Leaving my husband

Mely

Rolo...you are doing the right thing. Especially with your daughter and her boyfriend moving in. They can support you emotionally, and help out financially. Keep strong and dont let your ex emotionally blackmail you. ((((hugs)))) xxxx

chattycathyuk

maybe you just need some time alone, maybe no contact for a while, your still seeing him and hes still getting on you tittys.

You must have build up anger, which you need to let go off by having some peace, chilling out, no thinking just peace!

He's going to be hurt, his eyes you have gone, his world has gone! pain turns to anger! I think you need to understand he isnt going to change into the new man, life has changed, hes has changed as a person, age, etc. And you changed in his eyes. you have devoted your life to your children, who give you the strenght to cope!! which makes us chicks strong as we have something to live for!!! On the other hand he might think you all hate him, comes home from work, no one happy, ( because your all dealing with life and stress) maybe feels lost and hes just having a man moment, sulking!

Im so not on anyones side, but life is full on pain, anger, money and confussing hurts, all messed up!!

If you still love him, and think you can oneday be INLOVE with him again ( love him as a person, not as someone you have to be with) , explain in a letter, how you feel, why you hurt, whats going on. ask him to reply in a letter, not a text or a chat as this can get heated.

However if you feel your better off on your own, tell him, otherwise he wont let go!

Like i said in my last post if been here, im back with my now husband and i love him to bit, hes still a pain in the a** but he makes me giggle, i know if life can throw all that at us, god we can do anything, but this didnt come on a plate took alot of hard work on both sides, and still does today, compromise, you will have to do this till the day you die!!!

yoni_one

rolo-polo1965 wrote: »

He tells me everytime i take it bit more it is like stabbing him in the heart. He says all i am doing is taking not giving. Well thats tough as far as i am concerned.

He needs to realise his behaviour was totally unacceptable.

:T

Just listen to his language, 'you are all take and no give, ... taking from your home is like stabbing him in the heart' etc.

He is talking as though he an innocent victim in all this and is blaming you for his current unhappiness without any regard or real acceptance that his violent and abusive behaviour was not just part of the reason you left but the whole of it.

I am so relieved to note that you see right through it Rolo. Not only was his behaviour totally unacceptable but it sounds like it still is.

Stay strong, we are all here for you.

msb5262

It sounds as if it's all hard work, Rolo - but you're doing really well. Keep talking here if it's helping you; I think everyone on the thread is cheering you on to make a better life for yourself and your family, by whatever means.
Love Harriet x

rolo-polo1965

Tuesday

I can not believe we have been in our new house for ten days.
We all seem to be happy.
Need to sort the internet out.
I ordered BT broad band last week then cancelled it the next day when DD1 decided she was going to move in as she is transfering her sky broadband with her as its cheeper than BT.
But when we try and order Sky broad band they say there is a block on the line. Rang BT yesterday telling themthis they told me the block would be off within 12 hours.
It isnt and they have connected BT broadband.
I am so angry, they will get a piece of my mind tomorrow.

DD1 seems happy, we will all be happier once the house is tidier, we still have boxes and bags every where.

I am still getting the soppy emails:
I love you
All i want for christmas is you

I had to ring him today to check that he is still taking DD3 to the dentist tomorrow and he is so thats one less thing to worry about.
He went to the Drs on Monday morning.

He sugested he goes on an anger management course.
He prescribed him some sleeping pills and told him he should have gone years ago and got some. He also sugested we go to relate, i am in 2 minds about this but feel i ought to go for at leasy 1 meeting. So i have agreed to go for one meeting and see what they sugest, they may well tell us that there is no hope which is what they have said to various coleegues at work.

Take crae one and all and thanks for letting me talk on here.

Money_maker

Keep your chin up, Rolo, you're getting there.

I would have thought he ought to do the anger management course before you consider going to relate with him. Perhaps he could book this up now so you can at least see he is following things through. Relate can always wait.

You are doing so well, keep looking forward.
Keep us posted, there are so many folks on here following and supporting you. Love to you from each and every one of us :A

yoni_one

rolo-polo1965 wrote: »

Tuesday

I can not believe we have been in our new house for ten days.
We all seem to be happy.

Rolo, HAPPY 10 DAYS OF INDEPENDENCE FREE FROM VIOLENCE & ABUSE ANNIVERSARY!!!

And long may your power and control over you continue ....

piglet74

well done you, all of you, im thinking about you, and you sound like you are getting even stronger than you already were!! keep on keeping on!!

tkae care,

abby1234519

go go ROLOOOOO

Emmzi

hey rolo, think you are doing fab! I see the main word in his texts etc is I.

Think that says all you need to know. I hope you and yours keep staying strong!