The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

ginvzt

Ok, so when are we meeting in Blackpool to go and stroke that statue? I am not too far, but have to keep quiet from OH, as he will laugh so loud, neighbours might thing something is wrong with us! But - I don't care, if it works, I am willing to try!

My mum and dad used to hint about it being time for children and my dad will say he ahd a dream about grandchildren and such, and I would just shrug and say who's child was it as I have brother and sister (both younger and unmarried). I did tell them that we were trying when I started going through the investigations, as I wanted to fin out if there was anything in the family similar.

Mother in law was not so subtle - couple of days after wedding we were told to start taking folic acid (I was shocked, but pretended not to understand as she said in Italian to my OH at dinner table in the restaurant). I know, I told this a few times, but it never stops shocking me her insensitivity...

spaghetti_monster

I think I'm lucky with my family and parents/parent-in-law. I really feel for those who have such insensitive family - as if the pressures/upset of ttc were not enough!
Although I find I do keep things back from my Mum - she knows about the mc and that I'm basically OK now, but none of the more recent details (strange periods, visits to the hospital etc). Somehow, I think she's be worried, would keep asking things and magnify my worries IYSWIM.

Granny came up with a corker after my mc, telling me I "shouldn't go charging around on that bicycle" :eek:

angelavdavis

Hi everyone,

Somnium and FE - great to hear your updates.

Re Inlaws. I have always got on pretty well with mine, until my failed ICSI a couple of months ago, they haven't stopped going on and on about us retrying. I found the whole process very traumatising so will NOT be going there for a good while at least. OH had to eventually tell them to stop their nagging. I swear I would have said something upsetting to everyone and didn't want to go there.

We are due to go and see them in a few weeks and I am so dreading it.

jiblets1

dizzi, please don't feel that you are being punished for your abortion. I know it's a sensitive issue, and people have varying feelings about it. Personally, I am quite aware that people have their reasons for having abortions, and I really believe that it's a very personal decision and people shouldn't try to have an opinion on something that (as long as the decision is not taken lightly) is only up to the people directly involved.

A friend of mine had an abortion when she was 18, and when ttcing recently she became pregnant and miscarried. She too was adamant that she was being punished, and found the whole thing difficult to deal with (especially as her husband was unaware of it). She is now 8 months pregnant, after falling pregnant again only a few months after the miscarriage.

Provided nothing went physically wrong with you during the abortion, the only effect it may have on you now is if you beat yourself up about it. Please don't forget that stress can have a real effect on fertility, and you seem to have a lot of it. All this playing on your mind, planning a wedding, dealing with your mother is an awful amount to deal with, and I really hope you find a way to ease your stresses.

And additionally, the fact that you care so much about whether or not you would be a good mother leaves no doubt in my mind that you would be.

ginvzt

Ok, chin up everyone! We need good vibes and to be happy...

I had my pre-op assessment today. Was worried that they will cancel it because of my swine flu, but after few phone calls, I was told that as long as I have no symptoms now, the laparoscopy is on! (Unless bloods or MRSA swabs show something wrong...) So, I need to arrive to hospital at 1pm on Friday. Was going to send OH to work, so he doesn't waste his annual leave, but will see how it goes.

On the swine flu front - I am feeling absolutely fine, the fever was gone the next day and apart from tiredness (whis is always with me regardless of swine flu), I had no problems. So, back to work tomorrow....

MadMac_2

Ginvst, I have been feeling hot and aches from head to foot since Friday - headaches, sore throat, poor voice and sniffles and sneezing, but finally took my temperature today and it was only 99F. So I was wondering whether it is swine flu as I ache so much!

But you are obviously more in the know that me and I don't feel too awful today now! What do you reckon?

liloandstitch

Yay, go ginvzt, brilliant news, both surviving swine flu and the lap on Friday. Hopefully with this all out of the way you will be joining the graduates shortly.

Dizzi, how awful to have to deal with. Your mum sounds really difficult to deal with. Huge hugs. And I have to say how brave of you to recognise the situation you were in and have an abortion. I think it took more guts to take this decision than go along with it and bring it into the world in an abusive relationship. There is no way you deserve any form of punishment for any of it. It sounds as if you have really been through the mill - hopefully your luck is now changing and it will be onwards and upwards now.

If we have a MSE jaunt to Blackpool, I shall be joining you I think, I like the sound of a fertility statue!!!

To everyone else, glad you are well!

I went back to work today, for the first time in 6 months so I am an exhausted little bunny even though I only did about an hour!! Still its another step on the route to normality so I am also a chuffed little bunny!

Have a good week, I am away for a few days so will catch up on Friday

Lilo

Bunnie1982

Good news about returning to work Lilo.

I'm feeling positive today, does help that I've got 3 job interviews lined up for tomorrow - one that I'm really keen on. Just got to work out the logistics in my mind about getting to them all, lol.

Mine and DH relationship feels real strong just lately, the strongest it has been for quite some time so I'm hoping our little miracle happens - right time and right place etc.

Sending lots of baby dust to everyone tonight

ginvzt

Bunnie1982 wrote: »

Good news about returning to work Lilo.

I'm feeling positive today, does help that I've got 3 job interviews lined up for tomorrow - one that I'm really keen on. Just got to work out the logistics in my mind about getting to them all, lol.

Wow, 3 job interviews in one day!!!! That is fantastic!!!! I wish you all the best - show them that you are the best!!!!

MadMac wrote: »

Ginvst, I have been feeling hot and aches from head to foot since Friday - headaches, sore throat, poor voice and sniffles and sneezing, but finally took my temperature today and it was only 99F. So I was wondering whether it is swine flu as I ache so much!

But you are obviously more in the know that me and I don't feel too awful today now! What do you reckon?

I was really bad on Thrusday, with headache, hot flushes, muscle aches, etc and when I took my temperature it was 38.4!!!! (Sorry, I can't do Fahrenheit, but google tells me it is abut 101?) If I were you, I would give a call to GP, as even if it might not be swine flu, it might be something else - and better to find out sooner than later.

I am back to work today. We went out for a meal with OH's brother last night and it was obviously too much of 3 courses of Thai food for me after barely eating anything for the last week or so, so I woke up with a headache and a very full stomach. Anyway - back to normal today, as OH's brother is going back home!

jiblets1

I'm a bit fed up today. I'm on CD 35 and I feel really cross. My consultant told me that she thought I might have a regular 28 day cycle on my clomid, and the first cycle was 30 days. So I got it in my head that every clomid cycle would be the same length. Then here I am, day 35 and not even a hint of PMT yet. I've got 2 negative tests under my belt and am just fed up.
I've had an awful lot of stress recently (haven't we all...) and that has often disrupted my cycles before, but I thought in the battle of body vs chemicals the chemicals would win. I guess not.