Partner moving in and DLA or not?

Breast_Cancer_Survivor

mandij30 wrote: »

Maybe so, but how are we mean't to progress in a relationship if we don't get to see them. I wish I could see more of him, i'm having to interact with him over the net on a daily basis, just to keep our relationship going.

The tax credits hotline is unhelpful as it just says you need to tell us if there is a change in your circumstances, I.E (a partner moves in with you) well as he hasn't, and wont be for a while yet.

Its all unclear to me, and I don't want to get in any trouble.

Exactly, if you were not claiming any benefits you wouldnt have to rush your relationship, you could let it develop naturally but because you do you are expected to move them into your home or not see them.

If the DWP come back & confirm that they are going to stop my benefits I shall be fighting them all the way, just cos I was unfortunate enough to end up a single parent shouldn't mean I have no human rights.

delain

Breast_Cancer_Survivor wrote: »

It's alot harder to find babysitters when you have Autistic kids & I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving mine with someone I didnt know, from experience even my family struggle with my boys behavior.

fortunately my family are very good with them, but as i'm only 24 my mum and nan still work and are not available as on-tap childcare for me to work!

some people just don't get this :rolleyes:

delain

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

The thing is, we are busy discussing here whether having someone stay over, receiving their post, having car insurance with them etc is classed as 'a couple' for benefit purposes and some have said that it's 'unfair' that people on benefits are not allowed a relationship.

But this is not the case is it? No one has actually suggested another alternative, which is don't have them stay over, don't receive their post, don't go on their car insurance - i.e. just be boyfriend and girlfriend and go out togther, or visit and then go home.That's having a relationship without being classed as a couple..

If you are doing the things a couple do, you will be classed as a couple. Fair enough I think!

I also feel i should say that i feel this means the government think that the best thing for young families is for young mums to behave like slappers and not be able to form loving meaningful relationships (which can only benefit the children involve) without being unable to afford even the basics for the kids??

As i said before i don't smoke or drink and i do my best for the kids, but i'll be penalised because my LHA sold all the council houses and my rent is high!

Breast_Cancer_Survivor

delain wrote: »

I also feel i should say that i feel this means the government think that the best thing for young families is for young mums to behave like slappers and not be able to form loving meaningful relationships (which can only benefit the children involve) without being unable to afford even the basics for the kids??

As i said before i don't smoke or drink and i do my best for the kids, but i'll be penalised because my LHA sold all the council houses and my rent is high!

I completely agree, although at 36 I doubt id be considered a young mum (lol).

I know the DWP are trying to cut back on the high Social expenditure but I really feel they are choosing the wrong area to concentrate on.

Surely the people that work for cash in hand & claim benefits should be higher on the agenda.

We wouldn't be in this mess if Labour hadn't let so many imigrants into our Country to claim benefits, run our NHS into the ground & take up all our coucil houses.

krisskross

Breast_Cancer_Survivor wrote: »

We wouldn't be in this mess if Labour hadn't let so many imigrants into our Country to claim benefits, run our NHS into the ground & take up all our coucil houses.

This is very naughty. Perhaps we could also say if there weren't so many single parents then there would be enough homes to go round, and the welfare bill would be much less.

IF you and your children were starving or in fear of your lives then wouldn't you be looking for a friendlier place to live? You were fortunate enough to be born in a country that is prepared to support you and your childrens existences to a reasonably comfortable standard, courtesy of the taxpayers without you having to lift a finger. Do not begrudge those so much worse off than yourself.

I actually had some sympathy for you before you started the BNP racist claptrap.

mandij30

krisskross wrote: »

This is very naughty. Perhaps we could also say if there weren't so many single parents then there would be enough homes to go round, and the welfare bill would be much less.

IF you and your children were starving or in fear of your lives then wouldn't you be looking for a friendlier place to live? You were fortunate enough to be born in a country that is prepared to support you and your childrens existences to a reasonably comfortable standard, courtesy of the taxpayers without you having to lift a finger. Do not begrudge those so much worse off than yourself.

I actually had some sympathy for you before you started the BNP racist claptrap.

How very insulting Krisskross

Not all of us single parents chose to be that way, Its our partners that left us, causing us to be single parents.

I was married to my childrens dad for 14 yrs, and in all that time working full time and not claiming anything ( even though I would of been entitled to some help) Then My husband left me with 2 kids and not paying anything towards them. So of course now I only claim what I am entitled to, I don't abuse the system and I want to set a positive role model to my kids that mummy doesnt sit at home all day on benefits.

However I do have to agree with Breast cancer survivor over the last few yrs immigration is becomming a problem, I see it first hand being in the Public sector, I don't begrudge anyone fleeing from genuine persecution in their country, but I'd expect them to contribute towards this country.

This country is far too Lenient, and those born here are often put at the back of the queue. Not only the young, but the old also.

And just because we speak out against it we are branded racist or Bnp supporters. Seriously open your eyes to whats going on around you, before you begin criticising others

delain

I haven't said anything racist, just that the LHA should not have sold everything!:cool:

Also I did not choose to be a single parent either! No sane person would.

mealone

There has to be a line where you are classed as a couple and the public purse stopes supporting you, where do you think it should be?

Breast_Cancer_Survivor

mealone wrote: »

There has to be a line where you are classed as a couple and the public purse stopes supporting you, where do you think it should be?

Personally myself I think if you have been with someone for say 12 months thats kind of stable & I would think about letting them move in but everyone is different.

I know some single mums maybe do commit fraud but the majority of us are honest & hardworking and only in this situation through circumstances out of our control.

Ive worked all my life until my husband & I split which coincidentally is when my mental health deteriated to the degree that I was unable to physically leave the house let alone go to work.

alwaysonthego_2

mandij30 wrote: »

How very insulting Krisskross She was only giving an example of the clap trap that the previous poster was spouting

Not all of us single parents chose to be that way, Its our partners that left us, causing us to be single parents.

However I do have to agree with Breast cancer survivor over the last few yrs immigration is becomming a problem, I see it first hand being in the Public sector, I don't begrudge anyone fleeing from genuine persecution in their country, but I'd expect them to contribute towards this country.I think that you don't realise that most immigrants do not recourse to public funds so are not entitled to any benefits and the majority of them work taking the jobs that Briish job seekers claiming benefits refuse to do, so they contribute to tax and NI conts.

This country is far too Lenient, and those born here are often put at the back of the queue. Not only the young, but the old also.yawn yawn

And just because we speak out against it we are branded racist or Bnp supporters. Seriously open your eyes to whats going on around you, before you begin criticising others you are being racist as you are only believing what they print in the red top newspapers (sun/daily mail)

Please can we refrain from talking about immigration as it has no relivance to this topic.