MSE Pregnancy Club VII

Mrs_Moc

I could never cope with weekend visitors never mind 5/6 weeks!! A couple of hours is stressful and I feel completely uncomfortable the entire time.

At least If I do the visiting, I can call it a day and go home to do my own thing when I want.

They are both great with helping out though and take the oldest two overnight quite often. My son who is 1y wont leave my side unless its to go to bed.

MIL can be too helpful at times though, she insisted on collecting DD from school after DS was born, which was great, but after much convincing I was capable of doing it myself she finally let me start collecting her LAST WEEK!!

I have been trying to tell her in a nice way, I want to collect my own daughter from school, do her homework with her, and she kept on arriving at the school anyway. She finally got the message last week, after a whole year. Watching my DD run from her class shouting mummy and waving had tears streaming down my face. I had really missed that!!

weezl74

cazscoob wrote: »

oh weezl what a handsome little man you have! glad you had your HB, afterwards when they had all went away and it was just the 3 of you did you get a totally relaxed feeling? i felt so calm and relaxed it was strange!

Hi caz, thanks;) and glad it helped your serenity. How you doin now, getting any rest?

Yeah the first few hours were fab! I was so glad for DH that he didn't have to leave us, dad's get a rough deal with hospitals sometimes I reckon. I hope that lots of you get those rooms where there's a bed for oh and no horrid restricting hours.

unless of course you'd like a break!

helen81_2

See, I don't feel I can make him stay in a hotel, the house we live in used to be his and my mums house. They bought a place abroad,the house in UK ended up being stood empty for months at a time, we (me,hubby and kids) needed a bigger house so we bought it off them at a reduced price and said that they could have the attic bedroom when they were in the UK visiting, they only ever stayed over in England for 2 weeks at a time so we thought the advantages of having the bigger house outweighed the thought of living with my parents 2weeks at a time.
Mum died in October. Dad must be lonely I understand that, but I cannot cope with him living under same roof as us..and for such a long time..its a day short of 6weeks this visit and Im going spare. I'll be lucky not to lose this baby the way Im constantly feeling.

helen81_2

Karen, Im not managing. not managing atall but I don't know what to do. What can I do! Nothing!

redmel1621

That's nice Nicki, sounds like your mil is really helpful. Hopefully she can help again this time round:)

My mil didn't even used to pop in to see us or the kids, and for nearly 5yrs she walked past the end of our cul-de-sac almost daily. In all that time she came to our house twice, and never even bothered to get the kids Christmas or birthday presents!!

My mum was slightly more helpful, but unfortunately my dad wouldn't let her do much for us, and would always kick up a big stink if she even left the house for more than an hour at a time, if it was to see us!!

feelie - I know what you mean about waiting for stuff for baby. No-one ever offered us any freebies, and this time my sister came round with 3 bin bags of clothes, all of which were !!!! and she obviously just wanted someone to palm them of onto.....

Mel x

Mrs_Moc

helen81 wrote: »

Karen, Im not managing. not managing atall but I don't know what to do. What can I do! Nothing!

I can only imagine how your feeling, sounds like my worst nightmare!!

Is the situation likely to change, if not I would seriously consider telling him how you feel and seeing if you can come to a different arrangement.

redmel1621

helen81 wrote: »

See, I don't feel I can make him stay in a hotel, the house we live in used to be his and my mums house. They bought a place abroad,the house in UK ended up being stood empty for months at a time, we (me,hubby and kids) needed a bigger house so we bought it off them at a reduced price and said that they could have the attic bedroom when they were in the UK visiting, they only ever stayed over in England for 2 weeks at a time so we thought the advantages of having the bigger house outweighed the thought of living with my parents 2weeks at a time.
Mum died in October. Dad must be lonely I understand that, but I cannot cope with him living under same roof as us..and for such a long time..its a day short of 6weeks this visit and Im going spare. I'll be lucky not to lose this baby the way Im constantly feeling.

Has he still got his house abroad? Does he have any other family/friends that he could stay with? It is a terrible position to be in, the last thing you want to do is turn out a parent BUT if it is having such a bad effect on you, I think you might need to do something.

Mel x

karen1907

helen81 wrote: »

See, I don't feel I can make him stay in a hotel, the house we live in used to be his and my mums house. They bought a place abroad,the house in UK ended up being stood empty for months at a time, we (me,hubby and kids) needed a bigger house so we bought it off them at a reduced price and said that they could have the attic bedroom when they were in the UK visiting, they only ever stayed over in England for 2 weeks at a time so we thought the advantages of having the bigger house outweighed the thought of living with my parents 2weeks at a time.
Mum died in October. Dad must be lonely I understand that, but I cannot cope with him living under same roof as us..and for such a long time..its a day short of 6weeks this visit and Im going spare. I'll be lucky not to lose this baby the way Im constantly feeling.

Have you thought about sitting down and talking with him about it. I know this is a lot easier said than done, but at least try and come to some compromise, like you said you are worried about the baby he should understand that. Maybe you could suggest he help out more or (if it would work for you) ask him to use it as bed and breakfast so he would go out for the majority of the day that way you would have the house to yourself for most of the day and the only meal you would worry about is breakfast which can be sorted pretty easy.

Sorry if I have misunderstood this but your number one priority should be you and your baby at the moment. You have to look after yourself (and your other children).

emlou2009

omfg i'm so fed up right now! had to rush down the hospital this morning cos after the sweep i had on weds the bleeding and cramping didnt stop for 24 hours, then last night it all started again with a vengeance but instead of brown bloody show type blood it was bright red, i panicked and rang the hospital who said it was normal and take some paracetamol and go to bed! when i got up a million times through the night nothing had changed, still bleeding, so waited til OH was getting up for work and rang them again and they said i should go straight in with all my bags as they would probably have to keep me in and that if i was having any kind of bright red bleeding then i should have gone in straight away which obviously put the fear of god into me!

got to the hospital and was ushered into a waiting room, we counted 7 women came in one after the other laughing and joking without a care in the world and were all seen before me! 2 hours after we got there we got called through and the woman basically said everything i was experiencing was completely normal and tried to send me away without checking me over at all!! i refused to go anywhere so she grudgingly put me on a heartbeat monitor and went off and left me for ages then came back and pretty much said "i told you so" and sent me home! dont get me wrong i'm so pleased and relieved everything is fine but i'm so angry at being made to feel like i'm a criminal wasting precious nhs time, its hardly my fault i spoke to someone who thought what i was experiencing needed to be checked! am i wrong to think if i'm having bleeding someone should at very least do an internal??

:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

rant over! huge labour vibes to MFD, hope its all going down over there for you now, that baby really just doesnt want to come out!

cazscoob

weezl74 wrote: »

Hi caz, thanks;) and glad it helped your serenity. How you doin now, getting any rest?

Yeah the first few hours were fab! I was so glad for DH that he didn't have to leave us, dad's get a rough deal with hospitals sometimes I reckon. I hope that lots of you get those rooms where there's a bed for oh and no horrid restricting hours.

unless of course you'd like a break!

we are all doing great minus the thrush and sick lol! luckily we seem to have a good little routine going and she has slotted in fine with the waythings are done! am getting a good few hours during the day and night she is going from 10-4 and 4.30-8 so cannot complain at all!!! how about you? are you getting much sleep/rest? she is very nosey and likes to watch!!!