In bed with my creditor ...

leekat21

Hi Raini

I'd just like to say that i've been in the same situ that you're in. I owned up to my other half about debt that I had just after I moved in with him. He paid it all off for me (from his savings) and it was around £9k, and I then paid him back each month.

It took me 2 years but he's had every penny back from me and it helped me to realise that I had to be sensible with money. He got any money that I had left over at the end of the month. I was very mean with myself and bought no clothes/shoes, didn't go on work social things and I only bought essentials.

It revolutionised the way I shop.

I can understand people thinking that it's not a good basis to see yourself as owing your partner, but I have a friend whose boyf paid off her debts and although she started to pay him back she then stopped and now he uses it as something to throw into every little disagreement that they have. Although my other half isn't of that nature, I didn't want it to be something that he could use against me.

He admitted when I had finished paying him back that he never expected to get it all back in such a short space of time. In fact, he said he would have been happy to get 50% back from me and call it quits, but the way I see it is, no other creditor would have been happy with 50% so why should he have been. Also I guess I know, all he got back will be ploughed into our house renovations so we both benefit.

So, don't lose heart, it's hard but you'll do it and the feeling of achievement will be fab.

Raini

mrscmr wrote: »

evening raini
wow your list is so impressive. i like lists too but somehow dont always get round to writing them down - just sometimes do them in my head and get scared!

have a great week and try to list on ebay - i know its hard but just a couple of things a day will help.
x

Thanks Mrscmr! I really appreciate your support and I've been very very good & listed 20 items on ebay!! :T Well done me! It's still not quite what I wanted to achieve but better than nothing. I actually have 27 items on there at the moment, which I'm quite pleased about.

Raini

leekat21 wrote: »

Hi Raini

I'd just like to say that i've been in the same situ that you're in. I owned up to my other half about debt that I had just after I moved in with him. He paid it all off for me (from his savings) and it was around £9k, and I then paid him back each month.

It took me 2 years but he's had every penny back from me and it helped me to realise that I had to be sensible with money. He got any money that I had left over at the end of the month. I was very mean with myself and bought no clothes/shoes, didn't go on work social things and I only bought essentials.

It revolutionised the way I shop.

I can understand people thinking that it's not a good basis to see yourself as owing your partner, but I have a friend whose boyf paid off her debts and although she started to pay him back she then stopped and now he uses it as something to throw into every little disagreement that they have. Although my other half isn't of that nature, I didn't want it to be something that he could use against me.

He admitted when I had finished paying him back that he never expected to get it all back in such a short space of time. In fact, he said he would have been happy to get 50% back from me and call it quits, but the way I see it is, no other creditor would have been happy with 50% so why should he have been. Also I guess I know, all he got back will be ploughed into our house renovations so we both benefit.

So, don't lose heart, it's hard but you'll do it and the feeling of achievement will be fab.

Hi LA21, thank you so much for the message you've no idea how much that helped!! Started to think maybe everyone thought I was being an idiot!! The LB did such a sweet thing & I owe him the money & I don't care if no-one else sees it that way. I don't think the LB would ever throw it back in my face if I didn't give it him back but I don't ever want him to think "I could have done this with that money ..." or for him to think I don't appreciate how much money he gave to me. Or for him to feel taken for granted.
I think that I've completely changed my shopping habits too. To the point where my Pa offered to buy me a dress & I said thanks very much but no because I wouldn't pay £30 for a dress!! Shocking! :eek: But good!! :T Because I so want to give the LB his money back I find it really hard to spend anything. I'm constantly torn between waiting to show the LB how much money I've saved for him & wanting it to be a bit of a surprise when I give him his money back sooner than he expects ...

Rambling ... rambling ... very very tired ... off to Bedfordshire ...

(Thanks again!) x

SazM030306

Hi Raini, you're doing fab so far! I think you're dead right to want to pay LB back, why shouldn't you?!
I'll be following your diary as I dig my own way out of debt :-)
Sarah
xxx

Raini

Hi Sarah, Thank you for the support. Appreciate it Going to see if you have a diary too!! Thanx again :D x

Raini

Got to work on time this morning which is a positive start!! Went down to the wards (I work in a hospital) to try to book in some Bank shifts & got annoyed when the smelly Team Leader made it perfectly clear that I wasn't going to get all the shifts I wanted!! :mad: We have history!!!! I do understand that I can't have ALL the shifts on offer but I did my time as a Bank member of staff & worked my way up & as I can ONLY do extra shifts at the weekend & as I was in there FIRST I just wanted to tell him to bog off!! But obviously I can't as I need to keep him sweet so I can scrape some shifts together!! Just so frustrating :mad: You have a plan to sort your life out & then have to be dependant on other people to not hold a grudge because you don't want to flirt with them anymore!!!! Anyway have tried the other wards but bascially will just have to say yes to everything I can for the next year & my life will have to come second. :sad: Even if I book shifts in I can be cancelled at the very last minute so I can't rely on anything!
Anyhoo, I also wanted to say that I'm so exhusted that I'm thinking I need to do something ... I was thinking maybe if I exercised I'd be fitter & not so tired all the time???? Not that I particularly have the time or motivation to do that of course, but I'm thinking it would help? Also, I've been gradually putting weight on for a while & feel bigger than I'm happy with. (Just in case anyone has read this thread though, I've not been a size 8 for quite a while!!)

Must go back to work ... Not sure whether to do a To Do List for this week or not as I won't really be able to anything! Maybe later ... must work ... must stop typing on here ... *I wish I wish I wish* I was rich ... or maybe just enough to not have to work all the time ... going now ...

Raini

Raini

Well I have been bad but lucky today!! I had to go to a meeting today to network & by the time I got back to the office my colleague & I were so tired & it was so hot that we decided to home! She is slightly more senior to me so as far as I'm concerned my boss said I could go home!! :j But then decided to pop into Mr T's & bought a magazine, an anniversary card for LB for Monday, 1 dress, 2 skirts, 1 top & 2 flip flops for £45!! :eek: But got home & had a change of heart & took back the dress & one of the skirts. Then I realised that I hadn't been charged for the other skirt!! Whoop whoop! :T So £30 was refunded into my account & I got a free skirt yay!
Have some interest in my ebay items. Someone emailed me yesterday asking if I would take twice the amount listed for the item but end it now. I was tempted but thought better not. But today I got an email from someone else asking if I would take 5x the amount!! Am sorely tempted!
Also, bought some more food bits today so will update my totals tomorrow - I'm so tired!
Oh, also got 7 out of the 15 shifts available in July which is a lot better than expected!!
Here's tomorrow ... :money:

mrscmr

ooo ooo raini you have a ticker... where did u get that?

Raini

Hello Mrscmr, It's from tickerfactory.com and there are loads of different types to choose from much fun!!