Inappropriate comments from teaching assistant

kjmtidea

Just because I am concerned about my children doesn't mean that I am worked up, I wanted peoples opinions on the situation that's all. I personally don't believe that my children should have to deal with this, there was no reason for the t.a. to say what she did, no reason at all.

Idiophreak

madnessandmayhem wrote: »

Hi,
I have to say i agree that the TA could have chosen her words a bit better-'if you don't wear suncream you will get sunburn' sort of thing ...........

Not always the case, though, is it? - I thought darker skinned people don't really burn that much...

Odds on, the only reason they actually wanted them to put the sunscreen on is so they weren't marked out as being different. Guess the TA was just trying to provide some justification for asking them to put sunblock on...

brownbabygirl

kjmtidea wrote: »

Just because I am concerned about my children doesn't mean that I am worked up, I wanted peoples opinions on the situation that's all. I personally don't believe that my children should have to deal with this, there was no reason for the t.a. to say what she did, no reason at all.

kjmtidea wrote: »

Am I over reacting?

you are implying you arent over reacting so you answered your own question. case closed?

poet123

Ask yourself honestly if you have ever said something that could be construed, with hindsight (which is a wonderful thing!) as a bit "foot in mouth", and then ask yourself did anyone take it so seriously that it could ultimately cost your job, or at the very least make people who are only aware of the veiled allegation, and not the the substance of the complaint, view your askance.?

madnessandmayhem

Idiophreak wrote: »

Not always the case, though, is it? - I thought darker skinned people don't really burn that much...

Odds on, the only reason they actually wanted them to put the sunscreen on is so they weren't marked out as being different. Guess the TA was just trying to provide some justification for asking them to put sunblock on...

I wasn't saying that people with darker skin would get badly burned, but the TA clearly thought so, by giving as justification to the op's son for wearing sunscreen-which if you read back was what happened. I was merely trying to suggest that different wording could have been used so as not to be so offensive.

To the OP- i know how we all want to protect our children, but in reality we can't do that every day for the rest of their lives-I feel fiercley protective of my son at school, and it hasn't been helped by his teacher for this year suggesting that he has aspergers because he likes his little routines, and is incredibly bright-and i have had days of not wanting him to go to school in case he is being treated differently. But at the nd of the day i think it gets to me and upsets me, and i end up making it a bigger deal than it actually is-i'm not quite wording this right, but hopefully you know what I mean!! Quite rightly you should voice your concerns, but I really think that no offense was meant on the TA's part, but hopfully that will be the end of it now!


p.s I have had my son seen over the course of the year, and he does NOT have anything wrong with him-one dr's words were 'if i had just spent time with him, without you explaining what the school have said, i'd hav thought you were an over anxious mother and wondered why on earth you were bringing him to me!!'-i didn't actually think there ws anything wrong, but wanted it confirmed!!!! just in case people thought i was in denial!!!

kernewek

It sounds to me like the OP has been fobbed off a little bit here. To be told that the head teacher cannot do anything is complete rubbish. In a school the head does all the hiring, firing, suspending and disciplining and is completely repsonsible for this. Decisions have to go through governors but this is purely to ratify the head's decision and are a formality.

I suspect the head may fear a backlash from the unions but to me the comments are unacceptable and I think at the least the TA concerned should receive a formal warning.

Teachers work hard to try to dispel prejudices and comments like these towards students just undermine what they are trying to achieve.

Personally I would threaten to speak to the LA responsible if the head doesn't take appropriate action. Don't bother with the governers as they will just back the head.

However, be sure of what you are doing and that the comments are accurate as it is someone's livelyhood you are threatening.

pelirocco

I wouldnt be so much concerned with the possible racist comments at to the obviously poorly educated TA !! what other half baked ideas does he or she have?

Idiophreak

pelirocco wrote: »

I wouldnt be so much concerned with the possible racist comments at to the obviously poorly educated TA !! what other half baked ideas does he or she have?

I don't really follow.

Seems TA was talking about someone they knew who was dark skinned, got sun damage and ended up losing some of their pigmentation...

I don't see what's half baked or poorly educated about that?

Bettyboop

poet123 wrote: »

Ask yourself honestly if you have ever said somehting that could be construed with hindsight (which is a wonderful thing!) as a bit "foot in mouth", and then ask yourself did anyone take it so seriously that it could ultimately cost your job, or at the very least make people who are only aware of the veiled allegation, and the the sustance of the complaint, view your askance.?

I can relate to this...once looking at a photo of someone I said you look thinner now than you did then . Another time I was complaining to a lady down the road that I would like to get hold of the cat (not literally) that kept soiling in my garden... and she said oh and described it. Turned out it was her cat :eek:.

In my first job a very long time ago I spoke to a person who was going through a s*x change but I couldn't address him as a her until fully completed apparently... he was offended but our records showed it was a man so the conversation was Mr ----. It was awkward but sometimes you cannot use different/words phrases!

rosebyanyothername

i find my dark skinned children get sun burnt esp on face and need small amount of lotion. But I actually worried more when people presumed because they were black they did not need it...and comment s were made like oh you people love the sun dont you and of course your skin is used to the sun. Excuse me but we have lived here all our lives and can get burnt or get sunstroke too as well as pale people. Considering the lack of sun we get in britain it is a shock to anyones system to feel the warmth. People do say things the wrong way esp if they are not thinking When my children started at the local welsh shcool they were told by one teacher that their skin was brown because they came from africa. That seems a bit odd seeing as eveyone is meant to have been descended from africa. The other children also found it interesting that we had white palms and commented on this! Mydaughterr was also told that she looked ugly when she had an afro hair style. But my children told me these thing s and I reinforced what I have always said re skin colour and our heritage. IT is your reaction to other peoples comments that matters not the comment itself.