A new start for Mooloo

Keeping_Motivated

I can understand how you feel about her, it sounds completly justified HOWEVER you have so many battles to fight at the moment and 'choose your battles carefully' springs to mind here!

I'm not suggesting you pay up out of your pocket or anything but just be careful what you take on and also MAKE SURE that DS is along side you every step of whatever you have to do for this situation as it was his choices/decisions that are partly to blame for where he finds himself with this situation so please do not do any of the appointments etc alone. Make him be part of resolving it and if possible let him do at least 75% of the resolving or he also will never learn and will also rely on you in the future.

Savvy_sewing

Keeping_Motivated wrote: »

I can understand how you feel about her, it sounds completly justified HOWEVER you have so many battles to fight at the moment and 'choose your battles carefully' springs to mind here!

I'm not suggesting you pay up out of your pocket or anything but just be careful what you take on and also MAKE SURE that DS is along side you every step of whatever you have to do for this situation as it was his choices/decisions that are partly to blame for where he finds himself with this situation so please do not do any of the appointments etc alone. Make him be part of resolving it and if possible let him do at least 75% of the resolving or he also will never learn and will also rely on you in the future.

You are right. I will let him take responsibility of it. But will hold his hand where and if necessary.
I do not want to see the dam woman as I really dont like scenes and I fear there would be.
I have told DS that he may have to write his stuff off to experience. But of course we do not know what she is planning to do now. That why I was going to write a letter suggesting that we would need to take legal advise as she wouldnt accept DS/s offer of installments, and wouldnt let him have his things.
DS doesnt want to walk away from his Debt, but he didnt really understand what she was asking him to do, and she filled in the forms. He just signed it.

Tonight, I cannot do anything anyway. I will try to push it all to the back of my mind for now.
I think I will "waste" the electric a bit and put the hot water back on after DGD's bath, and have a soak in the tub with some bubbles myself, then bury myself in a book or something.

Keeping_Motivated

Mooloo I have just seen this site, it might be worth a read...

http://www.grandparentsasparents.org.uk/

Savvy_sewing

Keeping_Motivated wrote: »

Mooloo I have just seen this site, it might be worth a read...

http://www.grandparentsasparents.org.uk/

Just going to have my tea, put DGD to bed, then I will have a read. Thanks :A

Eager_Elephant

Mooloo wrote: »

Thanks EE.
sorry I am really down today, I should remember that i am not the only one with problems. Everyone has them.
.

Mooloo

Please do not apologise for something which is not your fault. Of course everyone has problems and yes some are bigger than others but it is how you cope with the problems which really matter.

To be honest Mooloo you have had your fair share of problems these past few years and none of it has been your fault, you are just trying to juggle everything for everyone.

You are a kind hearted woman - maybe you are too kind but that is not a fault it is just who you are - and maybe your children have been taking advantage a bit.

Hope you manage to enjoy a good soak in the bath.

EE

daska

Mooloo wrote: »

DS's friends mother is definitely charging a strange amount of rent.

It's the 'odd' pence that gets me. Is it worth checking the LHA rates for the area he was living in, it may be that she's deliberately chosen that amount to get the maximum payable.

Savvy_sewing

daska wrote: »

It's the 'odd' pence that gets me. Is it worth checking the LHA rates for the area he was living in, it may be that she's deliberately chosen that amount to get the maximum payable.

I think you are right there.

Savvy_sewing

DGD is shouting at me, and not settling down as I had hoped she would. She has been a little devil all day. Doesnt help when I am not feeling very brilliant. Kids can tell can't they! She is demanding more milk, but I am not giving her anymore, one because we hardly have any left, and two becuase she is wetting through the nappies etc as mentioned before, and I havent had the energy to make nappy linings etc etc as of yet.
Lets hope she gives in soon.
I really want her to settle so I can think about having a bath. As the bathroom is downstairs and at the other side of the stone walls of the cottage,in a leantoo built on the original cottage, I cannot hear anything from her room down there.
But if she doesnt go to sleep soon, I may be too tired to have my longed for bath, and may have to go straight to bed myself.!

Savvy_sewing

Finally all quiet upstairs.
Just watching country file, and then I shall run my bath. (if I dont fall asleep first).

Lets hope that tomorrow is a better day all around.

Errata

daska wrote: »

It's the 'odd' pence that gets me. Is it worth checking the LHA rates for the area he was living in, it may be that she's deliberately chosen that amount to get the maximum payable.

It seems quite bizarre. Whatever the LHA rate is, it's for a room - not half a room or a share of a room. That's the whole point of Housing Benefit.