Partner moving in and DLA or not?

SuziQ

_shel wrote: »

IF your kids get a diagnosis then apply, I woudnt suggest applying for DLA until then because at the minute they do not have a disability.

A statement of educational needs may not be enough on its own to claim DLA as this is not a diagnosed disability. It may suggest your kids have some autistic tendencies, educational behavioural needs or something else, but this is still not a diagnosis that can only be done by a medical proffessional, the statement is done by a social worker who is not qualified to diagnois but can refer to someone who can.

Though if they get a statement it can be used to support an application for DLA if they also have a disability so wait until you have both of them done and get some help with the forms from CAB or welfare rights.

You do not have to have a diagnosed disability to claim DLA! My youngest was first granted it 2 years before his diagnosis of ASD. Both my god-daughters get DLA on care needs-hrc and lrm-neither has an actual diagnosis yet though my son does.I also have a very good friend with a disabled child,where despite going to america having exhausted Great ormond street etc they have been unable to give a diagnosis for her child's severe disability which prevents her even walking-they have said she will probably never be diagnosed but will always be disabled.It is granted on the care someone needs (and/or mobility needs),not the condition.
OP I pm'd you yesterday about this. My advice is NOT to wait to apply as that could mean you missing out on months of benefit. As it is you get 6 weeks from getting the forms to needing to return them-if you get them in by the day on the form it will be backdated to that date if they are allocated DLA. Six weeks should be plenty of time for you to get some sound advice about how to fill in the form etc. I did my own forms-had filled in loads for other people when I was Health Visiting but found it daunting to fill one in for my own child-but there are lots of local support groups who have experienced workers who could help you,or an expereienced welfare rights officer at CAB.Even if you have to wait 2 weeks for a n appointment it's worth it.
It can be a difficult benefit to get and the forms are difficult-they make you concetrate on what your child can't do/the negative side of life with your child which can be quite upsetting,as parents we like to be positive about our kids,but you need to give a good range of what life is really like with your child and of the bad days,how often do they occur etc. DLA didn't even contact my son's specialist-they went on the form,my statement at the back and the statement of my childs SENCO. I got a decision in less than 3 weeks last July.

http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=528&a=3330

If you are claiming for an ill or disabled child

Your child must need a lot more help or supervision than other children of the same age.
You can claim for care needs before a child is aged three months, but benefit will not be paid before the child reaches the age of three months unless they are paid under 'special rules' (see below).

You can claim for mobility needs from:

• age three, if your child is unable, or virtually unable, to walk
• age three, if your child is assessed to be both 100% disabled because of loss of eyesight and not less than 80% disabled because of deafness
• age three, if your child is severely mentally impaired with severe behavioural problems and qualifies for the highest rate of care component
• age five, if your child needs guidance or supervision when walking out of doors

delain

Thank you for your PM took me a while to work out how to get to it! I have made an appointment to discuss it with the SENCO at their school! The problem is they are very different at school, its when they are at home together that their issues really kick off.

[Deleted User]

I didnt say there had to be a diagnosis to claim but it is a big factor. We help parents apply for kids who have lots of problems, illness, behaviour, psych. that they should not be having at the age they are. We find a great proportion of them coming back declined and going through appeals, tribunials etc with DCS saying they are naughty kids not that they need care. But when they apply after diagnosis or if it comes mid way through the process the claims are being accepted or they back down on their original decision on receipt of the doc's diagnosis and/or statement of educational needs of which the op has not got.

[Deleted User]

delain wrote: »

Sadly it doesn't work out that way as the way the DWP see it he should be handing over every penny he earns to me as soon as he gets it and screw the CC!

As i live in a private rented house every £1 we get above the legal bare minimum is taken off the housing benefit, meaning that we would have less money together as a couple than i get on my own now as i'd lose £100 a week.

i realise that looks grasping but i have got 3 children to support with sod all help from their dad and it seems that even if i found a job tomorrow and we were both working we would be worse off still!

