Support for people with Depression

Horasio

Sazbo wrote: »

Morning everyone :hello:

I'm with you re the weather Beth - it makes everything a bit harder, I think. When I get up in the morning it still feels like the middle of the night. And then I don't feel like I ever really wake up fully, it's just varying degrees of partial awakeness!:o

I've had better and worse phases of pmt over the years. I've tried so many things and I was never quite sure what's worked and what hasn't. But for me I did feel that adopting a low carb diet eased my symptoms - something to do helping keep hormones in balance.

Katie enjoy your day in Exeter.

Hugs to everyone :wave:

Much love,
Sazzy xxxxxxxx

Interesting you saying low carbs work. The NAPS recommendation is to eat carbs every 3 hours. All it did for me was put weight on for me and didn't do much else.

pipkin71

CCStar wrote: »

Beachbeth, you have triggered a lot for me in discussing PMT

PMT/PMDD/Troublesome periods - irregular and draining

All things I am very familiar with

Ever since I started puberty, I became depressed and introverted. I felt like a freak as I was so young and got teased at school about it. I didn't get teased after age 14 as most girls would have had them at that age. I was irregular every single month till I took the pill.

It is very interesting.

DD has awful periods and although she has a few moods with them, they aren't so severe. DD2 has quite an emotional time but not so far as depression is concerned, however your post was interesting to read.

Since DD2 started, I have been giving her Kalms, so that she isn't as tense. I can see a correlation between periods and her mood, so have to hope that it doesn't magnify into something worse, as depression is such a horrible thing to live with

Thank you for your post CCStar. It has certainly made interesting reading

pipkin71

CCStar wrote: »

Interesting you saying low carbs work. The NAPS recommendation is to eat carbs every 3 hours. All it did for me was put weight on for me and didn't do much else.

Due to lack of mobility, my weight has crept up, and it was also suggested to me that I eat less carbs.

Sazbo

Yes, a very interesting discussion:) CC - I think the carbs every 3 hours idea involves dividing you carb portions in two. So for example if you were having toast or cereal fror breakfast, have half of one portion at 8am, say and the other half at 11am. Similarly have half of lunch sandwich at 12 and the other half at 3. I think that was how it was described to me, altho it was a while ago. If you are dividing portions then that should help avoid putting weight on.

I think the theory is that by avoiding large spikes and troughs in your insulin and blood sugar levels (which is caused by eating a large quantity of carbs at one meal), it causes less interference with the uptake of progesterone and therefore reduces pmt symptons. As say, that's the theory.

But pipkin I do feel healthier all round by reducing carbs. As I say, eating a lot of carbs triggers the release of insulin and this in turn triggers hunger. Keeping insulin and blood sugar more level helps keep hunger at bay. And apart from anything else, carbs are so calories dense. Not saying I'm perfect either - I still get carb cravings as bad as the next person lol but I try to keep it under control!

Sazzy xxx

Sazbo

CCStar wrote: »

So I ask does where you live and who you live with influence depression?

CC hun - I have a very dear, close relative who has never been happy where ever she has lived. This is someone who has lived all over the world, and is now in her 70s. She always thought the next place would be the answer to all her problems. But it never was.

Whenever I looked at her situation, it made me feel that the answer for me was to strive to be happy with myself as much as I could, because nowhere and no-one is perfect - everywhere and everyone has their plus and minus points. Yes, I still suffer from depression, but for me - and I am just talking for me - the best path seemed to be to try and generate happiness from the inside first and gradually widen it out from there. Then there is like an envelope of contentment for me to inhabit, where ever I happen to be and whoever happens to be around me. See what I mean? For me - even if I could make everything and everyone around me as I wanted, it would be illusory and shortlived and even if it wasn't, wouldn't alter the unhappiness at my core.

lol well that's just my assorted ramblings on the subject. Sorry if they make no sense!:o

saz x

beachbeth

I understood it that you had to eat regular starchy meals (is this the same as carbs? Im not sure) As you say, Sazbo, you cut your carbs in half and have 6 small meals a day rather than 3 normal sized ones. I always found that doing this stopped me being irritable and angry and really helped. A few months ago I was trying the Slimming World diet and did the red, original day which involves eating meat but not much carbohydrate. It made me very irritable even though it wasn't that time of the month! So I know I wouldn't be able to cope with the Atkins or anything like that. I need carbs!

