The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

chickpea

Morning all!

As I said, I'm 37. I was 30 when we got married, we started TTC#1 aged 31.5, and finally managed when I was nearly 35. I've been TTC#2 since Sept 09 aged 36, I'm now 37 and if I do get pg again, I'll be at least 38 when I give birth.

It wasn't meant to be this way! Denial is the thief of TTC time..

VK-2008 - time IS on your side, but on the other hand, it can run away from you so quickly, I'd start asking for more investigations.

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I'm on CD29, BFN, so just waiting for AF. Not officially late yet, last cycle was 30 days.

chickpea

ginvzt wrote: »

I am 31, OH 36 (37 in January). Have been trying for 3 years.

I was told I need to lose weight only for getting IVF referral - I had HCoSy, lap & dye (as HyCoSy was inconclusive) last summer, then 7 months on Clomid + 1 month on Letrozole (as I needed to lose 1kg more). My weight at the start of the year was 87.7, and the consultant wanted it to be below 80.6. Did that by June, referral issued, first visit to clinic July 21st, more blood tests, SA for OH, and I am on the first IVF cycle.

Sorry it's been such a saga - fingers crossed IVF is the answer. I presume after all the tests it's unexplained infertility?

chickpea

It is unfair, especially when you see 16 year old having babies just to get a flat. .[/QUOTE]

It can seem that way - there are a lot of pram-faced youngsters round our way (sorry!)

You just have to watch the human zoo that is the Jeremy Kyle show to establish that fertility is in inverse proportion to IQ!

The common denominator, to be serious, is their youth..

chickpea

liloandstitch wrote: »

DONT WORRY ABOUT YOUR FOLLICLE NUMBERS LADIES. It is the reserve they are talking about. Every month you get quite a few follicles but only usually one egg. All this tells you is that the NUMBERS of eggs are starting to reduce, and this is a lottery I am afraid, yes you can run out early, but those numbers are still quite good. She probably means that that is the number that you usually see in someone a little older - 36/37 ish rather than 30. WHAT IT DOESNT TELL YOU IS THE QUALITY OF THE EGGS) It is quite possible to have low eggs that are brilliant quality, as well as a large reserve of eggs of Poor quality. My last IVF was at age 39 1/2 and I got an A1 egg - the best you can get. It didnt stick unfortunately, although this was lucky because they discovered cervical cancer at the same time, but thats another story. So again, quality does not guarantee success. Every one is an individual and unique. If it preys on your mind, it may subconsciously make you believe that you wont get pregnant, and be careful of what you wish for cos it may come true. PMA at all times (Positive mental Attitude)

Sorry this post has been a lecture, didnt mean it to be.

Well done all of you that still have a PMA, and those that feel blue, take time out, dust yourself off, be very kind to yourself, and get back on the horse when you are ready. I REALLY believe that there will be a time for all of us, and that if we are patient and positive it will come.

It wasn't a lecture Lilo, just a pep talk and those are very helpful every now and again! Thanks for all the info - I'm brushing up on my PMA now!

ginvzt

chickpea wrote: »

Sorry it's been such a saga - fingers crossed IVF is the answer. I presume after all the tests it's unexplained infertility?

Yep, it is unexplained. Last SA that OH had, the consultant said he could get a medal for it (you should have seen OH's face afterwards, he was pleased, I have to say). I ovulate no problems, the tubes are clear, the lining fine, etc. Will see - maybe my eggs are rubbish - only time will show (well, and IVF procedures!)

It was so windy here tonight - we got a fence panel blown off (again - we had one last year - at least it is not the same one!). Trees are still standing (but if I knew they would not damage house/car by falling down, I would please for quite a few of them to go as it would save us getting some one to cut them down)

Update: The book offer is taken.

jujugaboo

I am 33 and OH is 37. I am fine but my OH has retrograde ejaculation (where the sperm goes into the bladder) he can have an op to have this put right but apparently he has got very poor mobility so ICSI is the only way for us. We have been trying for 3 years and it takes so long with appointment and tests etc we have now had 2 failed ICSIs.

chickpea

Well, bang on schedule, af is here - well first spotlets anyway. At least my LP is routinely 10 days+ now.

I'm not counting it as CD01, because the fertility specialist said only to count first day of full flow as CD01.

I just have to hope it stays at spotlets until Sunday at the earliest, so I can still do the FSH test @CD01/02.

++++++++

I had so many promising symptoms this month too (sore (0)(0)s, lower back pain, dizziness - I've said it before + I'll say it again, SSing is USELESS!!

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PMA time - a whole fresh month to try again! Great!

QQuaver

chickpea wrote: »

Well, bang on schedule, af is here - well first spotlets anyway. At least my LP is routinely 10 days+ now.

(((Hugs))).
Hope it'll stay spotty so that you can get your FSH test on time:o

Maddie

Hi all, just been reading and catching up. Am sat in the car in stratford as we're away for the weekend but its raining and OH has a headache so he's having a snooze.

Huge congrats to pagee!

Juju, so sorry the icsi didn't work out this time.

SK, good news that the waiting lists aren't too long, I'm waiting 4 months for my lap&dye. Wouldn't want it on Christmas eve though!

Chickpea, sorry the witch showed up. I'm gradually learning that all symptoms should be ignored. Every month seems to bring a new and more promising one though!

Lilo, thanks for the telling off maybe a need to be more positive, I've got to the point where I'm waiting for tests/help rather than being positive that we can do this on our own. Other than in the last few days of my cycle that is, when I convince myself that I'm preggars.

Ginzt, I may be wrong but I think the shoulder pain after a lap & dye is a transferred pain - the pressure is in your tummy but because of how your nerves are wired up, it feels like pain in your shoulder. Like how heart attacks give u pain in your left arm.

Well I visited a work friend this morn and her 3.5 month ivf baby, was quite proud of myself as I rocked him to sleep and managed to put in down in hid basket without him waking up. This weekend we're staying with a Uni friend who us 8 months pregnant. Luckily I'm at ov time - I think if AF was close or had just turned up I wouldn't be able to cope. Instead I'm hoping some of the luck rubs off on us

Hugs and good luck to all.

epsilondraconis

Hi all, I've not posted on here for a while, largely because nothing has really been happening on the baby-making front. It's great to read that there have been some successes; hopefully everyone will have at least one success at some point.

I must say I laughed at QQuaver's post where she mentioned that her partner thought IVF had a near 100% success rate on the first go. I have to confess that I also thought the same (being a bloke I hadn't quite understood how difficult it would be).

Anyway, a bit of history to recap. I'm 37, wife 34. Been TTC for 8 years and no success. Done ICSI once and although a good number of eggs were collected, none fertilised. They said it was likely due to the quality of the eggs and that they don't hold out much hope of us being successful. They said that we should give ICSI one more go; however if it didn't work then it was unlikely to work and we should conisder adoption. We're hoping to do a second ICSI in the coming months and have an appointment with the fertility specialist at our local hospital next week.

I've a couple of questions I'd be very grateful if someone could answer:

1. Does anyone know if there is a method of grading the quality of the eggs? At the IVF meeting we had after the IVF failed, they said they had no way of determining the quality of the eggs.

2. Is it possible to have more than one course of ICSI treatment conducted on the NHS? I originally thought it was only one; however when I looked online it appears you can have more, although it seems to be something of a postcode lottery as to how many courses of treatment you get free. (Looking at the news today, this is obviously likely to change in the coming months / years due to the cut backs.)

Why is all of this baby making stuff so difficult... sigh...

Thanks in advance for your feedback.