red_devil wrote: »

i never found it hard to make friends but to find people who were prepared to make an effort and keep it going!

I think i was too reliable for alot of people. These days it dosent bother me though. I am happy sometimes friends are more hassle than they are worth.

This is exactly how I feel. BUT I do think friends can be worth the hassle - you sound like you have been let down in the past as I have.

I was actually thinking the other day that the families board should arrange a meet as the debt free wannabees do.

dogcat_2

Hi, I think a lot of people have this problem...(obviously as the thread is sooo long...!) I have a few friends that I talk to on the phone...or through social networks...but not any for chats over coffee (or wine)!... really miss that...I moved to Devon 6 years ago...never really made any real friends...although I do like my own company too. I have a partner and 2 kids still at home...(I have 6 altogether)..Lets keep our fingers crossed that we can all make some 'real' friends soon!

gabyjane

Hi can i join this! was thinking of starting a similar thread some time back but thought id'e look really sad!
I have what i would call lots of 'aquaintances' and a few friends..prob 2-3 i can really confide in! i think back to when i was younger (i'm only 30 now!) when i had loads of friends and a healthy social life and went out lots and now never. I think it is a confidence thing with me really as like others have said i can start up a conversation at the school gates but never get any further!
A few weeks ago i went on a diff site which is for meeting local mums..i got quite a few replies..can i reply back though...no and i don't know why!..i get quite cross with myself for being like this as love nothing more than a girly chat or night out..SO last week i bit the bullet and sorted out getting in touch with old friends and now have a few days lined up which is nice..i am really going to try and keep it up too as it is nice to have a change rather than sitting at home every night! I'm sitting here now wondering if anyone i know is out and i'm not..thing is if i do get invited i either can't go or just don't fancy it..vicious circle really!
Nice to know there are a few of us though! (in a nice way!)

Newly_retired

This thread struck a chord with me too. I have lots of acquaintances but no close friends. I know loads of people to speak to, through church, evening classes, choir, voluntary work, but there is nobody I could just ring up for a chat or a listening ear apart from my daughter. I would love to find someone I could just go for a walk with for an hour or two. Nobody ever asks me to see how I am except at work where there are some really nice people, but it is taking it to the next level that never seems to happen. There are places I would like to go on holiday but not on my own. I can't bring myself to do certain things eg go for a walk on my own. I am married but DH is always busy working or watching TV and doesn't talk much. I get a lot of enjoyment going on these Forums but it is not the same as having someone local.

vickiv55

Ah so its not just me then!
Yep I can totally relate. I'm 30, nearly 31, and have 4 close friends who all live between 1 hour away and 8 hours away! Needless to say, that I spend most of my time with my family.
I used to have a wide circle of friends, well I say friends but possibly aquaintances. I worked in a bar, so there was a lot of bar hangers- on and when I left the bar to have my son, now 7, my social circle dropped to the 4.
I then moved back to my home town, and since then, I have really struggled to meet friends. All the mums up at my wee boys school are unbelievably cliquey. I swear to god, if you dont wear a berghuas anorak in various colours, you dont fit in!!! seriously!!!
I tried going to yoga class, but no one really spoke there. I am on facebook etc etc, but replying to status updates insnt really friendship is it?
my one fear is that my wee boy will not have friends, so i encourage him to go as to as many clubs as possible to mix with others. Poor him tho as he is always asking when he can get friends home to play or for a sleepover.... i've tried to speak to mums up the playground, and invite the kids round to play, but i get a polite, but definite brush off?!?
Dont get me wrong, i do like my own company, but...... sometimes I would like to be one of those girls you see in a big group of laughing smiling friends. Not the 30 yr old wandering round garden centres with my mum!!!
humph!

kitekat

Why dont each of you pm eachother and keep in touch that way,you never know where it may lead.Let your fingers do the talking.If you lived close to others you could meet up for coffee etc.

[Deleted User]

Having grown up in a very busy household with 6 siblings, I have no need of outsiders. My dh is my best friend and I can happily shut the door to the outside world but because I am self contained, friendly and helpful I find that people are constantly knocking at my door. Maybe the secret is not to appear `needy` ie are you an energy giver or an energy drainer

k_bagpuss

I've been in a similar situation before and I found a group through MSE on the holidays / days out thread - a girl hired out a bunkbarn in North Yorkshire ironically and asked for like minded people who liked the outdoors and didn't mind mucking in to make a meal, we all put in cash for food, brought out own drinks and had a great weekend and met some lovely people. The girl who organised it lived in London but we all came from all over the place. Some of them have a meet up group in Merseyside - https://www.activate-group.com
For anyone in the North East there's a great group - https://www.friendsnortheast.co.uk who are a fantastic bunch of people and there's always lots of events happening. They are not dating sites at all btw, and they will allocate you a same sex buddy to pm you and meet with you first and then introduce you to everyone

*Vikki*

well i am from East Sussex so if anyone wants to be my friend then pm me too lol