MSE Pregnancy Club VII

karen1907

helen81 wrote: »

Karen- Im curious to know why your visiting parents wouldn't stay with you at your house? Is it because you just couldn't cope with living under same roof as them or a space issue? Don't answer if you think Im being too nosey,but I do have reason

I don't think you are being nosey.

A couple of reasons:
1. I was thinking that Steve (my OH) and I would want time just me and the baby when he was around without the MILs getting in the way
2. Would they really want to stay in the house with a new baby
3. We only have two bedrooms so only one set of parents could stay and I wouldn't want to tell one set they couldn't stay.

helen81_2

Sami_Bee wrote: »

I'm watching it on +1 missed the beginning tho!
OH rang me at about 8pm to say plasterer could come tomorrow to do ceiling so could I get my dad to help move all the "totally essential boxes and bags of stuff" that filled the space under the kitchen table we never use

Mum is always having a go about the state of our house coz it is full of crap and half finished I usually just tell her to shut up (I told her to foof off because of it last year and she slapped me!! :eek: in front of Chris too :mad:) but she literally walked in didn't say hello just saw some of Chris's toys on the floor in the lounge and started on a rant.
I wouldn't mind but she knows I tidy up all the toys about 5 times a day I was just enjoying a sit down and something to eat the toys aren't in the way coz there's only me in here so I decided I'd leave them until I have the energy to get down on the floor to get them and haul myself back up again!

I so know how you feel,but with me it's my dad AND I have to put up with it ALL THE TIME as he lives with us for 5/6 weeks at a time :mad: Ive just updated my facebook status to say Im gonna jump off nearest bridge.
Grin and bear it,at least they leave and you have your house to yourselves.

helen81_2

Ok,reading peoples views on the subject of having parents/inlaws staying in your house has made me realise Im quite right in feeling the way I feel about my dad living here with us for weeks at a time and Im not a complete b1tch.

Mrs_Moc

Neither my mum nor MIL visit very often, they have heard me moaning to many times about people just turning up unannounced and interrupting my work lol.

It really pees me off when people visit, because I spend ages cleaning and preparing for them when i could be doing so many other things.

In saying that, they see me practically every day as they both live 5 minutes away and im always popping in to my mums. MIL lives in the same street as the school so see her then.

When I go into labour MIL will take one daughter and my mum will take the other 2. I dont mind them knowing, but there is no way anybody would want to be in the delivery room/hospital apart from DH and my sister.

3onitsway

helen81 wrote: »

Ok,reading peoples views on the subject of having parents/inlaws staying in your house has made me realise Im quite right in feeling the way I feel about my dad living here with us for weeks at a time and Im not a complete b1tch.

Its difficult enough having anyone stay in your home, never mind with a new baby in the house - no matter how much you love them!!

My biological dad and latest wife visited last weekend, they live about 3 hours away - when he phoned to say the were coming i gave him the phone number and address of the travelinn up the road. :rotfl: :rotfl: (OH thought I was mean!)

redmel1621

I am now giving my due date out as the 26th March, there now I don't need to keep thinking I am overdue:) And that is the latest date at which I will have a baby:D

3onitsway - We get naff all offers of help, from family or friends, and when we ask any help that is agreed to is done so begrudgingly...I just don't bother anymore:rolleyes:

Mel x

karen1907

helen81 wrote: »

Ok,reading peoples views on the subject of having parents/inlaws staying in your house has made me realise Im quite right in feeling the way I feel about my dad living here with us for weeks at a time and Im not a complete b1tch.

Definitely not a b1tch!

Our parents only usually come for a weekend at a time and that is enough. I have in the past had to go to the garage to vent some annoyance when the in-laws came to stay :mad: and that was within an hour of them arriving.

I don't know how you manage 5/6 weeks. :T

feelinggood_2

I'm still waiting for all the things people are going to give me for the baby! I even had to ask my Granny to knit me a cardigan, she assumed I didn't want one! I also want her to make me one of her famous dollys with a scary face.

Millie's_Mum

3 onitsway I've had the same as you, I planned to take advantage of all offers of help this time but haven't had any (apart from the wonderful mums at millies school who have been fantastic about having millie for tea etc)

OH went back to work on monday (Eloise was 6 days) and I said could he take millie to school all week and I would pick up (I couldn't work out how to get all of us ready and up to school by 8.50), well i have taken her and picked her up the last three days so his help didn't last long, he hasn't even done the washing up, he seems to think making a neat pile of it is just as good!!!

My parents came to visit on wednesday and despite saying to my mum you know where the kettle is, they sat there for well over an hour before I gave in and put the kettle on myself.

Nicki

3onitsway wrote: »

Out of interest - how many of those with babies/children already, had helpful friends/family around? (Is it just my friends and family that are carp?).

When I had my first baby, my mum said if I didn't mind she wouldn't visit me when the baby was little as she was very nervous around new borns (my family live in Ireland and I'm in England). So, I was quite relieved when my m-i-l said that she would love to come and stay to look after me for a few weeks but would do it after my own mum had come. I was then able to say my mum wasn't coming, and my m-i-l came and stayed with us for 2 weeks after I came out of hospital and did all the cooking and cleaning for me, but was very tactful about not interfering with the baby unless I wanted her to. It was actually a really nice bonding time with m-i-l as well as baby, as up until then we hadn't got on that well, and as I'd had a c-section was also nice to have someone to do driving and heavier stuff round the house.

When I was in late pregnancy with DD (and DS was about a year old) 2 or 3 of my neighbours offered to come and look after DS when I was in labour with DD if I needed them too, as did 2 friends and the in laws. When I went into labour and needed to go into hospital it was 3.00 am and I couldn't wake one friend up by phone and we felt inhibited about waking the neighbours. Fortunately we did manage to wake the second friend up, and she stayed until in laws arrived that morning around 8.30 am. Again, after the birth m-i-l came and stayed for about a week after I came home from hospital.

My OH also took a whole month off work after the both births (combination of annual leave and maternity leave) and this was lovely, but with the job market as it is at the moment, I'm not sure we'd dare for him to do that again this time round in case they decide they can do without him for longer than a month! We haven't told the in laws yet about the new pregnancy (waiting until after the scan on Tuesday) so will have to wait and see whether m-i-l is happy to do her stuff again.

Other than that, no I didn't get any lovely offers of casseroles or babysitting from other friends! Though I don't think I did badly really for support.