The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

VK-2008

c4b congrats to you,
dont have time to comment as much as i would like but like to pop in when i can
me and dh still plodding away - roll on the next 3 to 6 months when we start iui
i need to get finger out and lose the pounds though not too many to go thank goodness
felt a bit low this weekend so many folk pg or just had wee babies and then nowt for me. dont mean to be selfish but i have waited my turn 6 years!!!!! arrrggghhh]
soooo need a rant and good cry just getting too much now

jujugaboo

VK-2008 wrote: »

dont mean to be selfish but i have waited my turn 6 years!!!!! arrrggghhh]
soooo need a rant and good cry just getting too much now

Right there with you. I have been on this thread far too long now.

Good luck to everyone else.

Sticky vibes to you c4b

VK-2008

i just feel its a bit unfair at times i know someone who is 6 months yunger than me and in the time its taken 6 years for me to have one m/c she has had that i know about 1 termination 3 children and expecting the fourth in the next month

aarrrggghhhh just one of those days i guess feeling sorry for myself if my dh and i could even have onewe would be ever so grateful
i know there are people in a worse position than me who have specific problems with ttc but this unexplained bit raises so many questions, it would of been good to have an answer a reason
but then looking on the other side whos to says this month might be our mnth
its the not knowing that hurting me and i know my dh is the same

epsilondraconis

VK-2008 wrote: »

... dont mean to be selfish but i have waited my turn 6 years!!!!! arrrggghhh]
soooo need a rant and good cry just getting too much now

jujugaboo wrote: »

Right there with you. I have been on this thread far too long now.

I know how you feel. I’ve been on here far too long too. 9 years and 1 mc isn’t a great return for the wife and me.

Is it just me or does everyone else feel as though their life is in limbo the whole time? We keep talking about going on a big holiday, but then don’t really want to book anything because we don’t know when we’re going to use our last NHS IVF cycle, plus we keep hoping that we will fall pregnant and so will have that to look forward to instead. Also, do we blow £4k on a big holiday or save it as part payment for another IVF cycle?

My rant coming up…

One of our groups of friends contains around 7 other couples and in the time my wife and I have been married and trying for children, we’ve seen each of them going through the process of getting married and having children. Around April last year, 6 of the other couples had either had children or had recently announced that they were expecting. There was 1 couple left, apart from us that were still trying for a child. Even though we would have been happy for the other couple if they became pregnant, we knew it would have been so hard if we were the only ones left. It was a strange series of events, that suddenly made us think that my wife’s pregnancy was meant to be. During early April, my wife went to the hospital for some scans because she wasn’t down regulating with the IVF drugs only to be told that she was pregnant. Obviously we were elated and even though she saw the embryo on the scan, we still had to do our own pregnancy test that evening. Bizarrely the following day, we received a text from the last couple announcing they were pregnant.

I remember we all met down the pub sometime in early June and four of the women were all pregnant at once. It was one of those times in your lives where you think that you would change a thing and everything was perfect (apart from my dad passing a couple of years before). Although we’re obviously pleased that all of the other couples went on to have healthy babies, it makes you wonder why we had to be the ones that lost ours at 20 weeks.

I don’t know – anyway, that’s my rant over for another few weeks.

I’ve just remembered why I posted, we’ve ordered the book, “Is your body baby friendly” in the hope that will help us. We have our next NHS consultation in April and so will hopefully get some useful information that we can discuss with them. From reading on here, we may not get the NHS to do many / any of the tests and so will seek out the relevant professions to see what they can offer. I’m coming to the conclusion that standard medical procedures may not be the best route for us.

Hope all is going OK C4B. Fingers crossed for some more BFPs on here.

sarahs999

Epsilon, I've just read that book, it was a revelation. I literally wanted to punch the air and shout 'yes' all the time. If you need help with who to turn to after the NHS please pm me - I've come to the same conclusions as you. What the NHS should really say to people like us is, 'we don't know why you can't have babies, but there are other people who might do'. Instead they think they are the only ones with the answers and refuse to entertain the idea that someone else may be able to help, and refuse to give you the tests and medication that might be your solution.

And that's my rant for the evening! We're all getting it out of our systems tonight. Hugs to all.

sarahs999

Am starting my steroids today. Rather nervous. THeir biggest side effect is meant to be lack of sleep, but I suspect it'll be weight gain for me. Still, I can put up with being a fat, bearded, sleep-deprived lady if it gets me a baby!

QQuaver

Derby2 wrote: »

I don't think Clomid will do much as I'm already apparently ovulating but I guess it's just the process they have to follow.

Clomid might give you better eggs, fingers crossed it'll work:)

sarahs999 wrote: »

Am starting my steroids today. Rather nervous. THeir biggest side effect is meant to be lack of sleep, but I suspect it'll be weight gain for me. Still, I can put up with being a fat, bearded, sleep-deprived lady if it gets me a baby!

Good luck:)

epsilondraconis

sarahs999 wrote: »

Epsilon, I've just read that book, it was a revelation. I literally wanted to punch the air and shout 'yes' all the time. If you need help with who to turn to after the NHS please pm me - I've come to the same conclusions as you. What the NHS should really say to people like us is, 'we don't know why you can't have babies, but there are other people who might do'. Instead they think they are the only ones with the answers and refuse to entertain the idea that someone else may be able to help, and refuse to give you the tests and medication that might be your solution.

Thanks. We're looking forward to reading through the book. Even if it doesn't work, at least we can say we've done everything we can and left no stone unturned.

fluffnutter

epsilondraconis wrote: »

Is it just me or does everyone else feel as though their life is in limbo the whole time? We keep talking about going on a big holiday, but then don’t really want to book anything because we don’t know when we’re going to use our last NHS IVF cycle, plus we keep hoping that we will fall pregnant and so will have that to look forward to instead. Also, do we blow £4k on a big holiday or save it as part payment for another IVF cycle?

No, it's not you. For a while my life felt static. Do I leave my job which I hate? If I do, do I get another one knowing that the scheduled cycle of IVF I've got coming up might work? Do I do voluntarily work instead? Do I just leave my current job or do I hold out for redundancy (more money for IVF!). Does my husband take a new job which will involve staying away during the week, or would that be too much if we were to have a baby?

I felt like I was living a half-life

VK-2008

this book is your body baby friendly - i have not heard of it before
is it recommended to get?