Diary of a broken gambler

MicheH

Amiga, Amiga, Amiga. Mate we had our OR interviews the same day, We've a connection you see. I have an addiction, laugh all you will but i'm an emotional eater. There are people who laugh at me and I don't get the support I need when I need it. I know why I eat like that it's a coping mechanism. Coping. Your having a S*it day, you're trying to cope, cope, that's all. You're trying to forget this horrile time. Your father (don't know ifI should say this but I feel I have to) Your father knows what he is doing, any body that writes a letter like that is out to hurt the recipient. Why he wants to hurt I don't know. You don't need to know either cos it's irrelevant, it doesn't matter to you and you now and you feeling ok again. Listen mate, i'm no councillor, I might even be saying the absolute wrong thing that will push you into doing what you really want to do. I hope not. You've got your life back, yeah it's not working out at the minute but life isn't kak all the time, something will turn up. Something will. Try to not give into doing what you really want to do right now. You can cope without that. You can cope. You can sit this out and reap the rewards when stuff is better for you. PLease cope x

Amiga

Thanks Miche

I must say you seem to be coping with the BR a lot better than I am!

I am not going to do anything stupid yet, saying that I have a birthday coming up in a few days and that will not be a happy time

How you doing in general with it all? Sunk in yet?

tigerfeet2006

post on the Gamcare forum and chat room then.They also do the talk to a councillor live online. Explain you haven't got transport so can't get anywhere and just need some support.

(((hugs)))

MicheH

Amiga wrote: »

Thanks Miche

I must say you seem to be coping with the BR a lot better than I am!

I am not going to do anything stupid yet, saying that I have a birthday coming up in a few days and that will not be a happy time

How you doing in general with it all? Sunk in yet?

Amiga, I have my up days and down days, Should have seen me last Friday and Saturday. I'm dealing with panicky feelings relating to losing DH from my childhood and a complete loss of security. I feel like we could lose our home at any time. I am in a mess and I do need help with it all but I refuse to get help as I don't want any of it on my medical records so have to just muddle on. The bankruptcy is there all the time, sometimes I feel like its all in the past and we're through and other times I feel like it's going to bite us in the bum, I guess your awful experience of your job today is proof that it probably will bite us in the bum.

Noofywoo

Amiga,

Your Father should be proud of you for seeking help and for finding a job. I know it won't bring in any money but perhaps while you are looking for a paid job you could volunteer at a local hospital or charity shop. It would get you out the house and make your day go a bit quicker, plus you would have a bit of company. Good luck with the job hunting.

Take Care

Noofy

Bethankim

Amiga,

M'lovely as mich and others have said hang in there treacle and hope you get some support soon
although not a gambler i do understand about addiction, Like Mich im an emotional eater - I have a love hate relationship with food.

I have sat here and polished off a whole pack of fish fingers, half a loaf of bread and a packet of biscuits..because im feeling down, and a bit of a failure again.
I know there is help out there, but i havent really truly admitted til recently i have a problem

As for your dad, im sorry treacle, I really hope you get a break soon and a little ray of light gets in. be kind to yourself and the difference is you havent gambled, you have strength.

B
x

fiveyearplan

Amiga wrote: »

Alas Tiger I have no OH, not many ladies go for losers with gambling and debt problems these days I also wouldn't mind at all wining the lotto and paying back what I owe, even if I won just enough to repay the debts and the OR fees I would be over the moon!

I'll be more than happy to safeguard any winning lottery tickets for you. Say you bought them for me as a gift.

Amiga

Thanks again guys. Good idea Noofy, I know there is a small charity shop in town, I will go there tomorrow and ask to help out a little.

No my dad is a odd old chap. He just plain doesn't like me, which is sad but there you go. He told the entire town I was gay as I am nearly 32 and never been married ( he sees past the fact I have no self esteem and I am quite a ugly looking chap) He just puts me down at all times. I have got used to him and actually don't want a relationship with him. Just wish he would leave me in peace.

Sorry to hear you are feeling down Beth, whatever we are addicted to it's horrible. Gambling got me as I have no self esteem and was bored, I wanted excitement. After I lost a small sum compared to what I went BR with, I gambled more and more to win back the original lost. It soon grew into a stupidly large sum

I don't have the money to do the lottery fiveyear otherwise you would have yourself a deal

tigerfeet2006

That is a very good idea Noofy, it will look really good on your CV as well Amiga.

fiveyearplan

Amiga - I'm so sorry to hear of your low self esteem and can't believe that you are 'quite an ugly chap'. That really breaks my heart that someone feels that way about themselves. Have you sought counselling or a support group for your self esteem?

FYP x