Have you been on the the CSA re their dad? You could get something there if he's working? It's about £5 if not, theres a CSA board here with more info on.

How about Tax Creadits? If your partner moves in you could claim as a couple? If/When the kids get DLA you would get more and help for child care if you manage to find a job. Your partner could also get something from work, you say he works for the council? Most councils have really good child care voucher schemes, loans for cars/bus passes and other stuff, tell him to check it out.

Does seem the 'system' is designed as if they want people to stay single and or jobless if they want to survive.

SuziQ

delain wrote: »

Thank you for your PM took me a while to work out how to get to it! I have made an appointment to discuss it with the SENCO at their school! The problem is they are very different at school, its when they are at home together that their issues really kick off.

My son was also much worse at home tha at school-for instance night times are literally a nightmare with him wondering the house and taking electrical equipment apart if he is unsupervised,I can't lock his door as I don't believe in that and also think it a massive safety no-no (he would also shout and scream the house down if I did it!). There are 3 levels of care so they will decide which if any apply to your children.

delain

I am lucky not to have that particular problem, but we do live in a small house so they have bunk beds and one threw the other off the top bunk bed, and one one occasion i was woken at 5am because one had bitten the other on the face! I have managed (with help) to cut right down on their routine issues. Before, to get to the bus stop to go to school they had to pick 2 flowers, walk a certain path and count all the fence posts on the way which used to drive me nuts!:eek:

delain

_shel wrote: »

Have you been on the the CSA re their dad? You could get something there if he's working? It's about £5 if not, theres a CSA board here with more info on.

How about Tax Creadits? If your partner moves in you could claim as a couple? If/When the kids get DLA you would get more and help for child care if you manage to find a job. Your partner could also get something from work, you say he works for the council? Most councils have really good child care voucher schemes, loans for cars/bus passes and other stuff, tell him to check it out.

Does seem the 'system' is designed as if they want people to stay single and or jobless if they want to survive.

Their Dad is self employed doing small time commercial fishing, and fiddles his income to look like he has nothing. I had to stop him seeing the children as had so many problems with his psychotic behavior both towards me, the social workers and my solicitor up to and including insulting the family court judge in an email 2 my solicitor in which he also said he would cut the brake pipes on her car!

To be honest i think we're better off if he has no claim on us!

We looked at the tax credits on entitledto and we were told I'd get £62 a week in tax credits and child benefit and we'd have to pay £50 month rent and £10 council tax and his earnings are not enough to feed us all and pay the bills

seven-day-weekend

The thing is, we are busy discussing here whether having someone stay over, receiving their post, having car insurance with them etc is classed as 'a couple' for benefit purposes and some have said that it's 'unfair' that people on benefits are not allowed a relationship.

But this is not the case is it? No one has actually suggested another alternative, which is don't have them stay over, don't receive their post, don't go on their car insurance - i.e. just be boyfriend and girlfriend and go out togther, or visit and then go home.That's having a relationship without being classed as a couple..

If you are doing the things a couple do, you will be classed as a couple. Fair enough I think!

delain

I've told him he has to change all his post, the car insurance is the only thing i need, however we are thinking about claiming together, hence the post. I just wanted advice about what happen, and whether not i should say yes i know you love me and the kids but you can only see us on a friday until your credit card is cleared!!

mandij30

interesting read.... I do think its unfair on those of us in new relationships.

I'm a divorced mum of 2, working part time and recieving working & child tax credits, I am getting help with Rent and council tax ( housing & council Tax benefit) Now I have only been with my partner 7 months, He is unemployed and on JSA living at hes parents home. He lives in a different part of the country to me, so I only get to see him twice a month for the weekends, when my kids are with there dad. He doesn't pay anything towards my household, and doesn't have post delivered here. Now would I be classed as living like a couple ?? Its too soon for him to move in with me.

Would I be penalised for having him stay with me 4 nights a month, I can hardly go stay at hes mums for the weekend, and he's over 200 miles away from me.

I wondered where I stood and who I should inform, as we aren't living together as a couple, we are just dating