Inappropriate comments from teaching assistant

Bitsy_Beans

I just think she's a bit thick TBH (the TA not the OP )
she clearly has no idea that her comments could be construed as a bit offensive. Not sure what you can do to change that though. Some people think before they open their mouth, others don't. She seems to be in the latter.

MrsAnnie

burnsguitarman wrote: »

Personally I think you're making a mountain out of a mole hill, It sounds as if YOU have a problem with skin colour and are passing it on to your children by making a fuss, I'm sure your'e children will suffer much worse than this during their childhood! Don't take this the wrong way but it is just my opinion. All children have adverse comments made about them even if its because they have red hair, black skin, thin, fat, small, tall, or anything else! Granted the TA should have known that it may cause offence in these polictically correct days.

Fair enough, but just because children can be picked on for anything does not make it acceptable.

Attacking someone for the colour of their skin etc. is attacking who they are, their genetic makeup, their ancestry, the list could go on. And unfactual comments such as 'make sure he wears sun cream because otherwise he will turn white' is just ludicrous coming from a TA! They are in a position of caring for children, moulding them into educated young adults and are in a position of authority and trust. I know I would be complaining to the head teacher.

pinkshoes

jellyhead wrote: »

I don't understand the first comment to be honest - is she saying that all brown skinned children look the same so she can't tell them apart? 2 children with brown skin in the same class seems like enough not to think of it as a 'rarity' anyhow.

I remember a scenario on TV in a studio, where they staged a bag snatching, where a black man ran in, snatched someone's bag, then ran out. They asked all the people in the room individually to give a description of the thief. All the black people in the room could describe the thief in incredible detail, yet all the white people could manage is "er... black"!

"White" people generally have a variety of hair/eye colours, therefore many "white" people find it much harder to distinguish between black people, whose "basic" features (hair, eye colour, skin tone) tend to be similar.

"Black" people on the other hand, who no doubt have family members of the same skin tone, hair colour, and eye tone, are much more talented at identifying people my other means.

This is no excuse for the teacher not remembering the kid's name, but it does sound to me she just got him confused, and picked a bad selection of words! It doesn't sound like it was intentionally about race. People generally just refer to people by something that makes them stand out. At work, I'm referred to as "the girl", as I'm the only one...

Quasar

The thing I find worrying though, is that nowadays people should find the expression "brown skin" to be offensive. Or "black skin" for example. These are merely descriptive of one person's appearance, like short or long hair, eye colour etc.

In my place of work I have often been referred to as "the foreigner" by people who do not know my name, because I DO have a clear foreign accent. It is a fact. It doesn't diminish me as a person and therefore I'm not offended by being referred to in that way.

Now, if the description were given in an offensive context then I would find it objectionable, but when given as a mere matter of fact, I don't see it as a problem.

brownbabygirl

Quasar wrote: »

The thing I find worrying though, is that nowadays people should find the expression "brown skin" to be offensive. Or "black skin" for example. These are merely descriptive of one person's appearance, like short or long hair, eye colour etc.

Thanks! Speaking as a black/brown lady as well.:j:j:j

Quasar

brownbabygirl wrote: »

Thanks! Speaking as a black/brown lady as well.:j:j:j

Actually I happen to be white - a chance of birth of course. Human skin is beautiful: its texture and smoothness truly shine when one is healthy. Its varying colours are to be celebrated, not seen as divisive. Black is beautiful. Brown is beautiful. White is beautiful too. Accents have their beauty too.

Those who use these differences to make racist remarks are insecure losers and should be quite rightly censured, but we must be careful not to instil a fear of saying "this person is black/oriental/whatever", when it is just a neutral statement of fact.

PS I'm in London too :A

poet123

Quasar I agree, if I were in a room full of black people it would not offend me in the slightest to be described as the white person in the corner. It would be the most obvious attribute to use describe me. How can it be offensive to be factual, and being factual is very different to being deliberately offensive.

With regard to the turning white comment, my guess is that the comment was made in the way described above, in joke, as in white people go brown in the sun, maybe brown people turn white.

If the comments were made with racial intent that is entirely another matter, but the OP does not seem to suggest that is likely to be the case.

brownbabygirl

Quasar wrote: »

Actually I happen to be white - a chance of birth of course. Human skin is beautiful: its texture and smoothness truly shine when one is healthy. Its varying colours are to be celebrated, not seen as divisive. Black is beautiful. Brown is beautiful. White is beautiful too. Accents have their beauty too.

Those who use these differences to make racist remarks are insecure losers and should be quite rightly censured, but we must be careful not to instil a fear of saying "this person is black/oriental/whatever", when it is just a neutral statement of fact.

PS I'm in London too :A

:j Lol I actually assumed you were White when I wrote it. I meant the 'as well' in a totally different way ifswim

euronorris

burnsguitarman wrote: »

Personally I think you're making a mountain out of a mole hill, It sounds as if YOU have a problem with skin colour and are passing it on to your children by making a fuss, I'm sure your'e children will suffer much worse than this during their childhood! Don't take this the wrong way but it is just my opinion. All children have adverse comments made about them even if its because they have red hair, black skin, thin, fat, small, tall, or anything else! Granted the TA should have known that it may cause offence in these polictically correct days.

So...by this logic it is now OK for teaching staff to start calling children fat, gingers, ugly, too short etc??

I don't think so.

The fact that they will face far worse in the future is all the more reason for them to not have to put up with it from teachers!

I understand that children will always make comments to each other and be nasty. That's a fact of life, but the role of a parent AND teachers is to teach them that it is the differences in people that make them wonderful and special.

They should educate the children so that when they are adults, they don't continue such childish behaviour and learn to respect other people and see the beauty in the differences.

I'm sorry, the first comment is excusable as it was dealt with and she apologised. But, there is no excuse for a second time! Unless of course, there has been a misunderstanding, which is entirely possible.

Wait and see what the head has to say about it, but perhaps don't take things any higher at this point. It does seem more like ignorance at this point, rather than malicious intent, so some education from the headteacher or other teachers etc should resolve the issue pretty swiftly.

kjmtidea

I am rubbish at guessing ages but I would put her between 40 and 50. She is a qualified teaching assistant and also helps out in my other sons class in reception. To be honest it was the 'brown skin' part of the comment that worried me, it was like she was using that as an excuse for getting 2 mixed race children mixed up but she can remember 28 white childrens names? It didn't make any sense.

I don't believe that she is saying it in a nasty way I just think that she doesn't think before she opens her mouth. My main concern is that my childrens skin colour has never been an issue and I don't want it to become one, you might think that I am causing fuss over nothing but these are my children and I obviously I want to protect them.

Thank you to everyone though, it is interesting to see other points of view.