sex drive??

RoxieW

As you've prol gathered by the title this is quite personal but I'm wondering if anyone here has had the same issue??
I've been with my OH for 10 yrs and he's always had a very high sex drive - higher than me - and has been for the past 10 years pretty much constantly horny lol. However, all of a sudden, this has plummeted and I'm finding it quite confusing and not sure how to deal with it. We've gone from him being the instigator 80% of the time to things being the other way round. Thing is, I dont want to pressure him. If he doesnt want to then I dont want to push him. I'm just very confused by this sudden change.
He's changed quite a bit recently. He's always been a foodie like me but he's been on a massive health kick the past 6 months and has cut out all 'bad' foods and has lost 3 stone. He's also started going to the gym 4 times a week and has become more vain about his appearance/fashion etc. I want to be supportive but he's working hard to improve his body yet he's not interested in sex, is exhausted all the time and drinks these protein drinks that make his breath smell. I'm also trying to lose weight but he is like a dog with a bone and very strict with himself. He wasn't big before, btw, and I've always found him attractive.
One thing that sprang to mind what do men 'burn' testosterone in the gym? Could that be the reason he's no longer bothered in the bedroom? I'm hoping so because Im starting to turn it in on myself and worry about my appearance. It's just been so sudden I cant quite get my head around it - anyone else experience such a sudden change in their man?

DKLS

Sorry to say, but it sounds like he is having an affair.

kindofagilr

My first thoughts were the same as DKLS

Has he been going out more recently? (where he could be meeting up with someone?)

zzzLazyDaisy

I'm really sorry, but that was my first thought too.

HannahIOW

I agree with the other two posters. It doesn't sound right. I'm in a similar situation... he used to moan if it hadn't happened for two weeks... now doesn't want to at all, must be about 10-11 weeks since last time. I've asked why and had 4 different excuses from him this year, the last one blaming me. So now I just give up. I sympathise with you.

whitewing

If he's always wanted to get in shape and has finally managed to motivate himself to do something about it, then he may just be going a bit overboard. If he's exhausted, he isn't going to want to have sex. He isn't necessarily having an affair. What is prompting the obsession though? (Having said that I'm a bit of an all-or-nothing person when it comes to the gym).

kindofagilr

This person here appears to be going through the same thing

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=1974253

I really hope he's not though

RoxieW

wow erm.....not quite sure what to say

csh_2

Hmmmm, my first thought was could he be taking Anabolic Steroids but maybe I'm too trusting??

Minxy_Bella

I'm so sorry but that was my first thought too - he's got all giddy because some girl at the gym has glanced at him.

Sex is usually the barometer in a relationship - when the pattern changes, it normally means that another person has entered into the picture.

Of course, it might be that he's made himself ill with the protein shakes and too much exercise, if he's been silly about it and not done it healthily. He's not on steroids as well, is he? Just a thought!

It's nothing to do with you - honestly - it's all about him in his head. Try talking to him or just rekindling the spark by doing the sexy undies/romantic meals thing, unless you have evidence or a strong gut feeling that he's cheating.

Hope things work out ok for you.

xxx

pelirocco

csh wrote: »

Hmmmm, my first thought was could he be taking Anabolic Steroids but maybe I'm too trusting??

That could quite likely be the cause .