advice welcome - cheating other half or just fun?

hieveryone

The 'He's Just Not That Into You' book is fab, really good, if a little 'old fashioned', and slightly 'demanding'.

One thing I didn't get from the film was where the guy who was married and had an affair said it only happened because his wife pressured him into marrying her - someone asked him 'why did you get married?' and he said it was because of an ultimatum and this was what had made him so unhappy.

THEN, at the end of the film, they have Ben Affleck proposing to his gf because she dumped him because he wouldn't marry her. So logic would say that in a few years time, he's going to be cheating on her for the same reasons above... found that strange!

financegirl

hieveryone wrote: »

The 'He's Just Not That Into You' book is fab, really good, if a little 'old fashioned', and slightly 'demanding'.

One thing I didn't get from the film was where the guy who was married and had an affair said it only happened because his wife pressured him into marrying her - someone asked him 'why did you get married?' and he said it was because of an ultimatum and this was what had made him so unhappy.

yes, but at the end of the film - he was seen chatting up another woman in the supermarket, (like he did Scarlett Johassen when he was married) meaning that he didn't really want to be ever married and would continue to behave in this way as this was his 'normal pattern of behaviour.

THEN, at the end of the film, they have Ben Affleck proposing to his gf because she dumped him because he wouldn't marry her. So logic would say that in a few years time, he's going to be cheating on her for the same reasons above... found that strange!

Ben A on the other hand realised that he lost the best thing to ever happen to him and hot footed it home and did the right thing.

(BTW - I've done !!!!!! all work all day)

hieveryone

Aahh but Financegirl, according to the rules of 'the book', do you need to lose something to realise how much it means to you?? Does that not just smack of a girl manipulating a guy into marrying her? lol reading too much into this me thinks...

financegirl

hieveryone wrote: »

Aahh but Financegirl, according to the rules of 'the book', do you need to lose something to realise how much it means to you?? Does that not just smack of a girl manipulating a guy into marrying her? lol reading too much into this me thinks...

Yes, he did lose his wife - Jennifer Conelley, but he didn't try to get her back - meaning she (jennifer) lost nothing by divorcing him because of the affair.

He lost her, but he didn't realise or care that he lost her, because he didn't fight for her and he went back to his old ways of chatting up women in the supermarket, and if he can't realise that he lost a prize then sod him - let him get on with it.

I am laughing so hard as I write this, purely because I have become so consumed with it.

(Off she skips home, with book in hand, men running in other direction screaming :rotfl::rotfl:)

hieveryone

Yes but obviously at the time of her ultimatum, he thought the best thing to do would be to marry her, and the same scenario starts again with Ben A and Jen A

I totally get what you mean being consumed by it - I think the book hits a lot of nerves and you start thinking, 'hold on a minute... I'm not putting up with this!!'

kpey

The Jennifer Connolly bloke got given an ultimatum and just married her.

Ben Affleck went away, thought about it, realised that he did want Jennifer Aniston in his life forever and that he WANTED to marry her. Then he came back months later having thought about it

Totally different! :T

zippychick

You's have all totally ruined the film and its ending now! Cheers!

Pepzofio

kpey wrote: »

The Jennifer Connolly bloke got given an ultimatum and just married her.

Ben Affleck went away, thought about it, realised that he did want Jennifer Aniston in his life forever and that he WANTED to marry her. Then he came back months later having thought about it

Totally different! :T

Errr... So the message if the film is actually 'he IS that into you' then?

(Genuine question - haven't seen it and not sure if I'm reading this wrong!)

hieveryone

kpey wrote: »

The Jennifer Connolly bloke got given an ultimatum and just married her.

Ben Affleck went away, thought about it, realised that he did want Jennifer Aniston in his life forever and that he WANTED to marry her. Then he came back months later having thought about it

Totally different! :T

lol, this is what I'm saying though, going on the 'rules' of the book, a guy should know that he wants to marry you and apparantly girls shouldn't 'wait around' for someone in any sort of context. Therefore, going by the rules of the book, Jennifer Aniston should really have told him to 'fcuk off' because he had had his chance and blown it at the time

Dinah93

I'm feeling quite sorry for the OP now who had a genuine question and we've all kind of lost sight of her needing help a little bit. The reference to the book and putting value on yourself is good, but maybe if you wish to debate the contents of the book/film a thread could be started in MSE Arms for it?