The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

tea_lover

Oh lucy what a nightmare!

I know it must be incredibly hard to see any positives right now but the thing that really stood out for me from your post was that all 4 eggs which weren't overheated fertilised! That's brilliant That gives you such a good chance - 1 or 2 put back tomorrow, and still a couple of potential frosties. I would have thought that any FET from those would be free because of their monuntal c*ck up.

Even if you have to make the horrible decision to write-off the overheated ones, you're definitely still in this xx.

Am sending massive hugs your way. I can't imagine how stressed you must be, it's not like ET is the calmest time of your life at the best of times!

I hadn't slept for nearly 48 hours when I got to that stage so can appreciate it's not great when all you want is to feel serene. Hopefully you have some lovely calming plans for this evening - am thinking a nice meal and an early night

Have everything crossed for you. Sounds like these embryos are real fighters xx.

angeltreats

Lucy - what a horrible, horrible thing for you to have to deal with It's already stressful enough to go through IVF without this. It's amazing that you still have four that didn't get overheated though and three that fertilised even though they were. I'm not making light of it but maybe there was a reason why you were able to produce so many eggs, fate or whatever, and it really does sound like those ones were little fighters. Everything crossed for you tomorrow. xxx

Ladies, can I just ask, if you've taken soy which days did you take it? I'm thinking CD 3 to 7 but I know some people take it on different days? Today is CD1.

tea_lover

I think AF is stuck! Am now CD40 which is kind of late, even though I'm irregular it's usually somewhere in the 30s. Thought I had some light spotting on monday but it didn't come to anything.

Nothing in me works!

We've got an appt booked to discuss an egg-sharing cycle at the end of sept. Am bricking it already. Relationsip issues aside (!) have heard so many heartbreaking IVF failure stories lately that I really don't know if I can do this again. I was a bit nervous last time but nothing like this, am terrified Not of the procedures themselves, it wasn't fun but I can cope with it. Am just so sad to hear how many people it's gone wrong for lately.

Sorry, that's a right downer again! Overall I'm honestly not feeling too bad today, just soooo scared at the thought of trying this again.

Part_Mouse

Lucy how awful for you, I can't belive you've had to go through all of that when its already stressful enough.huge hugs to you.

xx

time2deal

tea_lover wrote: »

I think AF is stuck! Am now CD40 which is kind of late, even though I'm irregular it's usually somewhere in the 30s. Thought I had some light spotting on monday but it didn't come to anything.

Nothing in me works!

We've got an appt booked to discuss an egg-sharing cycle at the end of sept. Am bricking it already. Relationsip issues aside (!) have heard so many heartbreaking IVF failure stories lately that I really don't know if I can do this again. I was a bit nervous last time but nothing like this, am terrified Not of the procedures themselves, it wasn't fun but I can cope with it. Am just so sad to hear how many people it's gone wrong for lately.

Sorry, that's a right downer again! Overall I'm honestly not feeling too bad today, just soooo scared at the thought of trying this again.

I know what you mean TL. There is no actual reason now (as of yesterday) that I can't start IVF properly, but I'm suddenly too scared to start. Last time I did it I knew we were only looking to get embryos and had so much else going on that there wasn't so much riding on it. Now it feels so much scarier if it doesn't work.

And I'm starting to doubt if its the right thing - but maybe that is just my fear talking! Its beginning to really hit home what 'risk of miscarriage' means - even in the best case scenario I'm looking at about a 32-35 week pregnancy. Is it fair for me to have a baby with such high risk factors? The point of TTC isn't to get pregnant, it's to have a child and help it grow up, and should I be taking a risk of giving it such a poor start in life.

There is so much emotion tied up in this process, and I feel I may not be strong enough right now for the rollercoaster.

AF has also gone missing for me. 14DPO today according to the other thread, so I was a bit early yesterday testing, but cramps all gone. Slight confusion as I think there was some bleeding with the surgeon poking around the other day, but not enough I don't think (unless he magically removed quite a lot in a tidy manner - which is possible. I'm not yet ready to call up and ask him!). My life has become so strange...

Whattodonow

Catching up over last few days...

Good luck Lucyloo!

clomid ladies - me and OH are unexplained and clomid didn;t work for me (in fact it sent my cycles crazy and effected my eyesight!) however there was a girl on here in exactly the same situation as me, and it worked for her. So it is worth trying I think, though I think I would have been happy with 4 months max rather than 6.

pinkteapot wrote: »

We're unexplained infertility - I have completely regular cycles and ovulate. DH's SA results were all normal. Sometimes I almost wish they'd found something wrong? We've been trying for over two years now and just don't know why little sperm and egg just don't want to get together. I have three months of Clomid to take, then a review appointment in December, then they'll do another three months. If they want to go ahead with the further three months I might quiz them on it, given what I've read about the apparent lack of benefits where there aren't any problems.

If we have to take Clomid for another three months after December it'll be coming up on three years of trying before we get onto the IVF waiting list.

You're just like me pinkteapot. Unexplained, over two years trying. Sometimes I think mother nature is trying to tell me and OH we aren't meant to be parents

Whattodonow

Tealover & Lucyloo, understand exactly what you mean about running away. My plan is, if IVF is unsucessful, to sell my house and take off in a campervan. Doing the 9-5 really feels pointless if i'm not going to have a family to support. This whole thing really makes you evaluate your life.

Welcome Sewit. Hope your stay is short and sweet

Good luck Mrs Happy, new business sounds intriguing!!

Whattodonow

Primmer - sorry to hear how down you are. I echo everyone else in saying a specialised infertility counsellor might help you come to terms with everything. I big hug to you xxx

Peonie wrote: »

I phoned the clinic to make sure they received the completed IVF eligibility funding questionnaire as I sent it 2 1/2 weeks ago. And we've got 2 funded cycles. Phew. They replied on the 31st June but we never received the letter. Hopefully we'll get the next one inviting us to the open evening.

Thanks for this. I just sent off my eligibility forms two days ago and was wondering when I would hear back. 2 funded cycles - I really was hoping it would be three - with the dodgy maths I was thinking if IVF works about a third of the time, three chances gives it the best shot. Can't complain I guess. Let us know when you get the next letter x

angeltreats

Whattodonow wrote: »

Thanks for this. I just sent off my eligibility forms two days ago and was wondering when I would hear back. 2 funded cycles - I really was hoping it would be three - with the dodgy maths I was thinking if IVF works about a third of the time, three chances gives it the best shot. Can't complain I guess. Let us know when you get the next letter x

Two cycles is great. Do you know why they gave you two funded cycles rather than three though?

If there's some sort of box ticking to be done, I will want to do my damndest to make sure all those boxes are ticked so we get maximum funding, if we possibly can. If it's BMI related and I have to starve for a few months to get my BMI under 25, so be it. Maximum in our PCT is three cycles but I don't know yet if you just get that automatically if you qualify, or if not everyone does.

Whattodonow

Jesus Lucy. I just read about what happened at the clinic. I can't believe it. After everything we go through, you don't even think something like that could happen. That is massively stressful.

I'm - and I'm sure us all - have massive faith in those 4 unaffected embies. Come on embies!

Let us know how you get on chick
xxxxxxxx