in a difficult situation with our neighbours- what should we do?

olly300

Scabs wrote: »

Welcome to up north.

If you dont like friendly people I suggest London where nobody will talk to you and you will all be happy.

Be careful what part of London you live in as if they see you with children, live next to old people, mix with ethnic types and/or very recent immigrants your neighbours will bl**dy talk to you.

Strapped

lincroft1710 wrote: »

Apparently pampas grass in front garden is a "secret sign" that occupiers are swingers. May be an urban myth or someone else's in joke though.

OMG - I'm off to dig up the pampas grass immediately :eek:

xmaslolly76

I would love to have older neighbours the estate where i was brought up was very close knit and everyone knew everyone and we all pased the time of day and watched out for each other. Where i live now is full of young professionals/families who dont really give a damn about anyone else but themselves its quite lonely at times i dont think i really know any of my neighbours that well and its not for lack of trying they all have their own lives to lead but as others have said ten minutes out of your day is nothing to ask how others are. If i move again even with a young family of my own i will be looking for somewhere with more a mature background where people are bothered about each other. :-)

Lotus-eater

I'm friends with my neighbours and they are much older than me. It's called diversification, meeting people who aren't like you. You get their interests to learn about and you also get on very well with the people who live next door to you, which to me is one of the cleverest things you can do for yourself.
We don't go out with them, but we do pop round for coffee.

They don't have pampas grass though

My parents did in the 70's, it's got me thinking now...

skiTTish

xmaslolly76 wrote: »

I would love to have older neighbours the estate where i was brought up was very close knit and everyone knew everyone and we all pased the time of day and watched out for each other.

Im hopefully buying my childhood home and have been welcomed back by all my 'aunts and uncles ' ( all the nieghbours )
Its a lil fab cul-de-sac,it must be as I am the third of the second generation to move back and cant wait to be part of the family again ( sad innit :rotfl: )

SUESMITH_2

why can't you tell more, are you in witness protection or something?

we had an old lady like yours on one side of us but as the years past we became good friends - she would take parcels in for us, look out for the kids and help when we went on holiday, my husband would elp her by cutting the hedge, going round if she was worried about anything and sorting out her boiler.

she died a year or so ago and were were devastated because in our own quiet way we had become very close - we moved into the house when we were young and child free, we are now well into middle age and our kids are now almost grown up and i have developed wisdom about things like this

no we were not similar people, we had no real shared interests but every time i have to drive and pick my parcels up or find someone to mind the house i miss her

on the other side we have a lovely man and his kids, we chat and are friendly but again dont socialise, i class us very lucky to have good neighbours

oh and she left the house to her grandson and his girlfriend who has moved in and are also lovely people

pimento

lincroft1710 wrote: »

Apparently pampas grass in front garden is a "secret sign" that occupiers are swingers. May be an urban myth or someone else's in joke though.

I never knew that!

Strange though because when we moved in in 2001, we had pampas grass in our front garden and there was some very interesting mail delivered for the previous owner!

We still have the pampas. No wonder our neighbours give us funny looks.

queenieplum

I dont think its acceptable for a neighbour just to walk in unannounced. I think really they are just tring to be welcoming...and good nieghbours watch out for your property when you are not there - its better to be friends than foe's with your neighbours.

Castleman

overdraftoverdrive wrote: »

They arent offensive or nasty or anything, they are just not our kind of person and my husband dislikes her. That is incredibly nice of your husband if there appears to be no reason not to like them. Or even to dislike them.

there are other big issues with my neighbour that i won't recount here,

Ah, yes, the classic get-out clause! Just in case everyone starts to turn on you.

Welcome to the real world - there are lots of people, of all kinds and not all are how you'd have them be (thank goodness). Ever tried living in a different part of the world with a completely different culture? It might be beneficial to you and your husband long term and help you in your understanding of other people.

Friendly neighbours are a good thing and just because someone is friendly or very friendly doesn't mean they want to be your best friend. It means that they want to be friendly.