Splitting the bills 50/50, my money, your money - Please your married !!!!

flea72

MrsE wrote: »

We share everything without a second thought.

DH earns more & is happy to cover the lions share of the bills.

But if I need to get money off him for something I certainly don't have to pay it back & vice versa.

then you have joint finances, whether they are in the same account or not

some people are living within a relationship, with the notions of whats mine is mine and yours is yours. If people are being tight with money, where else are they withholding in the relationship? It doesnt bode well

Flea

The_Banker_5

hayley11 wrote: »

Why is that? Is it a pride thing?

At the moment, my OH pays for all our "extras" because my income barely even covers the bills. But i'm happy and he's happy.

But you have just said you have a joint account.

I do sometimes think you say the first thing that comes into your head.:D

kindofagilr

I totally agree, I hear someone at work going on about her money and her partners money and how she has some of her money in an account he doesnt know about.

And I am just like !!!!!! kind of marriage is that!!!

The_Banker_5

kindofagilr wrote: »

I totally agree, I hear someone at work going on about her money and her partners money and how she has some of her money in an account he doesnt know about.

And I am just like !!!!!! kind of marriage is that!!!

She's planning to leave him;)

geri1965_2

beccam wrote: »

Maybe the problem was more to do with the wrong man rather than a joint account??

Maybe. If he was earning more than me, I'd have been more than happy to have a joint account.

hayley11

The_Banker wrote: »

But you have just said you have a joint account.

I do sometimes think you say the first thing that comes into your head.:D

We do have a joint account Stop confusing me! :rotfl:

:rotfl: Cheeky little sod you!

brazilianwax

flea72 wrote: »

so, if your OH had £500 left at the end of the month, and you had £10 you would still think the percentage split was fair?

I would. Not likely, but :rotfl:

flea72 wrote: »

from that i read your OH is a spendthrift, or you dont want them to know that you are

you're way off. a) my oh is from Yorkshire b) he's a bloke and therefore much cheaper on a daily/weekly/monthly basis

it's about trade off rather than money to us. for example, he is more likely to save money than me. that sits in the offset which ultimately benefits me. it was my money that paid the deposit on the house. i make it easier for him to earn money/train for half marathons by taking care of most of the house, the food shopping, cooking and DIY.

He works from home so rarely needs smart suits. I need new smart work clothes fairly regularly.

i'm not bothered about him spending on the things he wants (brewing kit etc)

just a few examples, but as i say, it works for us

and he monitors the offset so knows how much money i have at any given time. it's not about being secretive.

flea72 wrote: »

so either of you is happy to go cap in hand to the other money? because i get the impression its not, as you like to have financial independance

i like independence of every kind - it's how i got where i am and a big part of who i am. and neither of us has ever needed to go cap in hand for money to the other.

flea72 wrote: »

you think having separate accounts makes splits easier? no, all it means is one partner can hide their money from the other, leaving the other even more financially restricted than when they were in the relationship

not what i meant. you hardly need another layer of complexity when you're going through something so traumatic

flea72 wrote: »

Bills are not the crux of this discussion, its more about who has control of the money for the non-essential spends. In most instances, its the main breadwinner who has the most financial freedom

well, not in this case. we both cover our own non essential spends and still have plenty left over.

flea72 wrote: »

In most relationships there comes a point where one person has to be financially dependant on the other, thats when keeping things the same way, results in unhappiness

I think it will even itself out in our case - OH's pension is forecasting pennies, and mine will be substantial mind you, we should be mortgage free within 10 years or so. :beer:

in the meantime i think we'll carry on as we are.

brazilianwax

hayley11 wrote: »

Why is that? Is it a pride thing?

At the moment, my OH pays for all our "extras" because my income barely even covers the bills. But i'm happy and he's happy.

Have someone pay my bills for me and keep all my money to myself? It's just against my moral code - it's like being 'kept' to me.

brazilianwax

MrsE wrote: »

:eek::eek::eek::eek:

PS its not spending money, I do have to pay stuff out of it.

but not joint stuff?

The_Banker_5

hayley11 wrote: »

We do have a joint account Stop confusing me! :rotfl:

:rotfl: Cheeky little sod you!

I know, youre easily confused.:D