A new start for Mooloo

SDG31000

Sorry to hijack Mooloo's thread, but I just wanted to send my best wishes to your cousin shaz_mum_of_2. My Brother was born nearly 3 months early, weighing just 2lb 5 oz. He was the youngest and smallest baby that the hospital had looked after at the time. He is now 32 with no health worries and running his own business. Just think about how much medicine has progressed in the last 32 years. I will be thinking of you all and hoping for the best possible outcome. Take care xxx

shaz_mum_of__2

Thanks SDG3100 i know medicine has come a long way and she lives abroad in a country the standard of care is way better than anything we get here(ivf on the state health service and paid for the flights to get there and accommadated them !!) i am sure everything will be ok but you never really know do you ......thanks for the kind words though


mooloo when i finish my degree i would love to work in a mums unit or set one up


Slightly off topic but has anyone watched the series The specials on Y0utube ? great docudrama about a group of teens with learning difficulties living in a shared house , they have won some kind of award and off to new york its heartwarming stuff that portrays kids with special needs as human in a positive way ...great watch

gizmo111

Mooloo wrote: »

Well the meeting lasted an hour and a half.
I seemed to be the main person talking, with the chairperson.
The faults in the system have come to light.
She has called for another meeting in 8 weeks, and told the social services that they must come up with a Complete Care Plan.
That the kinship assessments must be done. Should have been done as we all know.
They also want the Family agreement more refined.
The health visitor was against me leaving DGD with her Mum unsupervised, but the social workers had said that they were happy for her to have her for a few hours. But we now have to define what a few hours are.
The social worker handed over today to a new team. The team that are dealing withmy grandsons.
The boys were moved away to the north of the county today. I am very upset about that as the access is denied to us, for at least a week now.

We have still called for the assessment for mum. But it is looking like the health visitor really has it in for the twins.
I am starting another long road of battles I can see.
So we have 8 weeks where we wait for the SS to come up with their next plan of action.

Twin1 just played with DGD and didnt really listen to the meeting. Let it all go over her head.

I have "kidnapped" DS from twin2's house, and brought him back home to help me with the lawn, and he has done that.
He is currently cooking me some eggs to go with the gammon and chips I had started. (I will not complain).
I am really tired, and very sore. Must have hit my wall.
Aches and pains have really kicked in.
I can see a very early night, if I dont get a second wind!.
I wanted to do so much today.
I did manage to label a few plastic pockets and get them into a lever arch file. And put a pile of documents into them as I went along but its just the tip of the iceberg really. starting a new system will really need a proper way to think so that this time it works for me. So Shaz I will be trying to follow your advise.
I think I will have to get you to help me re organise other things! My home has become a dumping ground at the moment. Even the table that i put in the kitchen to be able to have some work space is now full of things. Even the babies steriliser etc etc.!
So I shall need diligence and patience to get through it all. Before I was struck down with my spondylosis I would blitz regularly, but no more.

Right time to go.

Hi mooloo

as usual I am confused when you have meetings about the children.
Which child was th meeting about?
What is the legal staus of the children?
Who are they asking for the care plan?
Loads more q's when you tell me the above

G
x

Savvy_sewing

Hello, the meeting that I went to was supposed to be about how the fostering of DGD was getting on.
She is still legally under her mother as far as I can say. All we are doing and have done is totally voluntary.
The care Plan is for DGD. As there actually has never been one.
The chair woman gave SS 8 weeks to come up with plan for the next meeting.
She is not sure that the assessment that SS are working on, was actually the right assessment to be making the judgements that they did.
Basically it looks like we will be starting from square one, and meanwhile I have DGD until we work it all out. (or not).

Savvy_sewing

shaz_mum_of__2 wrote: »

Mooloo i think you can ask for a change of health visitors as their have been many changes lately (here at least) i will check with hubby later (school nurse) seems it helps noone if she has a prejudicial attitude and she is the eyes and ears of the panel so uou need to be sure she is honest about things .

Good day here for me catching up with family but my poor cousin has gone into prem labour , she had IVF and is expecting twins , she is only 28wks and the babys only weigh an estimated 2LB each , i hope they can stop the labour her side of the family have had so many losses lately(3 bereavements in as many weeks) i think this may tip them over the edge

Shaz,its probably a bit late in my asking, but Ihope that things with your cousin have improved.
I noticed while reading just now some incouraging talk, but I would like to tell you that I was a premature baby, and i weighedin at 2lb odd,about the size of a bag of sugar my mum said,and 13 weeks early, and I am 49 inJuly!.
I wish your cousin and her family well.

Savvy_sewing

crutches wrote: »

(((((((((9hugs))))) WELL DONE! Glad they have been given a structure and a timeframe.

If anyone has diligence and patience it is you.:)

Crutches,
I am sorry, but I really am not so much of a person.
I am confused, stressed and running around in ever decreasing circles.
I so want to be organised, and I want to be practical, and thurough? but I fear that I run from one disaster to the next.
I am listening to Michael Bouble on the tv. what a sexy, gorgeous man. If only I was about 20 years younger I would have fantasies?! Ah well I am not but my daughter is here and she is.!

Ok, I have been away for the weekend, I wasnt supposed to go, but when I went to see the nurse, my blood pressure was sky high. My heart was thumping in my mouth, cos I realised that something has got to give and at the moment its me. So it upset me so much. I ran to the "hills" well to BF.

We spoke today, well mostly I spoke, and i cryed.
I feel I am loosing the fight, at least for twin2. She didnt come back yesterday, she has shunned me on the phone, and seems to be still blaming me for her loosing the boys. I think that I can only focus now on DGD and her Mum, and see if I can at least go as far as we can on her case.
I have no fight left for twin2. She has cut me to the core.

jackieglasgow

Oh Mooloo, have a hug and some love from me. You cannot blame yourself, you have tried as hard as you can with your daughter, and cannot make her feel maternal. If her mental age is that of a young teenager, then there is no way she can feel responsible in the way that she should. Maybe she just needs some space and will come back renewed and refreshed, ready to be taught to be a mother. If not, then the decision will need to be taken to give those boys as good a life as possible, be that lond term fostering or adoption. (I think you do need to keep your mind open about this possibility). I hope you manage to sleep tonight. Thinking of you, as always. X

SuziQ

Mooloo you can ask for a change of Health Visitor. In fact, there is no law that says that anyone has to have a Health Visitor- we have no right of entry like Social workers who can get a court order and police escort and the only visit that is covered by law is the New birth visit after a child's birth. It would be a pity to carry on with such a negative influence- I always tried to be a very positive input in a family, no matter what the circumstances were and if only you could have a HV with the same attituce it would be a real bonus to you. I had svereal families changed onto my caseload as I worked with a right old batle axe for a couple of years who just could not work with young mums-she was so bossy and condescending they would just slam the door in her face, but having met me at clinic they agreed to have me instead. I don't think there was anything special about me-I knew lots of HV's like me who had a real interest in supporting young mums and there must be the like in your area, too.

jackieglasgow

SuziQ just have to say I love your sig, Maya Angelou is my favourite writer.

marybelle

Mooloo, I have read all of this thread (and what a read - burned the midnight oil!) and have caught up with it. Having worked in a social work department, I can't understand why you have had all this hassle - and my heart goes out to you and your family. It seems like you have been very badly let down by management - THEY are accountable, the basic social workers usually have horrendous workloads, but somebody MUST take responsibility. I can only repeat what others have said that you really need to contact your MP and anyone else you thnk will help. You deserve it, as do your girls and the children.

Sending you my very best wishes, xxxxxx