MSE Parents Club Part 4

Becles

searching_me wrote: »

a cross between border collie and dobeman called sweep
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/photo.php?pid=1285757&id=659161923 x

awww - he's lovely

Charlotte used to giggle at Bob. Now she's bigger, she loves playing with him. The brush is just in one of the kitchen cupboards and she keeps getting it out and brushing him. He has a cod liver oil capsule on a morning and she likes to give him that then put his food down for him.

AM - do you think you've got a future with OH? Can you still see yourself being together in 5, 10, 20 etc., years? Thinking long term might help you put things in perspective and decide if it's workable or not. Counselling will help too as it sounds like you've both been through a lot.

emlou2009

hello again, i've not been on for ages again :doh: so much to do, i never knew we had hoarded so much carp!! theres just too much for me to read through again so i wont but congrats to any births, welcome to any newbies and agreements that OH's are useless/wonderful wherever needed

seth really seems to hate his cot - Bad Times! i get screaming every time he goes into it, but for some reason if OH puts him in and walks off he drifts off to sleep on his own, but when i do you would think i was torturing him! and at the flat we had a neighbour who decided to knock on the door and ask if she could help every time seth cried, at this one we have a wall banger - great :rolleyes: cos obviously banging on the wall is going to make me make more of an effort to stop him crying lol!
we slept on a sheet the night before we put him in the cot for the first time which is now on the cot, and there are no toys although i'm wondering if putting some in might make it a bit more familiar for him? i suggested to OH that we take the side off the cot and have it against our bed as i think that may help and then once he is used to not being in the middle of us put it back up, but he seems to think cold turkey is the way forward, sometimes i really wish he wasnt a daddy already cos it would make things so much easier if he didnt think he knew it all!
it seems like if we lean over the top of the cot he is ok but if we sit next to it and he has to look at us through the bars, or if we walk away for even a second, he freaks out completely!

mookiandco

AM - this is the story I read a couple of months back about PND in men.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1184290/How-FATHERS-post-natal-depression-One-mans-harrowing-testimony.html

Leila has been feeding pretty much constantly today so i'll be back to chat later if I get half a chance!

Sami_Bee

Em just drop the side and if it works you can stick 2 fingers up to OH

money_maker_3

Can I ask, how long was it for all of you between your after baby bleeding stopping and your 1st period again??
My bleeding has stopped less than a week and started again today !!!

searching_me

MM i stopped for 3 days then spotted for a week then stopped again x

money_maker_3

I just thought I had a good 2 or 3 weeks after Jasmine, but I was on a lot of medication too, so not sure if that had somethng to do with it

MrsTinks

Couple of things - yes they believe men can get PND too - however the more I speak to people - especially ones who say to me "oh yes I've got PND" with a smile on their faces... the more I think people are seriously prone to calling baby blues PND... I know PND is real but I think people are too quick sometimes to jumping to the worst case scenario from the outset. If you think he might have PND then get him along to the GP - they will be able to go through things with him Ultimately then loosing a job let alone 2 is stressful regardless of having a new little baby too...
Em - I think between you and your OH you need to decide on a plan - I think Bruno and his missus did the controlled crying and it seemed to work? Maybe Bruno can remind us?
Personally I'd go with the softer option of having him in the cot next to you but it's your baby and you need to do what you can cope with I don't know that I could hack loads of screaming with the cold turkey method...

cazscoob

hi all just to say hi and im fine, well not really?? everything has come out today and i have actually scared myself with how bad i have got. im convincing myself that things are soo bad and wrong that i cant see light at the end of the tunnel. im pushing OH away and he is trying so hard to sort things out between us. i didnt sleep last night due to 1) me convincing myself that Oh is cheating again and 2) charlie was coughing and i was terrified incase something happend to him during the night.
today is the day i realise i have very bad PND and i need help, i have held it together for all this time but today i have crumbled and i know if i dont get help now that i will probably loose everything.
OH is going to phone the doctors tom for me as i know something needs to be done, i just cant face making the step to phone.
hope your all ok and thanks for being there x

MrsTinks

Well weve had a fairly good day - Alexandra (I'm consciously trying to not call her Roo all the time lol) has been feeding loads so obviously trying to up my supply and it's exhausting! Went for lunch with a friend of mine - she's setting up her own vet practice and wanted us to check the contract and the numbers etc with the franchise she's looking at going through. Unfortunately it's quite a way away or I'd have applied to be receptionist
Whilst she was here she jabbed the furs and had a look at my boy cat who I thought was looking a little under the weather - she says he's anemic so I'm driving him up to see her at the surgery tomorrow afternoon for full bloods etc... thank crunchie he's fully insured! Hoping it's nothing too serious - he's my baby boy, always been the soppy dappy cat out of the pair and everyone loves him...

On the up side then Alexandra is getting very co-ordinated with the little hands and is stuffing them in her mouth at the moment... will try her with some rattles tomorrow

Have managed to list 5 games on Ebay - have a PILE of baby clothes to stick on there later when hubby get's back from cleaning the car - yes he left it till gone 7 to go clean the car which he needs tomorrow as his client is coming and getting a ride with him miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiles to a call centre they are looking at doing support from (taking it back from off shore) so it has to be clean and tidy - if he thinks I'm cleaning and tidying the house though he's got another think coming!!!
We looked at money tonight and he's got about £800-900 spare a month at the moment thanks to the mortgage dropping loads after the fixed rate period ended so we're going to get the joint account set up and whatever he has left at the end of each month will go into the "pot" - that will help me pay the bills and so on and any left over will go towards overpaying our debts - I'm going to start doing some extra selfemployed work to supplement my maternity pay... If we're really lucky and careful we can afford for me to stay home the full year! Fingers crossed!