Splitting the bills 50/50, my money, your money - Please your married !!!!

yorkie18

We are married and have had a joint account since we first moved in together. We both pay the same into the account (although we do earn very similar amounts) and that is for bills, mortgage, food and other household items we need. Any money which is left in that account at the end of the month are our joint savings. We then have our own accounts for our wages to be paid into and for our own personal bills, along with whatever else we want to spend our money on.

This is what works best for us, but everybody has a different way of handling finances & works for one doesn't necessarily work for another. On top of this I really don't think it matters to whether you are married or not.

flea72

flea72 wrote: »

In most relationships there comes a point where one person has to be financially dependant on the other, thats when keeping things the same way, results in unhappiness

brazilianwax wrote: »

well, not in this case. we both cover our own non essential spends and still have plenty left over

So you think that neither of you will ever be financially dependant on the other, at any point in your relationship?

Redundancy, illness, children are things that will never affect your life?

Flea

hayley11

brazilianwax wrote: »

Have someone pay my bills for me and keep all my money to myself? It's just against my moral code - it's like being 'kept' to me.

I'm not sure if you're saying that means I'm "kept" or not? Because I don't feel that way at all. I think my OH would have to be a lot richer than me for it to feel like I was getting handouts.

If i'd just met some guy and wanted him to pay for a roof over my head, food in my belly etc then that would be a bit off but I think when you're living with somebody and plan to spend the rest of your life with them, then who earns the most and who pays for what doesn't really come into it. Not for us anyway.

brazilianwax

flea72 wrote: »

So you think that neither of you will ever be financially dependant on the other, at any point in your relationship?

Redundancy, illness, children are things that will never affect your life?

Flea

redundancy isn't likely for either of us, we have private health cover/insurance/savings and the jury is out on kids there isn't anything on the horizon that makes me think it could become a problem

brazilianwax

hayley11 wrote: »

I'm not sure if you're saying that means I'm "kept" or not? Because I don't feel that way at all. I think my OH would have to be a lot richer than me for it to feel like I was getting handouts.

If i'd just met some guy and wanted him to pay for a roof over my head, food in my belly etc then that would be a bit off but I think when you're living with somebody and plan to spend the rest of your life with them, then who earns the most and who pays for what doesn't really come into it. Not for us anyway.

if my OH was a millionnaire and I earned £10k a year I'd want to pay my way. i just couldn't let them spend their money on essentials while i kept all of mine for myself.

earning nothing is different to earning something.

flea72

brazilianwax wrote: »

redundancy isn't likely for either of us, we have private health cover/insurance/savings and the jury is out on kids there isn't anything on the horizon that makes me think it could become a problem

Trouble is life has a way of biting you on the bum, when you least expect it

Flea

flea72

brazilianwax wrote: »

if my OH was a millionnaire and I earned £10k a year I'd want to pay my way. i just couldn't let them spend their money on essentials while i kept all of mine for myself.

earning nothing is different to earning something.

but you are paying your way, by contributing £10k to the 'household' pot - who spends it and where, has no consequence on the other. if you werent spending his cash on things for yourself, you would be spending your own. everything gets paid for, you just dont have to have a label on whos money it is

Flea

brazilianwax

flea72 wrote: »

Trouble is life has a way of biting you on the bum, when you least expect it

Flea

thanks for that - think we have it all covered

brazilianwax

flea72 wrote: »

but you are paying your way, by contributing £10k to the 'household' pot - who spends it and where, has no consequence on the other. if you werent spending his cash on things for yourself, you would be spending your own. everything gets paid for, you just dont have to have a label on whos money it is

Flea

we're just going to have to agree to disagree because i'm never going to share your point of view

nearlyrich

brazilianwax wrote: »

we're just going to have to agree to disagree because i'm never going to share your point of view

I share your point of view, find a way of working your finances in your relationship and revisit if things change. Not sure why it has to be one way or the other like having children and other big decisions in life you do what's right for you and no-one else's opinion is of consequence.