Domestic violence-its not just physical

moiramber

I can completly relate to that, Sometimes I worry I'm getting PND when actually I'm just exhausted and feeling stressed out because i'm exhausted. It's amazing how much a good nights sleep can do for you

belfastgirl23

Glad to hear you're feeling so strong today

yoni_one

I remember the days of sleep deprivation when my son was born, I thought it was never going to end at the time.

Without adequate sleep it is so difficult to function on any reasonable level, it isn't just the feeling of tiredness or exhaustion, you become forgetful, tearful, zombied and start to wonder if you are losing your mind.

Cassie, it's great to hear you are feeling so much more positive today.

Cassie**

I have also let my brother know what has been going on.He is very supportive.He said he has a room I can stay in for as long as I wanted,if I wanted,or just for a break,although he lives some distance away.

yoni_one

Thats great news Cassie, now you have family support and a place where you can go to get away and have a proper think.

If you do plan to stay with your brother for a while I suggest you continue to access support from a local DVA agency or by phone with your regular one, the reason i say this is because when out of the situation it is possible to start forgetting the abuse and remembering the good times. This can then build up a distorted memory of how it really was (especially if he or you gets lonely and he starts telling you things you have been longing to hear).

As weird as this may sound, when away from the abuse it isn't uncommon for our own minds to take over and start acting on their behalf which can lead to returning with false high expectations.

Cassie**

I have decided I am leaving next week.I can't stand it any more.

Cassie**

yoni_one wrote: »

Thats great news Cassie, now you have family support and a place where you can go to get away and have a proper think.

If you do plan to stay with your brother for a while I suggest you continue to access support from a local DVA agency or by phone with your regular one, the reason i say this is because when out of the situation it is possible to start forgetting the abuse and remembering the good times. This can then build up a distorted memory of how it really was (especially if he or you gets lonely and he starts telling you things you have been longing to hear).

As weird as this may sound, when away from the abuse it isn't uncommon for our own minds to take over and start acting on their behalf which can lead to returning with false high expectations.

I have been through this before,but now in my head,I have moved on.It is so bad,and " look for the pattern" ,and I have seen the lull before the storm so many times now.I am not going to wait for the inevitable next storm,because,of course it will come,he will never change,and I have given him more than enough support so far.

redstararnie76

Hi Cassie,
I'm just come across this thread and read through it.
I'm sorry I can't offer much in the way of advice, but I wanted to send you some 'virtual hugs'.
I had to post to tell you that I'm so impressed with you.
Please don't ever descibe yourself as 'a loser', no matter how you mean it, because you aren't. You are so strong for being able to share your feelings and what you are going through on this thread. You sound so determined now, that I'm sure you are going to do well - it may take a while to get where you want to be, but you are taking the first steps in the right direction and YOU WILL GET THERE!

moiramber

Cassie** wrote: »

I have decided I am leaving next week.I can't stand it any more.

Thats fantastic news! :T Well done for being so strong. :j

Have you decided where you're going to go etc?

RAS

Cassie** wrote: »

I have seen the lull before the storm so many times now.I am not going to wait for the inevitable next storm,because,of course it will come,he will never change,and I have given him more than enough support so far.

Well done. Make your plans carefully and keep you head down in the mean-time.