The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

ginvzt

jiblets - don't be so harsh on yourself (I know it is easier said than done). Take a break, if you feel it will help. Being so down is no good for anyone...

Leopardlady - you are lucky. Although, to say that - my OH had no problems with testing. As he says (and I agree) we are in this together. It is going to be OUR baby, so there is no other way just both going through this together.

liloandstitch

Good Afternoon all, Leopardlady, a supportive OH is worth his weight in gold! We are all lucky in that we have good men, I know I would have gone dotty by now if hubby wasnt so good. I was worried that he wasnt that fussed (he has 4 adult kids from first marriage + 2 grandchildren) about another as we already had the one, but he is just as commited as I am so I truly am blessed.

Jiblets, please dont be so hard on yourself. This is a very very emotional experience. Why not stop trying to bd at the moment, and just concentrate on the cuddles and love side of things and keep your relationship and emotional health strong and then only make love when you are ready. In the grand scheme of things it wont delay anything and Of course you deserve the IVF, dont ever think otherwise. But I strongly suggest that you look after yourself now, and use the time you are waiting to get yourself into the best condition you can, from an emotional and physical point of view - as this will maximise your chances of success. Remember, we are on the scenic route - we might as well enjoy the view otherwise the journey will seem interminable.

Hi ginvzt XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Love and hugs to all = Lilo

MadMac_2

Oh dear, sorry Leopardlady, but sure your day will come again soon, x

Jiblets, you and me both! OH just can't perform, he is low again and I'm not helping with my tears and inability to talk about anything. We make a right pair!

Ginvzt, wow! What a lovely story that is. You just don't expect absolute strangers to be so helpful, it really fills me with hope that there are still some good ones out there (me included, of course! I'm always trying to help people and seem to be the red phone advice hotline for anything remotely technical - or legal!)

Lilo, so true. What would we do without our OHs - then would we become the Sperm Bank Users Club?! Ermm, I'm trying not to think that negatively, but it isn't working!

I'm still struggling emotionally but won't give in to it today - I've got too much work to do!!

Wishing everybody a big group hug and the chocolate bourbons and herbal teas are sitting at home ready for everyone in need, x

cedrickerry

Just popping in to welcome the newbies!

Sorry still part of the DLCC, dark times for me, so no big post at the mo (thanks for the best wishes re the dog - she's for OH though - making me more stressed - I'll stick with the cat!)

jiblets1

Thanks for all your support guys. Still waiting for the counsellor to ring back with an appointment for me to see her....

Thought I'd leave the tea today, and bring us all a soft drink....


Let's hope the weekend gives us all the lift we need. I for one have a wedding on Saturday, and I'm going to see Nerina Pallot on Sunday. Nice! Unfortunately it seems that work is going to maybe be a sod on Monday, but let's not think ahead that far....;)

skint_chick

Hi everyone

I'm back! I posted a few months ago and then never came back - mostly because thinking about trying makes me miserable realising it's not happening and not focussing on it I can pretend I don't really care! But I'm 32 now and need to start putting some effort in if I want to get a result. I've been trying to lose weight and eat heathily, have just ordered a fertility monitor, and I'm on medication to control my hormone levels so I'm hoping next month that my periods will return - they've been gone for 6 months now:eek:

I'm not able to get any fertility treatment on the NHS until my BMI is lower but my HSG was fine, blood tests are normal and OH's swimmers are alive and well. Specialist was blunt about my weight being the issue - BMI is 42. I am going to work super hard on getting it down and not comfort eating although it's hard when everyone announces they're pg:rolleyes:

Are there any supplements OH should be taking to help improve his sperm - esp to make them less "congealed" and what should I be taking? You guys seem to know sooo much

liloandstitch

My hubbie takes Wellman, skintchick - it has zinc which is good for sperm and also some amino acids which are needed for sperm production. They are not the cheapest, but someone told me that you get what you pay for with supplements, so I have always been happy to pay for them.

Good luck with reducing the bmi, I have heard that bringing it down can help, so I hope you are successful. I love comfort eating, so I feel your pain!!!! But at 32 you are still only a baby, so plenty of time yet.

Thanks for the drink jiblets, just what I needed, and far better than the boring black coffee I am drinking at the mo.

Big hugs for MadMac and cedrickerry XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXx

Lilo

jiblets1

Just been thinking about "the scenic route". That's a really nice way to think of it. I shall tell myself that often.

lauzjp

got a BFP on weds, told hubby & we're all happy. Had a celebratory *cough* and er, oops started bleeding. Just not meant to be. Again.

ginvzt

Ok, I am loosing it. I burst out at OH last night when he made a comment about my cake (the one I used to make a while ago and was just going to make in the next day or so again). He was not wrong meaning, but that was enough for me to go to the other room and close the door. Then again later in the evening, when we were getting ready for dinner and he took more than 30 sec to come downstairs from computer. I had to call him twice, fair enough, and he wanted gravy (I can't stand it).
And again this morning, when he said that my raspberry jab should not be called raspberry jam, but seed jam (I have not removed seeds, as I like it that way...). So, I just said that nothing is ever good enough for him and went to have my breakfast on the sofa...

I think I am going to blame Clomid for these outbursts... Good thing I have finished taking them for this month, so maybe I'll get more normal in the next few days...