I read something interesting that you need to eat fibre because then oestrogen attaches itself to the fibre and is taken out of the body. If you don't do this the oestrogen travels back round the body and causes pms symptoms.

beachbeth

CCStar wrote: »

I had counselling and had good and bad ones. The good ones helped me immensely, the bad ones obviously useless and some made it worse. The 'tough love' method NEVER works with me and I tend to either withdraw/feel sorry for myself or take my anger out on some other poor soul.

Tough love doesn't work for me either. It just makes me feel like a failure and useless.

CCStar wrote:

The best counsellors are the ones who understand and reassure you you are OK really and suggest useful things but the main benefit is the feeling of being understood.

Cognitive therapy seems very male to me. I can see what they are saying but it doesn't address the emotional aspect of why you feel scared or anxious. They are trying to cure with logic but we can say all those things to ourselves but it doesn't always help. It has an element of 'don't be so silly' about it. I'm not knocking it and it has helped others but it didn't do much for me.

You are so right and have put it into words better than I ever have! I feel much more able to talk to someone if they have empathy. They don't have to have suffered with depression themselves but it helps if they understand where Im coming from with my thoughts. Cognitive therapy does seem male orientated (is that the correct word???). Someone telling you "Don't think like that, think like this!" - I just can't see that working for me! A bit like saying to someone who is scared of rabbits "don't see them as a rabbit, see them as a hairy tortoise". I can't imagine being able to do it!

CCStar wrote:

A very strange change of subject. Does anyone find supermarkets in the south very different to ones up north? In Scotland, you did your shopping and that was it, you would sometimes chat but it wasn't obligatory. Down here they seem to want a conversation and get offended if you feel tired or not up to it.

I don't think its a north/south thing. I live in the midlands and in my particular village people keep themselves to themselves but at the same time will say hello if you pass by, even though they don't know you. Yet in some nearby towns people can barely bring themselves to grunt if you were to ask them something! I just think its different town to town. Funny though, I always find when Im feeling tearful and happen to nip into a shop to get something that this is when someone will try to strike up a conversation! When Im feeling up to talking to people it doesn't happen so much! How contrary!:p

pipkin71

beachbeth wrote: »

I understood it that you had to eat regular starchy meals (is this the same as carbs? Im not sure) As you say, Sazbo, you cut your carbs in half and have 6 small meals a day rather than 3 normal sized ones. I always found that doing this stopped me being irritable and angry and really helped. A few months ago I was trying the Slimming World diet and did the red, original day which involves eating meat but not much carbohydrate. It made me very irritable even though it wasn't that time of the month! So I know I wouldn't be able to cope with the Atkins or anything like that. I need carbs!

That's interesting about cutting down the carbs so you don't eat much.

Also interesting that food can also affect your mood.

I like the idea of 6 smaller meals and may give that a try, it's just getting the timing right. I know the extra weight I've put on in this last year, isn't helping.

willa

I always find that when people say 'oh stop being negative', when I'm upset or whatever, that it entrenches me even more in negativity. I fight my corner to try to make them understand, whereas if they were a bit more sympathetic I'd prob feel a bit better and shut up!
My hubby is good like this but in past relationships I used to come up against a lot of the above.
On the complex carbs and PMT thing, a very healthwise clued up friend once suggested to me to cook some brown rice, cover and keep in fridge and eat a mouthful often.
Too virtuous for me I'm afraid! My diet is a mix of extremely healthy and a bit crappy.
I do need to eat regularly though with PMT or I can get very shaky and liable to 'kick off' (not physically) if upset.

pipkin71

willa wrote: »

I always find that when people say 'oh stop being negative', when I'm upset or whatever, that it entrenches me even more in negativity. I fight my corner to try to make them understand, whereas if they were a bit more sympathetic I'd prob feel a bit better and shut up!
My hubby is good like this but in past relationships I used to come up against a lot of the above.
On the complex carbs and PMT thing, a very healthwise clued up friend once suggested to me to cook some brown rice, cover and keep in fridge and eat a mouthful often.
Too virtuous for me I'm afraid! My diet is a mix of extremely healthy and a bit crappy.
I do need to eat regularly though with PMT or I can get very shaky and liable to 'kick off' (not physically) if upset.

I can see that someone telling you to pull yourself together, would make you do the opposite. It's like someone telling you to just eat less and you wouldn't weigh so much - easier said than done

It's also difficult when you're in a relationship and the person doesn't understand. Sometimes though, they can be in a position of not knowing what to say for the best, and anything they say can make a person feel bad. This I have experienced, and I think it's so sad, because when someone is depressed, they don't actually realise how much their loved ones are hurting, because of their depression.

It's good that you have someone who is supportive, as I do think that makes a difference

My diet isn't great at the moment, so it's something I need to look at.