The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

jujugaboo

epsilondraconis wrote: »

Hi all, I've not posted on here for a while, largely because nothing has really been happening on the baby-making front. It's great to read that there have been some successes; hopefully everyone will have at least one success at some point.

I must say I laughed at QQuaver's post where she mentioned that her partner thought IVF had a near 100% success rate on the first go. I have to confess that I also thought the same (being a bloke I hadn't quite understood how difficult it would be).

Anyway, a bit of history to recap. I'm 37, wife 34. Been TTC for 8 years and no success. Done ICSI once and although a good number of eggs were collected, none fertilised. They said it was likely due to the quality of the eggs and that they don't hold out much hope of us being successful. They said that we should give ICSI one more go; however if it didn't work then it was unlikely to work and we should conisder adoption. We're hoping to do a second ICSI in the coming months and have an appointment with the fertility specialist at our local hospital next week.

I've a couple of questions I'd be very grateful if someone could answer:

1. Does anyone know if there is a method of grading the quality of the eggs? At the IVF meeting we had after the IVF failed, they said they had no way of determining the quality of the eggs.

2. Is it possible to have more than one course of ICSI treatment conducted on the NHS? I originally thought it was only one; however when I looked online it appears you can have more, although it seems to be something of a postcode lottery as to how many courses of treatment you get free. (Looking at the news today, this is obviously likely to change in the coming months / years due to the cut backs.)

Why is all of this baby making stuff so difficult... sigh...

Thanks in advance for your feedback.

I don't know much about egg quality but you had a good collection of eggs last time so maybe next time something will fertilse. I have had 2 ICSIs both on the NHS (next one I have to pay for). First time I only got 3 eggs and only one fertlised and second time I got 7 eggs and only fertilsed again, it seems my eggs are not particularly great some were abnormal and then they didn't like being injected. Second time round I had a B grade egg which they said was very good as they never give As but still didn't work. They said the abnormal eggs may just have been a one off because of the drugs. Good luck if you decide to try again, you never know it might work.....we all live in hope.

Does anybody know much or had experience of assisted hatching with IVF/ICSI?

epsilondraconis

Thanks jujugaboo. Yes we're going to give ICSI another go to see what happens. I think the thing that has struck me regarding all things medical is that in some cases the medical profession can appear to work wonders e.g. DNA analysis, brain surgery and yet there are other cases where, what to me appears to be a simple question, yet there seems to be few answers i.e. egg quality and improving the quality of eggs. I was just surprised when we had the last wash-up meeting with the IVF folk, the only hope seemed to be for us to try the ICSI process again to see what happens. I suppose I was just expecting miracles and hoping that someone somewhere had all of the answers.

My wife and I just watched the Take That programme on TV. I thought we had emotional issues. We feel quite normal now. We have tickets to go and see them next year and I must confess, I'm secretly quite looking forward to it...

chickpea

QQuaver wrote: »

Yipee!:j (Any chance AF won't come at all?)

Sadly no, QQ - I'm calling CD01!

I'll be waiting outside the hospital waiting for it to open tomorrow morning, then I'll take the Clomid - does anyone know if there is a *best* time of day to take it (in terms of efficacy, I don't care about side effects). Probably not?

++++++++

Sorry your eggs weren't up to the mark this month, how frustrating. Have you decided whether to take anything to affect onset of AF?

+++++++

Detoxing coming on a treat - I have been sober for 4 days now..!

Good luck everyone..

QQuaver

chickpea wrote: »

Sadly no, QQ - I'm calling CD01!

(((Hugs))):o

Clomid - does anyone know if there is a *best* time of day to take it (in terms of efficacy, I don't care about side effects). Probably not?

Don't know about efficacy.

Most people take it at night to avoid side effects, but when I was on 100mg, I was told to take one in the morning and one in the evening. Didn't have side effects on either case.

Sorry your eggs weren't up to the mark this month, how frustrating. Have you decided whether to take anything to affect onset of AF?

Don't know. I will decide nearer the time:o
DH is pretty much against it, but it's easy to change his mind - usually:p

Murray

Evening all.

Well, AF arrived for me too - CD2 today. It seems my cycles are getting longer too, I've jumped from 26-28 day cycles to 31 day cycles. I preferred the former, you get more bites at the cherry!

I've well and truly drowned my sorrows this weekend, an early night is needed tonight.

Sorry I cant help with your dilemma Q, I'm not really up to speed with these things yet.

M:)

liloandstitch

Im out too guys, CD1 for me today - and my appt is Thursday so an exciting week!

lilo

Murray

Sorry to hear that Lilo, AF has been busy this weekend. 10/10 for the PMA!


I've been wondering today because, for me, AF's stays have been getting shorter and shorter over the years and she usually only stops for about 2 days with only 1 or 1.5 days of proper flow. I've always seen that as a bonus but now I'm wondering if it might have something to do with our TTC problems?

jujugaboo

epsilondraconis wrote: »

Thanks jujugaboo. Yes we're going to give ICSI another go to see what happens. I think the thing that has struck me regarding all things medical is that in some cases the medical profession can appear to work wonders e.g. DNA analysis, brain surgery and yet there are other cases where, what to me appears to be a simple question, yet there seems to be few answers i.e. egg quality and improving the quality of eggs. I was just surprised when we had the last wash-up meeting with the IVF folk, the only hope seemed to be for us to try the ICSI process again to see what happens. I suppose I was just expecting miracles and hoping that someone somewhere had all of the answers.

My wife and I just watched the Take That programme on TV. I thought we had emotional issues. We feel quite normal now. We have tickets to go and see them next year and I must confess, I'm secretly quite looking forward to it...

I know what you mean by wishing that the Drs had all the answers, there seems to be very few answers to why isn't it working. Good luck on your next ICSI and I hope some fertilse for you both.

Very jealous that you are seeing Take That next, I went last year and it was brilliant.

Saw my SIL today and nephew and she started crying because she doesn't now what to say or help, so that started me off - there is nothing anyone can do its just up to mother nature and a little help of drugs etc. She is worried about having my nephew in my face after what we have been through, but I love him and hate for her to hide him away from me. Its hard but we carry on.

Maddie

Hi all, well I had a good weekend with my pregnant friend. Only time I real felt sad was when I went for a nosey in the nursery they are putting together, and I just felt so jealous. It makes it seem so simple and easy when others fall pregnant so quickly. If only it was so simple for all of us. Oh well we've got Christmas coming up as a good distraction along with our 2 year anniversary

QQuaver

Murray wrote: »

I've been wondering today because, for me, AF's stays have been getting shorter and shorter over the years and she usually only stops for about 2 days with only 1 or 1.5 days of proper flow. I've always seen that as a bonus but now I'm wondering if it might have something to do with our TTC problems?

Hmmm... How long is your luteal phase? Could it be short? (ie short LP = less stuff to shed?)

Maddie wrote: »

Only time I real felt sad was when I went for a nosey in the nursery they are putting together, and I just felt so jealous.

I'm seeing my friend who recently given birth to her second child later this month - I hope I can keep it together...