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Asked to babysit every Saturday

My stepdaughter has taken a job working in a nightlcub Thurs/Fri/Sat night, however, she has a daughter (6 years) no partner. She already has a job which fits in with school times and I told her she would be better doing that and not the nightclub. Anyway she doesn't listen to me, but I know that she is going to ask DH to babysit every Saturday, and I do not want to do it.

I work long hours all week, always worked full time even when I had my son, so I have done my bit.

This will cause a row in our house I'm sure, anyone else dealt with anything similar?
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Comments

  • Personally i think she's being very selfish expecting your OH to have her daughter every saturday. Is this job in the nightclub instead of her one through the day? I think you should put your foot down, its not fair on you after you've been at work all week. She needs to realise you have your own life as well x
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  • Odette
    Odette Posts: 716 Forumite
    Does she have money-worries and is trying to make things right? Just to play devils advocate, if shes trying to do right, you could maybe come to some arrangement?:confused:
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  • chipsdog
    chipsdog Posts: 450 Forumite
    Personally i think she's being very selfish expecting your OH to have her daughter every saturday. Is this job in the nightclub instead of her one through the day? I think you should put your foot down, its not fair on you after you've been at work all week. She needs to realise you have your own life as well x

    It was going to be both jobs, but, she is saying now that she won't have the day job for much longer as that are laying her off. You can't believe all she says, she has been a nightmare in the past, drugs etc

    I know I'm being selfish but, I just do not want to start it, but, OH is soft and will say yes.
  • minnie123
    minnie123 Posts: 2,133 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    It never cease to amaze me how much some people expect with regards to childcare etc.. I have a one year old and rarely have nights out because I feel cheeky asking people to babysit. I always wait until they offer.
  • tanith
    tanith Posts: 8,091 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    Well I guess if your OH is going to agree to do it then let HIM do the sitting... either make arrangements for a night out/visit friends or just do your own thing on Saturday nights, long pampering bubble bath, read a book just spend time on yourself and let him get on with babysitting... if he realises that HE is going to be doing the sitting he might not be so willing...
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  • Penny-Pincher!!
    Penny-Pincher!! Posts: 8,325 Forumite
    Does she live with you?


    Just say NO! If its in a night club, she will probably be expecting you to have the child all night too:confused:

    Her child....her repsonsibility!

    Sorry. I have never expected anyone to look after my DD (14) and can count on 1 hand how many times we have had an emergency.

    Maybe she can get and PAY a babysitter?

    PP
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  • chipsdog
    chipsdog Posts: 450 Forumite
    tanith wrote: »
    Well I guess if your OH is going to agree to do it then let HIM do the sitting... either make arrangements for a night out/visit friends or just do your own thing on Saturday nights, long pampering bubble bath, read a book just spend time on yourself and let him get on with babysitting... if he realises that HE is going to be doing the sitting he might not be so willing...

    Good idea - not sure how I'm going to say I'm not doing it
  • chipsdog
    chipsdog Posts: 450 Forumite
    Does she live with you?


    Just say NO! If its in a night club, she will probably be expecting you to have the child all night too:confused:

    Her child....her repsonsibility!

    Sorry. I have never expected anyone to look after my DD (14) and can count on 1 hand how many times we have had an emergency.

    Maybe she can get and PAY a babysitter?

    PP
    xx

    She doesn't live with us (thankfully) so it would be all night, DH would have to pick her and take her back the next day. I know she needs the money but, you can't work in a nightclub with a child and no partner - can you?
  • paulwellerfan
    paulwellerfan Posts: 1,190 Forumite
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    hey its a 6 year old -:confused:
    not a six week old getting up every other hour.
    cant you do it for say six months until she finds something more suitable ( for both sides)
    playing devils advocate here.:j
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  • boltonangel
    boltonangel Posts: 1,018 Forumite
    if your stepdaughter has money issues - which it sounds like she might as you've mentioned she'll be doing both jobs and may get laid off at the daytime job then it could be an idea to chat with her and work out what you are all comfortable with. if she's a single mum and struggling for money then surely that isn't a nice situation to be in.
    I understand your point of view, but at the end of the day if her dad has agreed to look after the child (which will be in bed at 7 or so) then that is his decision to help his daughter out.
    personally unless she has him babysitting a lot more i would let your husband know your concerns, but leave it at that. it's his daughter and his saturday night also.....he may want to spend time with his grandaughter.
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