The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

anmarj

MrsRogers wrote: »

Hi all

I have been a lurker for a while now and thought id share where we are up to and get some advice.

Nobody other then our doc is aware of our situation. Im 30 and DH is 30. We have been TTC for 15 months with no success. My cycles averaged 46 days up until this current one.. currently on CD 126:eek::mad:

We have been to doc who has sent me for blood tests and DH is doing a seman analysis on Thursday.

I guess Im wondering what the next step is from here?

I am also worried about my BMI I am Obese and was wondering if anyone had come up against any issues having a high BMI.

Another burden is our friends and family dont know and we dont want to tell them DH and I are very private and prefer to stay that way.. however all we ever here is "when are you having a baby... we want a grandchild blah blah blah":mad: Like we are not trying !!

Sorry didnt mean to rant it just gets so frustrating and upsetting

don't lose hope or heart, I am overweight, i first went to the hospital in the Summer but I have had to lose weight to get my bmi down to what our hospital offer clomid at (35) each area will have their own, ie neighbouring county is 30 and so on. I went back in December last year and in the six months managed to lose 1 1/2 stone through prosgerone cream/diet and excercise. I now only have about 9 lbs to lose and I can get clomid. We were offered the chance to start the process of the HSG as that takes at least 3 months go get an appointment and bordering on 40 this year I don't have time to lose. It has been very stressfull the last few week wondering if my period was going to start, thankfully it did today and I go for my HSG on Monday , OH is taking the day off and coming with me (poor man!) Up til yesterday afternoon, I was highly stressed wondering if it was going to happen, his mum and dad know, and it is even more important I get pregant as my dear father in law has been diagnosied with cancer and we are not sure how long he has, it has been breaking my heart as my own father died when I was 16, and I so desperatly want to have baby that would have a grandpa, not sure if that is going to happen:(. His brother and sister don't know (if they do its not from us), remember we are here for you to have the moan at, its not easy but as a couple you can do this. xxxx

chickpea

OK, so I lied a bit when I said I had got to acceptance of things - I am so completely depressed today. It was prob triggered by a combination of things, colleague's wife having a baby yesterday, the latest consultation with FS on Fri, playgroup full of pg women this am...I don't know, but I just want to curl up and die at the moment. But I can't, I'm completely trapped, have to just carry on.

sarahs999

Hugs chickpea.

Cake4brains

Sending you hugs Chickpea xx

lisawood78

Ahh Chickpea, I think it must be the week for it as I feel awful too.
Nothing any of us can see will fix it but we're hear to listen and to send big cyber hugs to you. Hope the dark cloud gives way a little and you can see the sunshine again.
xx

mokba43

Chickpea, im in the same boat, im a nanny of 2 gorgeous girls, one is having a sister/brother, our best friends are recent parents and my whole working life revolves around happy families and little angels.

Hang in there, it will pass. PM me if you need to chat xxx

mokba43

LisaWood, i think we all know how you feel, if one more person says to me 'stop thinking about it and it will happen'.... raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thing is, people try to be understanding and supportive without knowing sometimes we just want to scream and shout and get our wait.

oh well, lets just sit down pretty i suppose...

Primmer

Chickpea - sending you big hugs

I have a sil who is 7 weeks pregant and who sent me an email setting out how big the baby was, how it was developing and expected symptoms which is not what I wanted to see when I got into work today. It is not that I am not pleased for her but I don't want to be reminded of it especially when it is so early on!

I have appointment to see the gp this Friday morning to discuss my blood results and dh's SA results and to discuss the next steps. I feel really nervous about it and hope that she won't just send us away to keep trying as it has been over 2 years ttc with af turning up every month and it is so disheartening and with our ages against us I really think that we need to move fast.

jujugaboo

Sending you bigs hugs Chickpea. x

My turn to moan now, 4 days post transfer and I feel nothing. I have a few twinges and the sore boobs from the trigger shot still but thats it. I am going up and down tell myself I am pregnant but I still have that voice in the back saying it hasnt worked. I kinda feel empty inside and praying its not over. My friend came round this morning with her 7 month old which was lovely but just make me more want to have a baby of my own. I keep thinking what if it doesn't work where do I go from here, no job, no baby, nothing. I am trying to remain positive but as you all know better then anybody its hard.

onestep

Sending you gentle ((hugs)) chickpea. TTC is such an up-and-down process. So full of hope during the first half of the cycle, and then... . Can you allow yourself a little cry, & then give yourself a treat? We're all allowed to have some down-time, don't beat yourself up.

Juju I think i know how you feel.. I'm 2dpiui and the cramping has stopped. I'm still rather boobilicious from the trigger & still slightly positive on a hpt. But apart from that...nothing. Zip. I keep having to remind myself that this is entirely normal, implantation hasn't occurred yet, so logically we wouldn't feel anything. Doesn't make it any easier though. I've had a txt from one of the few friends I've told to say that she's keeping all of her maternity stuff for me. Which is lovely, but aaarrrrrrgggggg!!!! I'm praying so hard that this works..